Am I doing the right thing?

So my lover of 10 years has a natural curiousity for other men. Now I am the man in the relationship and she respects that my decision is law! I want to make it clear that this is her only flaw! She is a perfect woman aside from this 1 thing. So my question is... She likes texting and videoing with other men due to her curiousity, and she can sometimes spend a whole day on the phone! I set the rules within the limits I can handle. Rule 1. You can't do it when I'm not home.
Rule 2. You can do it when I'm sleeping if your within view.
Ruke 3. You can't discuss meeting up in person.
Rule 4. Include me anytime I have the urge to ask.

Now she understands that these rules are for our protection. She knows that the rules are to prevent me becoming jealous.
She has never broken one of my rules! She asks me every day if I want her to uninstall. Part of me says yes! But I always say no because she has insane hormones that no man can fully satisfy! Like 10 times a day lol.

So my question is... Am I doing the right thing by allowing her to be herself? With my rules it's not damaging the connection between us. But is this ok or not?


Most Helpful Girl

  • For whoever says it's controlling, I ultimately have to disagree with them. Now I do disagree just because you're the man the "decision is your law", because this is just more of a mutual understanding thing.

    I'm going to say that, yes, you're doing the right thing. Though this all comes down to YOU being comfortable. It shouldn't be damaging any sort of connection between you two because you two are pretty open with each other already. I think it's okay; practically an open relationship.

    • Thanks for your opinion! It's sort of like that I guess. Just not physically, just fantasy

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What Girls Said 2

  • You're not allowing her to be herself... you're allowing her to cheat on u. She obviously doesn't respect your relationship or love you the way she should. Sounds like she's bored. It will only continue to bring u pain to allow her to do things like that. You deserve better.

    • Maybe, but it's ultimately my decision. Maybe she is bored! 10 years is a while. But still, she's an amazing person! She works hard, she's a great person and sge respectifully asked my permission. I think she deserves to have a little fun. Even if sometimes it's a little hard for me.

  • If your both happy with it then I dony see why it wouldn't be okay


What Guys Said 2

  • I don't get it, is she just looking for friends to talk with? It seems a little weird she just talks to men.

    • No she's looking for sexual intercourse with other men online!

    • Show All
    • I don't like it if that's what you mean. She has... Overactive needs that 1 man can't satisfy. I just want her to be happy and be free spirited

    • I dont think you're doing the right thing at all but good luck.

  • Seems a tad controlling... Do you not trust her?

    • I trust her. The rules are simply to prevent my jealousy from causing strain on the relationship! She can have as much fun as she wants so long as she doesn't sneak it, hide it, or develop a relationship with the individual.

    • Why not just trust her to tell you what's going on instead of trying to control her?

    • The control is necessary. My mind races if not within boundaries. And when my mind races, my jealousy comes out. Like I said, she prefers I be in control, she respects my decisions and I don't abuse my privelage! The rules are designed to prevent chaos and maintain mental stability.

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