What do I do or why did he not want us to get engaged?

My boyfriends proposed to me tonight and our son said no no no , why did he say no to us and tries to sleep in our bed at night instead of his own bed


Most Helpful Guy

  • because he doesn't want to share his mom

    • Well first me and my boy friend adopted him. together so. I dont see why'd he would be bothered now

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    • just keep pounding it home and give him time

    • I will have to give him time

Most Helpful Girl

  • Does your son still have a relationship with his father? If he sees him often, then he’ll see this new guy (your boyfriend) as a threat. He might feel a little hurt that you would want to move on so quickly. Maybe he wishes you and his father would someday get back together. Just my opinion.

    • He doesn't know his father we adopted him but I do know some information about the mom she would have had to be a single mother and made it a closed adoption

    • oh. Just try talking to him, I’m sure he sees your boyfriend as a good father figure or big brother in some way. It just takes time to adapt. I’m sure he’ll love him like you do.

    • I hope he will love him. after all.

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What Guys Said 0

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What Girls Said 3

  • Ever spoke to him privately about the situation (your son)?

    • It's both me and my boyfriends kid we adopted him but I can try that to see. Why

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    • Are you more closer with him? Perhaps you need to ask him when your boyfriend isn’t there.

    • No I'm not closer to him.

  • How old is he? There's an old Freudian theory that small children go through a stage where they associate themselves with their same sex role model and consider them a rival for the affection of the other sex role model, basically meaning that your son has identified masculine behaviour and is vying for your attention. Getting married puts that attention at risk. Of course, this is old psychology and pretty much everything Freud's done has been written off so you can't put too much stock in the whole Oedipal complex but it's not too wild an assumption to make that he understands at a basic level, marriage can change things and marriage may mean you have less time for him.

    • He is only 4 years old and I will still have time for him even if we can have kid's

    • 4 years old is about right, yeah :P The issue in Freud's theory isn't that the kid is concerned you'll have more children, the issue is literally that he is competing with the boyfriend for attention as the male in your life.

    • I dont know Why he have a problem now when he was fine with sharing before

  • Probably doesn't want the hubby to steal attention? Or its just change I guess.

    • It will be a new change and I am wondering how he will feel when. and if we can have kid's

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