No guy I've ever been with has ever chosen me. What does it take to be in a relationship?

Some stuff about me:

I'm in my early 20s and I chose the school route. Because of this my finances aren't great. I live with family, my job is crappy and overall I'm not happy with my situation but I'm making the most of it. I'm actively trying to make things better for myself while still pursuing school. Of course I'm stressed and a little depressed. But I'm doing my best.

I like shopping (when I can), I'm learning Spanish, I like watching anime and I'm usually home with my family or out with my friends. I used to go clubbing a lot but now I just chill at bars or sit at home. Most of the time I really like to chill and sleep because I'm always tired. I'm trying to start working out again and getting in control of things going on in my life.

I'm aware of my flaws. I'm not fully emotionally mature, I can be petty when I'm upset, I procrastinate and I don't like asking for help. I don't let things go and I hate being wrong. I'm actively trying to make myself better.

I'm very straight forward and I speak my mind. I don't accept bullshit. I keep things honest. I treat people how I want to be treated. I like to help people. I like to spend quality time. I like games.

Overall I think I'm a pretty decent person with flaws that I need to improve. Like everyone else. But I'm never someone who anyone wants to be with. So far guys have wanted to fuck me but don't want to get serious with me because my life isn't together, it doesn't matter that I'm trying. It's like they don't care for me as a person or I'm just somebody that isn't likeable.

Everytime I find a guy I like for who he is, they don't like me back or they stay with me for the sex and that's it. I want someone to want to stay with me like I want them and I'm starting to feel lonely.


Most Helpful Guy

  • I think you have a lot of emotional and personality issues to work through and you understand that which is good. Understanding them though isn't enough because you do actually have to work through them.

    Relationships are simple give and take. You'll get offered to be in one when someone sees you as somebody who has something they want in a partner. Currently it seems like you have more cons than pros so you aren't getting any interest. People want to be with someone who they don't have to take care of. Someone who can help them enjoy their lives.

    You don't sound like you have much to offer. You aren't happy with your own life, so there's the general discontent. You don't have a lot of money. You have personality issues etc.

    The fastest way to find a partner is to be someone who naturally others want to look up to. So being happy with your life, very well educated, healthy and fit, successful at work etc.

    Work on one thing at at time.

    • So i sound like a terrible person?

    • Show All
    • what would you recommend I do?

    • Seriously? I just gave you a list.

Most Helpful Girl

  • I'm 31 and have never had a boyfriend. Only people that want a serious relationship with me are 50+ or obese (and if those are my options I'd rather be single). The guys I like either don't like me period, or more rarely, just want sex.


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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • You'll find someone. Just need to have faith and patients for the right guy to come into your life.


What Girls Said 1

  • I know this sounds cliche but you just haven't met the right man, it'll happen :)


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