Mental illness and dating?

If you have a diagnosed mental illness, when is it the best time to tell your date? From the start, later, or not at all? I have social anxiety and have a hard time picking up on just social things in general (for example: flirting). I've seen other questions on here where people say they wouldn't even try to date someone who's mentally ill, so is it better to tell people straight up what you have and drive most dates away? Or tell them later or not at all?
  • Tell them from the start
    Vote A
  • Tell them later
    Vote B
  • Don't tell them at all
    Vote C
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Most Helpful Guy

  • Tell from the start, but maybe mental illness is a very strong way to say it. You can mention that you have social anxiety and the implications of it, I'm sure that using this term won't have the same impact as saying that you're mentally ill and it'll give him the message the same way.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Tell them when you know you trust them

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What Guys Said 11

  • Tell it at the beginning of the second date. Enough time at the first date to see that you're not a maniac talking to your hand, early enough to say you didn't hid it, and after you told hin there is the whole second date when he can get used to the thought, and can observe your behavior with the new knowledge through the second date and decide if he can cope with it or not.

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  • Here's what I think: Unless you have a mental illness that's almost immediately recognizable to those you're around, then I don't you need to announce whatever condition you have at the start of a new relationship. Get to know each other better. Don't carry any stigma around your shoulders. Let things develop naturally, and as you get closer to the other person then at some point open up when you feel comfortable doing that.

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  • It's better to for you to date people who also not completely mentally healthy. I would say tell them from the start, or at least before anything intimate.

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  • everyone is mentally ill slightly, just not diagnosed.

    Everyone has anxiety and has lack of awareness in some social activities.
    Be open so he doesn't think you're weird later on. If he can't accept that, then that's his problem and you're better off without him

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  • I believe you should tell them a few weeks into your relationship. Take the time to allow you and your new bf/gf to get to know one another, and not immediately hit them with it. To do so will close some doors that otherwise may have worked out. I know some will say you should tell them right off the bat. I disagree. What? Should you run into a woman you desire to get to know better and say " Hello, I'm Jack, and I have Clinical Depression/Anxiety/Bipolor..." I think not.

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  • from the start,
    I personally wouldn't want to spend time with a nutcase, or even worse, fall in love with one and then find out later about their mental state of mind

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  • Early as possible. But not too soon cause "hi my names John. I'm mental" isn't a very good first impressionšŸ˜‚. But you do need to tell them at some stage so they can understand

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  • I believe be upfront so I can work around it cause I have no problem adjusting.

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  • i have this issue as well. agree with the girl below.

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  • Never ever tell.

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What Girls Said 3

  • I let it come up after a few dates or weeks depending on the situation. Personally I think it's something you should share with someone if you think you want to get serious with them.

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  • I wouldn't open up our first date with it but I would tell them very soon in the relationship, when we began to really like each other. If I start with it, it'd probably creep someone out and think that that was the biggest part of my personality and I have that whole special snowflake thing or whatever. I think that discussing it early on enables them to see whether they like me or not before they even learn for sure about my mental illness, rather than making a split decision on just my health, but it's early enough that they can get out without hurting either of us a huuuuuge amount.

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  • Tell them from the start.

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