Not really interested in dating or relationships, is this normal/healthy?

lilaqua
Hello G@G,

After finishing school and being thrust into the real world I've been pondering why I have so many excuses for not wanting a romantic relationship right now, as well as into the near future. To me, the thought of dating and having a partner is kind of off putting and honestly frightening and I'm wondering if the reasons behind my aversion to romance is justified. I'm going to make a little list to outline my issue in more detail.

1. I am feeling like i'm lacking in value as a partner, on both a superficial and emotional level. I have this constant buzz at the back of my mind telling me I'm too ugly, too weird, too distant and not nice enough to ever warrant a long or short term relationship. I keep telling myself why would someone date me if there's so much better out there, both in looks and personality wise. I think any person who is interested in me is lying/using me for something.
2. Emotional investment. I think some people are thrilled at the idea of getting emotionally involved with someone but I am petrified. Petrified that I cannot deal with it and I can't be there for someone in their time of need. I also don't know if I can really be prepared for heartbreak that is seemingly inevitable.
3. The men I meet have very little in common with me. My world is full of women. I rely on them for emotional comfort, love, happiness and socialisation, we can talk for hours without getting tired and know each other inside and out. With guys, at least the ones i've met it's different. They're not particularly interested in actually being around women for purposes other than sexual gratification or validation, and even if they were, I don't have anything in common with them. I also find that the guys around me aren't very nice people, which really influences how you see the gender.

I want to know If anyone feels the same way/is this a correct line of thinking.
Not really interested in dating or relationships, is this normal/healthy?
25
7
Add Opinion