What kind of behavior is this?

I consider myself to be a very giving person when it comes to especially people I care for.

Im very giving with my best friend/ lover.

I know she has had issues in the past that family members will help her and then throw in her face the help they did for her. Past relationships, friendships been the same.

1. I'm not like that
2. I know how she's been treated before so I'm very cautious with her.

But every time we get into like a big fight, she always says compulsively that she will return to me everything I've given her.

For example;

We got into a fight earlier today cuz I bought her and her mom a plane ticket to New York City. And because they went detouring more than they should off - they were so close to missing the flight. I got a little mad cuz knowing how far from the airport they are- they shouldn't have gone detouring like that. And I told her that.

She started saying. I'll return your fucking money, etc... out of the blue.

Why is she like this? Have you guys experienced this before with a girlfriend?


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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 2

  • She is like that because she doesn't know what a friend is. If she can't figure that out then perhaps she isn't much of a friend.

    Yes I know that is the farmers approach. If a weed is growing in the garden, pull it out. At some point, you have to decide if she is taking so much from you in terms of her consideration (or lack of) that for your sake, you need to set her free from your grief.

  • It's probably because it's how she has been shamed before. Like people telling her she is a financial burden.

    • It really hurts me. Because I've never done that to her.

    • It's nothing against you. Sge us just doing what sge has been made to feel like she has to. Helping her understand she doesn't is what you could do

    • Thank you. 😔I will!

What Girls Said 1

  • She probably feels guilty because you're spending money on her. I get the same way because I can't work currently. It all comes spilling out in moments of stress. Especially when you feel like you can't give them anything back or youve been treated as a burden in the past.


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