How do I deal with a guy with mental illness?

What’s the best advice to conquer a relationship with a guy with mental illness

0|1
125

Most Helpful Guy

  • Communication, education and patience.

    He has to be actively seeking help at the same time, otherwise nothing is going to work out between him and anyone. He needs therapy and medication (if necessary) and he needs to take it seriously. He needs to learn about his own disease and COMMUNICATE if he's having a "sick day" or needs alone time or communicate whatever other needs may arise for him specifically. If he hasn't already taken the initiative, open that line of communication.

    You need to EDUCATE yourself as well. I know this seems like I'm putting an unfair burden on you, but believe me it will help. Read books, articles, talk to professionals, etc. Learn why he might behave the way he does and try to understand his feelings/delusions/compulsions/etc.

    PATIENCE should be obvious. Even if he's doing everything right, most mental illnesses are life-long deployments, and a sufferer is going to have some bad days. There are going to be times where it is hard for people he loves, but as long as it isn't abusive behavior, try to be understanding. Sometimes it's hard for depressed people to get out of bed. Someone with OCD might find it hard to do anything in a timely manner. The specifics are variable.

    Also, you have to take care of yourself first. I'm mentally ill, so I know from experience, I can be a fucking burden, and I would feel awful if that was someone else's problem too. Have boundaries, communicate them, and look out for yourself first and foremost.

    0|0
    0|0
    • Yea Im in the field that’s why I’m taking a little mental break. Not even going to say anything. He has my number. Sometimes less is better. Let him have some breathing space.

Most Helpful Girl

Recommended Questions

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 24

  • Don't. It's neither your right nor your responsibility to care for him unless you're his mental health professional, and then it's highly unethical and in some cases illegal to pursue a relationship with him.
    If he's functioning normally with treatment, his mental health isn't a concern. If he's not, stay away. You can't help; it's a disaster waiting to happen.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Depends on how severe it is, but don't try to fix him. Leave that to the experts. If you love him and want to stay with him, learn about his problem, figure out how to prevent triggering him, and be there for him when he needs someone to talk to. People with mental issues generally don't like to be pressured or talk about it all the time.

    0|0
    0|0
    • So the more space the better

    • Depends on his illness, but I think yes. But don't abandon him, give space but make it known you are available if he needs you and leave it at that.

  • Just tell him positive things , tell him you will lend a listening ear
    when they need to talk things over that is bothering them. That's
    about all you can do to tell them things to make their self
    feel better.

    0|0
    0|0
    • I’m giving him space right now.

    • Show All
    • So the more time the better

    • Yeah cause you both could start feeding off of each others anxieties and such etc.

  • It all depends on the mental illness, how he handles it, and what he is doing to keep it under control.

    0|0
    0|0
    • Ptsd from being a marine. Should I give him space? I need my own space.

    • Show All
    • Awesome and good luck 😀

    • I just need time to process it on my own. I suspected it but now it’s as real as it gets lol

  • PTSD from what? Is he self diagnosed? There's a lot of unanswered information here that changes the answer dramatically.

    0|0
    0|0
    • He was a marine.

    • Show All
    • Sounds like you are the last thing this guy needs then. I feel truly sorry for him. You come across as a narcissist who won't even communicate honestly with someone who has reached out to them for honest communication, and you have turned to some anonymous strangers on the internet for people to validate your desire to be selfish instead of owning it, and having not received it in one thread you've started another one. Pathetic.

    • I care about him. I just froze when he told me.

  • Just be caring and understanding, and prepare to deal with therapists every now and then, in case something triggers him.

    0|0
    0|0
    • And I’m also giving him space. He just told me. I suspected it but now it’s real and I need to process it on my own.

  • You should treat him as you treat a normal person. If he acts different than expected, just act as you do when a 'normal' person do that.

    0|0
    0|0
  • If you know the exact illness, you could read up on it. That would help.

    0|0
    0|0
    • That’s what I’ve been doing. Space is also good. I need to process it. Just found out Saturday night. I suspected it but now it’s real!

  • You have to give us some more information. What mental illness?

    0|0
    0|0
    • PTSD from being a marine

    • Show All
    • Maybe stay in touch but stay away for a while is best.

    • We do best with less so I think it’s best I’m silent

  • The best thing to give him is ur time and love nothing else can't get past his illness

    0|0
    0|0
  • He needs to talk to a professional

    0|0
    0|0
    • Should I give him space? I need my time alone too.

    • Show All
    • So by him telling me he has ptsd that’s a huge sign he likes me and is willing to be vulnerable with me

    • Absolutely! At least I think so. It's a huge deal for me to tell about my mental illnesses.

  • Support.

    0|0
    0|0
    • I don’t know if I should give him space or not. He’s a lot right now.

    • Show All
    • Do you think he’ll respect me more for taking my time?

    • I would. :P

  • What illness?

    0|0
    0|0
    • PTSD from being a marine

    • Show All
    • I just need time to process it on my own. I suspected it but now it’s as real as it gets lol

    • He’s definitely dealing with intense trauma and says go away bc of that. It’s not personal. Then he centers himself. It’s a cycle.

  • only pros need to be involved, I promise

    0|0
    0|0
    • He told me he had ptsd. Does it get more vulnerable than that?

    • let's not even get interested in "the bait" and move on!

  • You dont.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Meditation usually helps with stress and anxiety

    0|0
    0|0
  • Professional help.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Same way you deal with your own mental illness.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Wyd what kind of illness

    0|0
    0|0
  • Don't bother, just leave

    0|0
    0|0
  • More from Guys
    4

What Girls Said 0

The only opinion from girls was selected the Most Helpful Opinion, but you can still contribute by sharing an opinion!

Recommended myTakes

Loading...