Why can’t I like a guy both emotionally and sexually?

Whenever I like a guy, it’s either emotionally or sexually. There’s no “mix” or “in between”. I have no idea why. I either wanna fuck him or I only want to love him and that’s it.

Most couples I see have the best of both worlds, which means they love each other but they also wanna hump each other lol. Why doesn’t this happen to me?

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Well if you're in love and you would cuddle, have strong emotional connection i guess he would make you horny somehow and you could go with the flow into wanting to have sex and probably better than casual eager to fuck some sexy dude.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Maybe your subconscious feels sex is dirty or bad and so you can't allow yourself to feel that for someone you love? I guess that would have something to do with how you were raised/family indoctrination. I believe that you can find both in one person, as you've found both in separate people. Perhaps you need to try thinking of sex as an expression of love.. and maybe stop having sex with people you don't love for a while to see if it helps the emotions and desire kick in at the same time.

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    • This is very interesting. I was raised by fundamentalist Christians and yes, they strictly mentioned sex only after marriage. You might be right

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • That's fine

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    • No it’s not. The guys I’ve been dating seem to be put off by the fact that I don’t want sex with them since I’ve already formed an emotional bond with them

    • Move to next guy, wait for your guy with whom you can feel both

What Girls Said 1

  • I was in that for a long time as well. But somehow I got lucky this time around! I dunno I guess you eventually run into the right person xD

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