Virgin at 22 and don't know why?

I'm still a virgin at 22 and I have no idea why. I know I am attractive based on how girls treat me. I am muscular (six pack abs) at a good height of 5'10 and I have a clear attractive face. I am black by the way. But for some reason I can never get with a girl. What's wrong with me? What am I doing wrong or what am I not doing?

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I’m 19 and a virgin but by choice. it’s not uncommon though I know people your age and older who are virgins still, you wouldn’t believe it! message me a picture of you, I’m curious! I’m sure you’re not bad looking. Maybe you just need to approach more girls? Ever thought about tinder?

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Most Helpful Guy

  • First of all, there is no WRONG in being a virgin, in fact you have an advantage in the dating world that not many have. I wish i was still a virgin, that way i could seek a virgin without feeling like a hypocrite for wanting one, but i gave mine away way to early under the illusion that i have to prove myself for whatever dumb ass reason. Anyway to your question, have you been actively trying to attract a certain girl without success or are you it all to happen without actually doing any seeking out?
    I'm missing data, please respond!. We can figure this out.

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    • I have been told numerous times that I am handsome and girls just expect me to be a player with a lot Sexual experience. Especially when I am with non black girls. Due to this I feel there is even more of a stigma against me because people expect me to be a sex freak and when they found out Im not I feel like they would think something is wrong with me. I am pretty good at acting too. Like I can act like the cool suave guy that gets a lot of women but when it comes down to getting dirty I never know how to make it happen.

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    • In that case DON'T TELL ANYBODY, women cannot keep a secret, sorry to say but they aren't very considerate people when it comes to respecting privacy, neither are they very trustworthy people when it comes to keeping things between the two of '' you'' , once you tell any girl all of them will know within a matter of days, especially if the school is somewhat small. You're right about women being very selective and judgmental but there definitely are still some with common sense and realistic expectations. If there isn't any girl in particular that you've got your eye's on, then why not wait it out?, i mean you're bound to meet new people along your way it doesn't have to be one from school, and if all the girls are competing for a few girls they will just end up getting fucked and tossed aside in which case you'll be better off without them, never allow any girl to make you plan B

    • I really don't know how to advice you since you're the one who finally has to live with the choices to make. I can however tell you how life has been and is for me, for example, i'm a 27 years old and have been sex free for roughly 8 years, maybe 9, to me it's really a non issue, i just cannot commit myself to a girl with a history of jumping on random dicks, just too much uncertainty for me to commit. And before you get any wrong ideas let me clarify, i live in Thailand, which is in southeast Asia, and as a white men living in Asia i could basically drowned in pussy tonight if that's what i was aiming towards, so i'm staying away from casual dating which i don't see a morally acceptable and i don't date short term since it gives the girls false hope, also not a supporter of prostitution so you can imagine my dilemma, i have soo many option just my moral compass won't allow me to pursue them.
      I hope this helps

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Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 3

  • its fine, being a virgin is not terrible
    but i bet you do want some special girl in your life
    i guess you just haven't met one yet

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    • Lol no Im not on that special girl kinda thing. I just want sex

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    • I do that all the time. I can get dry sex no problem it's the real deal I'm worried about

    • well if you dance with the girl try to get to know her, talk to her, sceadule a date etc... ask her if she would like to go with you somewehere after...

  • It is good to be virgin

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  • I advise you to be confident, like not cocky but confident. Put your best self out there and wear your best clothes and just let yourself feel good. if you’re desperate to just lose it you need to put yourself out there and engage in social interactions that can lead to hook ups and such, don’t be nervous. Get yourself a wing man and maybe have a look at yourself and consider what you think your best personality traits are and what you need to work on. There’s tons of stuff on the internet that can help you seem more confident and chill around girls but don’t change yourself, just work with what you have. Put out your best self and be ready to snag a great girl. I imagine you’re nervous and feel restricted by the fact that you’re a virgin but you shouldn’t be. Obviously there’s girls out there who want to sleep with porn star level guys but there’s lots that would feel special to be your first time because we’re gushy like that.

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    • This has been the most helpful comment so far. Thankyou. I will definitely take your advice.

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    • I can’t promise that obviously but they won’t be analyzing you so yeah I say just be chill and let things happen.

    • Ok Thankyou so much for your advice and time I really appreciate it

What Guys Said 4

  • Do you live in a predominately white area?
    Fo you notice that girls are attracted to you?

    If so your answer is yes then am guessing that you probably aren’t a good closer. Don’t worry about the Virgin thing though you can be a Virgin one day and the next week be a man whore so put that aside.

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    • Actually its the opposite. I go to a mainly black college but I'm not attracted to the black girls that go there. a lot of them are ghetto. However I am black and like typical black things (rap, dancing, etc) but I don't like associating myself with ghetto people. As a result I've had a hard time fitting into a social group that I am completely comfortable in.

    • You and me are very similar. I am a white black Latino if that’s makes any sense? I also listen to rap and all that but don’t really fit in with the rougher more “ghetto” crowd. From my personal experience l don’t think white girls are opposed to black guys l think you are right it’s more because of backlash than anything else. Have you tried Latinas? I think they are really hot and also are open to dating black guys at least the ones in my area are some actually have a preference for it.

    • Yea. In fact Latinos are usually the ones that I feel show the most attraction towards me. The problem is the Latinos that I have come across that I know like me are usually taken and have bfs. They will often play this passive aggressive sexual game with me where they make it obvious they want to get sexual with me but they have bfs. I don't want to be a bad guy and fuck a taken girl.

  • Your virginity is all you have to have that special someone in your life save it and focus on being the right woman and he'll find you but if you don't care find the biggest dick you can find and have some fun

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  • Looks aren't everything, girls are more inner based though being attractive definitely helps a lot of girls like funny and smart over muscular. (Not saying you aren't funny/smart just lack of info.)

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    • Lol actually.. I'm pretty sure girls like me just for my looks. Like I don't really say much and girls are always smiling at me and inviting me to things even when they barely know me. It's just the fact that I haven't had sex yet that makes me insecure. Its like this weight on my back that I can't stop thinking about. Girls practically throw themselves at me sometimes and then I don't know how to handle the attention and end up coming off as awkward and weird.

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    • Wouldn't that look bad though if I have already lied to them about my sexual history or lack there of. They will think even less of me and trust me women like guys that have sexual experience. I think what would happen is that the women would express pity for me which is not the reaction I want because pity is not attractive to women.

    • They'll likely understand and quikly forgive you for lying if you apologize. And just like guys some girls like virgins, also women like about experience as well.

  • I'm 17 and I'm still a virgin!☹️

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    • Nothing to worry about, actually be happy your a virgin, being a virgin is becoming desirable again. Not being a virgin for the sake of not being a virgin is shallow as hell, you get to demand a virgin girl without having to feel like a hypocrite. Sex is really not what porn makes you believe it to be. If i could be a virgin again i'd wait until i find a girl worth it and then go for her.

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