Is it okay to date more than one person?

So I'm very young and I've actually never been in a relationship before, I get lot's of offers but it's very hard to choose from a wide range of guys, I'm not looking for anything serious I just want to have fun, I mean your only young once but I don't want to hurt anyone at the same time, and I was thinking of dating more than one guy and seeing which one I like most but I don't want to be labelled a slut I just want to try my options before I become committed to someone, I don't want to date on guy and somewhere down the line I regret it but the other guy I like is no longer available. Of course in the long term If I really liked one of them I'd only date them and be faithful and committed to them only, I don't cheat but it's kinda like "try before you buy" if you get what I mean but I don't know if that's considered a bad thing to do or not.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Just my opinion... I think it's a good thing. Not all but some guys will date a few girls at once to do just that.. test the waters. Unfortunately yes girls doing it can get labelled a slut a lot of the time which is wrong. With or how many people you sleep with is no one else's business though. Enjoy life.. experiment... be whom ever makes you happy.
    You don't have to worry about hurting others it is part of growing up and dating , we are all trying to find happiness.

    Hope it helps. 🙄

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Most Helpful Girl

  • As long as you are completely honest about your intentions, and you don’t commit to an exclusive relationship unless you are actually going to be exclusive, it’s totally okay.

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    • I guess this ultimately depends on how serious you are getting with these guys. If you’re at a point in your life where you’re dating multiple people, then you should not really be at all serious with any of them. You will probably reach a point in your life where you are ready to get more serious with just one person. But I think a lot of the responses to your question are from people who are slightly misunderstanding what you mean, and/or getting butthurt over the idea of a woman not instantly committing herself to the first man who looks her direction.

    • Fact is it’s totally normal for people date casually before committing. I’m honestly not sure why everyone is so shocked by this.

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What Guys Said 26

  • Sadly the try befor you buy doesn't work for dating. Lets say i was one of the guys: if i knew you were seeing other guys, id be looking elsewhere as well and id just stay with you for how ever long it took me to find someone faithful. And i wouldent even feel bad if i just dropped you over night, yes you would feel more like an object to use for sexual pleasure than an actual/potential lover

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  • Yes, dating is a get to know you type deal. It is not like an relationship. However you should be honest with all parties envovled that you are gerting to know other people. If they are truly into you they will make their best effort to take up as much time with you as they can.

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  • No. It is not. I think the only exception is that if all parties consent to this. You want less drama in your life, I suggest you not complicate things. Life is already too complicated.

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  • If you're honest with your intended mates from the beginning, there's nothing wrong with having more than one line in the water. But you have to be honest with them, and you have to respect their wishes if they decide you're not a match cuz they're not down.

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  • Imagine you keep trying out different guys and none of them properly fit the bill then eventually before you know it you live at home with 16 cats and call them your babies. Now Imagine you pick one guy who you think is the best fit for you , you have a few happy years together you then fall into a crippling depression and no longer love him , he catches on to this and decides to find love elsewhere. I guess what I'm trying to say is whatever you decide to now could end up shit either way.

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  • Its a grey area. You wanna find the right match by going out with different guys but you'll end up hurting a bunch of guys in the process who only date one girl at a time. You'll just have to determine which is more important to you; you're "fun" or not hurting guys.

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  • flirt with as many as you like until you find a person you really like/love.

    I don't understand young people who try to copy their parents or older people by saying, oh I have a bf/gf, as if they are married.

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  • Sorry but if it was me and im an option for her please just pick someone else please, how can you get to know someone when your juggling 2+ other ppls personalities.

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  • Look people will always judge you. Buy your idea of fun is heart ache to many boys. Do you require that many heart aches for small fun of yours?

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    • It’s okay to want to get to know people and assess your options. It’s actually very smart. As long as she’s being honest, there’s nothing wrong with what she’s doing.

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    • Boys become dumb when the dopamine rush kicks in. 😂😂😂..

    • Love and lust can make anyone dumb. But we all have a responsibility to make smart choices for ourselves. If you don’t have an agreement to be exclusive with your partner, or you have not established any form of committed relationship with them, then you can’t expect them to magically know that that’s what you want and expect. Nobody is a mind reader- not even women.

  • I think it's fine to "go on dates" with more than one person, but be honest with them. How you choose to do that is up to you, whether you mention it up front or just if asked. There are a lot of unspoken rules with dating, and you might be better served speaking them.

    Know that cheating is just dishonesty. Omission can be dishonesty, depending on the context. Try to be a good person, and know that anything can be ok as long as everyone involved feels fine about it.

    For whatever it's worth (though it's beyond the scope of your question) some people even have more than one serious relationship at a time. I've dated several such girls. It's not for everyone, but again, it's just about honesty and what everyone feels comfortable with.

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  • Well, the want needs to be reciprocal or at least known, and accepted not everyone is wanting to try before they buy but, in the end I believe it would come down to the guys themselves being okay with it..

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  • If you’re honest to each of the guys about it, as in telling them you’re seeing a few others, there’s nothing wrong with it.

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  • As long as one is honest about his/her intentions, I think it's absolutely OK.

    That's how we find out who is right for us and who isn't.

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  • That's not really how the dating world works... So, I have to ask: How is this going to work? Do you date a couple guys and not tell the guys about each other? Do you tell the guys that you are going to date that you are also dating another couple guys? Do you even have enough time to properly spend with each of these guys? Are the guys you date allowed to date other women while dating you? The reality of the situation is that you are setting yourself up for failure. Just about any guy you date is going to want to be the only guy you date and if he is the type of guy that doesn't mind you dating other guys, then he's probably going to be dating other women. Is that how you want to start a long term relationship? This is why dating is so difficult and people get hurt. I'm not saying that you shouldn't go out and have fun and "try before you buy", but I'm betting you will end up disappointed.

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    • Yes she tells them, yes they're allowed to do whatever they want. Enough time isn't an issue when you're not looking for anything serious. She doesn't appear to want a long term rela out of this.
      (Correct me if wrong, op!)

      I did this. I know a lot of people who did. It usually works fine as long as everyone is honest and the expectations are realistic.

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    • "I'm not looking for anything serious I just want to have fun"

      It just depends on which sentence you quote. Also, it's how I started my long term relationship. I wasn't looking for serious, but I was open to it if it would happen.

    • @Felinegirl As I said, I didn't say it wouldn't or couldn't work. I've just seen not or work or go badly more often than it working well. Also, again, she can do as she pleases and if it works out, then that's awesome.

  • If they’re okay with it, sure. If you don’t tell them or they’re not okay with it, thats what would make you a slut.

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  • You can hangout with them as friends before dating. It will help you to understand who suite you most.

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  • That depends on everyone involved, but I doubt most people would be ok with it.
    I wouldn't be.

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  • It is a bad thing. Just think if the same thing happens to you. Think if you were an option too.

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    • Everyone is someones option. And if you're not dating people then it's proberbly you it's being done too.

  • What a dumb question.

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  • You think boys are toy that you can buy

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What Girls Said 5

  • No it’s not ok. You know it’s not. you are the 18-24 bracket, so not that young.

    Have you ever seen a programme where cheating was encouraged and worked? Unlikely.

    If you think it’s okay though, so is crack, meth, and prostitution! Happy hunting!

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    • Someone clearly didn't read anything I actually wrote and just the title instead

    • Because my phone allows me to comment without opening the whole question.

      Upon reading your description, I pretty much stand by what I said. If I found out I was one of a few like a chocolate selection box, I’d be very insulted. Wouldn’t you?

  • If you talk to them and they say its okay then u can be poly

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  • Yeah.

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  • Yes.

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  • Yes it's okay, as long as you're honest to the people you're dating.

    I believe you're not doing anything wrong as long as you're not hurting anyone. So don't hurt their feelings, be careful for your own feelings, do it safe and have fun :)

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