How do you deal with a Virgin Mary?

Met this guy. He is 18 and a Virgin I'm quite experience opposed to him. However I find it good that he's never dated until now. I feel like I'd always have to instigate things? Help


Most Helpful Guy

  • The answer is a little bit of yes and no. Your dating strategy changes in the sense that you know you won’t be pressured or begged for sex unless the guy has his heart set on making you his first. Also, if you’re a girl who slips up a little on the first date, you should reconsider bearing too much to a guy who’s a virgin. Doing too much too soon could not only scare him away but also lead him to question your motives or lifestyle.

    Your dating strategy can also stay the same in some areas because he wants to be treated just like any other guy you date. He doesn’t want to be censored out of sexual conversation or avoid petting, either.

    Kissing and touching is fine: the guy is a virgin and not dead. He still has desires and needs, but there is just a limit on how far you can go. More than likely, the guy has had sexual encounters already but hasn’t had full-out sex. Find out what he’s done before and use those as boundaries for where you can go.

    As a virgin, the guy’s views about sex are probably different from any other cutie you’ve dated on campus. Because of this, understanding his views about sex is super important. Is he saving himself for marriage or just for a committed relationship? Is he afraid of catching a sexually transmitted infection or getting a girl pregnant? Is he religious or did he never meet the right girl? Each of these questions can factor into why your guy has decided to stay a virgin. But, no matter what the reason is you should still be supportive and remember your virgin days.

    Just the same way you thought a guy was only pursuing you for one thing, a guy can also feel that way. Cater to his needs and let him know that despite his virginity, you’re still interested in him.

    Also, make sure that you respect his decision to make it this far. There may be a few nights when you wish he wasn’t a virgin, but if you really care for him you’ll want what makes him happy. When he’s ready to finally have sex, maybe you’ll be the girl he chooses.

    Hope it Helps.😊🇮🇳

    • Thanks you. That really helps. I've only been on two dates but I can see it going somewhere that's why I want heads up. My usual dating strategy is to wait it out until I'm ready but considering he is a Virgin I want him to feel ready to so I'm going to let him instigate it. It's nice having the power but I think I'll really make him want it first as I don't want to force him into anything. The last guy I dated I made him wait 3 months and it respects me for it. I'm more attracted to this guy but I still think I should wait it out.

    • A guy's first time can be a very self-conscious and scary thing. There's so much information and "advice" out there, and so many stereotypes about things like finishing too soon, satisfying your partner, etc.

      The best way to make his first time great is simply by putting all of those worries out of his mind. Let him know that you don't care "how well he did", or how long he lasts, or anything else. There's no possible way to know what you're doing your first time... So make sure he knows that you understand that, and that you want to give him a chance to learn.

    • Thanks for selecting my opinion as Most Helpful Opinion.

Most Helpful Girl

  • So make a move on him. Just lean in and kiss. What’s the problem? As you say, you’re quite experienced.

    • I've kissed him I'm on about sexual activity

    • Why are you calling him Virgin Mary? That seems kind of disrespectful to refer to a boy using a girls name.

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 8

  • He is a human being right? He's not some alien entity. Treat him the same as everyone else. You may just have to be willing to deal with a slower pace. If you expect sex on the 2nd or 3rd date then you may have to adjust your time table.

    • No I tend to wait at least 3 months before moving to that stage and go on lots of dates to get to know each other. I'd only invite someone home if I thought they were worthy of it

  • You probably should initiate things at first. Once he's had sex a few times and feels comfortable about sex, he likely will then be comfortable enough to take the lead at times.
    Warning: He'll fall in love with you.

    • I think after a few months if either of us invite each other back I think it'll be pretty natural anyways because we get along with each other well

  • Put it on his toes when you're alone, offer yourself on a plate, if you want to avoid any awkward misinterpretations and get straight to it, which it seems like you do

  • Not sure what you're saying other than that you are a whore.

  • U just lay him down and show him a good time

  • Is he going to be your boyfriend

    • I wouldn't know. I do like him but we've only been on 2 dates. I kissed him on the second and I can tell he was inexperienced.

    • Show All
    • No way I'll make him want it and then he can instigate it

    • Oh really
      He's a newbie how you gonna make him want it

  • So, why are you calling him "virgin" even when he is?

    See, by calling him "virgin", you are making him different from other boys or from your previous relationship partners (not necessarily sexual partner).

    I dont really think that why you are thinking about sexual things. He is your boyfriend, but you should not necessarily think about sex with him.
    There are relationships Which become successful without sex. i mean​, People marry.

    So, first of all, treat him like a normal boy who loves you.
    You should first stop thinking about both of your sex life, sexual encounters or the happenings of the past.

    So, start with casual touches. Holding hands, arms, touching chest occasionally...
    Touching his hips, etc

    Then, you can start with kisses on cheeks as a special gift for him for his work, actions, jokes...

    In this manner, you can gradually make casual physical connections with him..

    Then you can kiss him on his lips once you both get overwhelmed with emotional stuff in a romantic environment

    • Now, he's a normal boy who loves you, right?
      But secretly, we also know that he's a virgin.

      Now, you should first find out if he has done anything like kissing someone , sexting or not!

      Generally, when you sext for first time and masturbate, you loose many of your sense at that particular moment!

      Many of our senses are harmed due to first experience of sexting followed by masturbation.

      Then, you should observe his behaviour with other girls around him. Does he let girls (female friends) to touch himself or not?

      How frequently does he watch porn?

      Know all these things and give enough time to your relationship. Dont hurry up! Go slow, especially because he's a virgin (secret Knowledge)

      for virgin guys,...*who have not experienced sexting*

      Since, they are not experienced, their body reacts more quickly and touch of a girl leaves a deep sensations​.

    • LOL this is not the sequence in which I had typed my opinion!!!

  • maybe try keeping it in your pants for a while and get to know each other in other ways. Eventually, if he wants to make a move, he will.

    • Yeah that's what a friend suggested. I usually tend to do that so yeah ill wait it out

What Girls Said 3

  • Just stay friends

  • if he wants to stay virgin respect him if he doesn't teach him

  • You probably would have to take the lead. But also be sure he's the one setting the pace and that you two are only doing what he's ready for.


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