Can heterosexual guys and girls really just be friends without one (or both) ever being attracted to the other and wanting more?

Personally, I think they can, but what do you think?
  • Yes
    Vote A
  • No
    Vote B
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929

Most Helpful Guy

  • Yes, it can happen. But researchers find that usually, when a guy and girl are friends, there is some degree of sexual interest, usually by the guy. The research also shows that the girl if often oblivious to this. This does not mean they can't have a good, non-sexual relationship for many years. It does mean, the majority of the time, the guy, and sometimes both, have to deal with some degree of sexual attraction, and work through it. I have had girls that were good friends. Occasionally, for some there was no sexual attraction. For the others, I simply set the sexual attraction aside, as the friendship was important, and I didn't want any kind of sexual action or intent to ruin it.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I’m not sure. My closest friends are 2 straight guys and with one of them, our friendship starting with him trying to date me. With the other, we’ve been friends for almost 4 years now and he’s expressed romantic interests in me many times but I just brush it off. I do flirt with him a bit sometimes but nothing crazy. Aside from those two, EVERY close male friendship I have ever had included the guy wanting to be my boyfriend at some point in our friendship.

    I think that even if you aren’t the one showing the attraction in the other person, they may be secretly attracted to you. Friendships are usually caring and nurturing relationships which is something many people want from an SO.

    Your partner is usually your best friend so if you are attracted to them physically, you will probably want more from someone who is just your friend.

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 28

  • It definitely can (I have some female friends that are great and are like sisters to me, so I could never imagine myself in a relationship with them).

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  • Sometimes there is mutual respect but no sexual chemistry. So it's easy for them to be friends. Sometimes there is mutual attraction, and it may even be acknowledged, but at least one is in a happy committed relationships and that's not going to change. So they can remain friends. If the attraction is mutual, they may avoid getting into tempting situations (e. g. being alone together).

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  • YES !! For crying out loud... One of my closest friends is a young, smart, psychology student - and a professional swim-suit model ! We do a lot of stuff together- non sexual - we go swimming in the ocean, stripping down, we go to welness (whatever the fuck that is) and we sleep in the same bed if one of us didn't felt like going home...

    Is that really such a huge enigma how and why we are able to do that?

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  • I believe the only way men & women can be friends is if there is a mutual sense of unattraction between the two of them. Otherwise, someone is going to compromise the relationship & say something to confess their feelings, bottle up their progressive sadness over never having done so, or leave in frustration.

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  • Yes of course ! sure sometimes i get sexual thoughts about them but its not an inconvenience as I know it won't happen. You can easily dismiss such thoughts. Same with girls

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  • It's against nature for men and women to not ever have sexual thoughts of one another. Sure, they can be friends and never act on their urges, but they will still have those thoughts, even if it seems out of character.

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  • They can pretend but not really.

    Just recently there was a news story about this. A guy tried to rape his "long time best friend" while she was asleep.
    He just finally cracked is what happened.

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  • I think they can, some people just aren't attracted to each other in a sexual way.

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  • I think within 3-4 meeting guys generally decide that they want the girl to be a friend like dude , or he wants her as girlfriend or just fir time pass

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  • Women: "Yes, I have many platonic guy friends."
    Men: "Yes, I have many girls in my life that I haven't banged yet."

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  • Yes, but it's especially difficult if a guy has sexual urges at ALL.

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  • I have a female best frisky going on 18 years. Granted we had Dec only once. We feel that gave us a special bond.

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  • Yeah, I've had a number of female friends who I wasn't interested in other than as a friend.

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  • I think so. In my case, anything more than platonic. friendship is not practical.

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  • Its possible but its also been a source of girlfriends for me. Eventually they fall in love and need more

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  • I have many female friends who are just friends and nothing more, so it absolutely is possible.

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  • i dont think they can. because feelings are something, that you can't control

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  • Aren’t you friends because you are attracted to each other for one reason or another?

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    • No, I'm not attracted to my girlfriends! I have had male friends (both gay and straight) that I've had purely platonic friendships with, and I wasn't attracted to them. If any of them were attracted to me I was never aware of it.

    • I think you missed my point or perhaps I wasn’t expressing it correctly. If your friends with someone you’re attracted to them for some reason. And sometimes that attraction can lead to something more.

  • Yes, I'm friends with different girls... But I still would like to see them naked

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  • Yes but it's rare. You both have to find the other person unattractive.

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What Girls Said 8

  • I don't believe in friendship between a man and a woman. And this is because of women! Women are emotional creatures. They can develop deep feelings towards someone who they do like and trust. If this is a girl, it is only a good friendship. But if this a man, this will turn into love.

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  • Many of my good friends are male and very mature people regardless of relationship status. If they made sexual advances it would probably ruin the friendship and I'd stop talking to them. If people are emotionally mature and healthy they wouldn't be swayed by lust.

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  • Lol i'm getting When Harry Met Sally vibes... but yeah I think so

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  • I have many male friends and they are quite simply just that, Friends.

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  • I tried it and it did not go well at all. He kept flirting with me even though i made it clear we were just friends.

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  • It's possible but it's never worked for me personally

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  • I've done it before.

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  • Can't be friends.

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