I'm SO angry with him! What should I do?

We have never met before, but we have texted for 8 weeks now. So, we planned to see each other next week (on his initiative) and he told me when he was coming home etc (he works far away). I was really looking forward to it and he told me he was too. So I asked him again today and all of a sudden he just answers that he is not coming home next week anyway because he is going to do this thing (don't want to explain here, but its like a hobby, but it doesn't matter), and this thing he will be busy doing for a week. He just said he will come home closer to Christmas instead. He didn't say what date he was coming home or anything. I study here, but my parents live somewhere else so I am going home to my parents for Christmas, so I just said "oh, thats sad, and I am going home 21st, so..." because I was really angry and dissapointed (and its true I am going home). He didn't respond but just talked about something else. If he really cared he would have told me that on his own initiative and he would have schedule a new date, but what I don't understand is why does he keep acting like he is interested if he isn't? Why use SO much time texting and snapping with a girl you really don't care about? From now on I will not text. I will just answer to his text and nothing more. I am really hurt because I have spent so much time the last months talking with him!! I just don't understand guys.. When I like someone I never date more than one person and I committ to them and I am always nice and happy and I would for example never cheat and I don't lie to people and I am very just. Still I end up getting hurt all the time anyway. People may think that I just date he wrong guys and players, but thats not true. They are completely normal, average guys with average jobs.. I like dogs and hunting, so maybe I'll just stick to that when I am finished with my education because I don't want to spend time on someone that just end up breaking my heart anyway.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • ''we have texted for 8 weeks''

    A fatal mistake because fantasy sets in and along with it, unrealistic expectations and assumptions. Neither of you know each other. Next time meet as soon as physically possible and if it goes beyond a few days, or a week... forget about it.

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    • If we were going to meet before I would have to take a plain for one hour, wait for 3 hours and then take a new plane for 2 hours and then find a bus in the middle of nowhere (and God knows how long I would have to wait for that bus) and take it for a few hours. It's a very expensive trip also, so I didn't have the money since I am a student. And where would I stay? With him? Because there sure ain't any hotels arount there.

    • Then perhaps you should ask yourself why you would 'chose' a man behind so many barriers, as opposed to a local one with none. It seems to me that somewhere in you, is confused intent, emotional unavailability and fear of real intimacy disguised as a far away connection.

      Conscious intent... to meet someone... unconscious intent... to meet no one.

    • I am moving to the place he lives in June because of work. If I were to date a local guy it would be hard for me moving so far away.

Most Helpful Girl

  • He's keeping in contact with you so a. He can get an ego boost texting a pretty girl and b. So he has a back up plan. I've dealt with guys like this before. A whole waste of investment. Get under that mistletoe girl, find a better guy before Christmas 😊

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What Guys Said 3

  • There is s strong possibility that he has a girlfriend. He needs to give the illusion that he may meet to give you reason to talk to him, but will then conveniently give a last minute excuse. You deserve better.

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    • I have him on facebook and instagram and we have mutual friends. He does not have a girlfriend, and I sure can understand why after this.

    • Then in that case, it really seems like he is far more interested and invested in the fantasy than the reality. Unfortunately some guys are that way inclined. It's certainly no reflection on you. It's likely that he would just continue to waste your time, so focus your energy on things that deserve it :-)

  • You really should not condemned the guy for a few change of plans you should not ignore him just cause of that

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  • He's hiding something

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