Should I settle for any guy that will look at me?

So I am 25 years old and I'm definitely obese. I've been trying for years to lose it and can't seem too. I eat mostly healthy food and go to the gym and work 50 hours a week in manual labour. I go to the doctor regularly and try to keep track of my health. I have come to terms with who I am and what I look like and I try to tell myself as long as I keep trying to live as healthy as I can then that's what matters. I've been single for a very long time not that guys haven't been interested I just have never met the one that you have that something with. I never feel like guys should just be attracted to me I understand there are body preferences and that fine.

Today though ugh my dad said I'm being to picky that I should be dating any guy that would look at me. That I will be single forever if I don't learn to settle. Is he right? Will I be single forever just because I'm fat? Should I just settle?

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Most Helpful Guy

  • No. Absolutely no. You need to settle with someone you like and you feel can last, not picking someone just because is interested in you. What are you, a public parking lot for dicks? Tell your father "better single than divorced with children".

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Most Helpful Girl

  • NEVER! Your dad needs to WAKE UP before you get handed down to wolfs. Your dad needs help! Do NOT LISTEN. Settling is the worse you can do. He is setting yourself up for failure and getting hurt. That is unwise advice! Here is what you need to understand right now:

    1. Your health is top priority! Being obese is a big no-no. And it should have nothing to do with attracting men. Let me just say this: men lust. Many won't care about you in that way because they want something to lust after and they can have sex with like a dog or wild animal, and call it natural instinct. It's not natural.

    2. We are in a cesspool of people who are very physical, superficial and materialistic. A person should love and value you for you. They think such matters are either boring or a fairytale and it's sweet or 'cute'. That it doesn't exist in the real world. That is not true at all. It's because they don't hold those values. So what does that mean? That you have to find somebody who holds those same values as you do. So if you want somebody to love you for you, whether thin or fat, big or small, then it will take some time. Perhaps longer than you would want. But if you give up, then you will highly regret ever being in a relationship, because you could have been receiving something much better.

    Don't get me wrong. I am no way saying that you should give up or wait years upon years for something you could have already got. All I am saying is for you to stick to the plan and don't build yourself up as a person whom somebody can and wants besides desires to love and take care off. Because the more you have self-loathing and other problems, your going to make out as a toxic partner with more emotional baggage one doesn't need. And it will destroy every possible relationship you have. It's not worth it. But if you know this is something that you need, then don't give up the fight. You know what you have to do. So why question it? Remove all doubt and do what you have to do. It's not like it isn't in you to do it. You just have to keep at it until you get the desired results you need and want. You can't pay attention to what any and everybody says. Or else it will throw you off. You have what it takes, so don't give in. And don't give up.

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What Guys Said 4

  • Yea if you are obese you are not going to have to pick of the litter, you ate going to have to make concessions.

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  • You know, we can't answer that for you, miss. What do you think you should do? What are your options?

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  • don't settle for anyone then

    unless you can manipulate them into giving you money

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  • No you need to have confidence in yourself

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What Girls Said 7

  • Its very simple - date an obese guy.

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  • He isn't right but you need to try harder. I suggest you research Keto or Atkins or something. Keto is better bc you'll feel more full and satisfied. Stick to the plan, lose the weight and you will have many more options along with a better healthy life. Do this for yourself.

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  • No, settling for the bottom of the barrel will turn out awful. Obviously it may be harder to find men physically attracted to you but plenty of men aren’t petty. In fact my ex cheated on me with a bigger girl. Never just settle because you’re not a cum dumpster, and as long as you’re not an ass you’ll find someone!

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  • Your dad sounds like a dick. I think everyone should keep their horizons broad. I never thought I’d end up dating the kind of guy my boyfriend is but here I am.

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  • First of all, don't be so hard on yourself. Being obese in no way means you should lower your standards just to get a boyfriend, or that you deserve any less than anyone else. Everyone should have standards when it comes to dating. You like what you like, don't settle for less. Keep eating healthy and going to the gym. As long as you're doing your best to stay healthy, that's all that matters. There are plenty of men out there who will love you for who you are, no matter what size or shape you are. Be confident with your body, and soon enough you'll find the man who loves you and everything about you... including your body.

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  • don’t settle for anyone I rather be fucking single then flying through douchebag each month but about your weight as long as your trying trust me if your trying everyday your just going to end up being skinny you can’t be the same weight forever but I’m bi and personally coming from me I wouldn’t mind aslong as your trying to be healthy not weight wise just not on death and decently attractive with a great personality but I’m not talking 600 pounds here because they should of started dieting like ages ago

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  • You know funny thing that settling... No matter who you are or how pretty, that is what they always tell you. Then one day you wake up, realize you've been dealing with a whole lot of shit have no expectations of anyone else and aren't really getting anything out of it. Why not just be single? Pretty might widen the pool but it also has the downside of everyone trying to stick it in you. Consider it a bonus that if people talk to you it means they are interested in you and start from there. Don't be miserable just to say you are in a relationship.

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