When is too soon to ask someone to be your gf?

So met this guy online we hit if off and have been "dating" for a little over a month. We talk everyday for hours and text all throughout the day, he told me that he got off all his dating apps and me too. He says he can see me in his future we talk about marriage/kids, have not slept together yet. He asked me to come home and meet his family. The thing is I've hinted about him giving me a title but he just stays quiet and says we will get there. I'm really confused. He also "dated" his last girlfriend for a year and they broke up because he wouldn't call her his girlfriend. He said that I'm different that's why he wants me to meet his mom etc, but he also throws out confusing signs as in he said his lease is up in another 8 months and if things are good he will move closer to where I am, but no mention of us possibly living together, and he wants to travel this summer, but is not offering for me to come on any of his trips. Also he hasn't friended me on FB although not a big deal just weird. How can I meet his family without all these other things happening? He says he's ready to settle down but I don't know.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I don't like this because it sounds like you've never met him in real life before. There is nothing that says too early or too late, all relationships are also different so you can't compare them. You just need to be on the same page. Him not making it "exclusive" between you makes him sound indecisive and let's face it, nobody wants to make life changing decisions with an indecisive person.

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    • Great advice! Yes we have been out in person quit a bit, made dinners together etc. we sit in his car after a date and talk for like 5 hours. It's great, but I don't know why he just won't lock this thing down already. Is it because it's only been a little over a month? Is it because we haven't slept together? I just don't get how he can take me home to meet the family when we're only just "dating" as he calls it.. it almostmakes me feel like I want to "date" other people until he makes up his mind I mean why am I exclusive to him if he's not to me?

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    • Oh my goodness your so wise!! He is Chinese and I'm German. Very good call. I will defiantly not have sex until we are exclusive, and even then wait awhile to make sure it's for real and just not something that he's saying. He seems very cautious which is fine, but when he tells me things like " I've never felt this way before" and "I can see myself marrying you and starting a family" then why the hell am I not your girlfriend already? When I talk to him about it he says we will get there naturally, but it's more of putting the cart before the horse type of thing that's confusing coming from him.

    • Everything with a grain of salt right? I'm Asian as well but not traditional in that sense so I can't really weigh my opinion there, he may be waiting for that approval before he makes it official and that could possibly be why he's pushing for you two to meet. I don't want to make this a thing about culture but you two seem really invested especially if he wants the meet up to happen so if I can give you any last advice it would be...
      To meet, have a great evening together and talk, let him know how you feel. Aren't relationships built on communication and honesty or am I just understanding this wrong lol. If he cares for you that deeply then he should be able to drop his "masculine walls" and talk about his feelings. Which even I have difficulty doing. No ultimatums though if possible. Men and women don't like em. I wish for the best in both of You! Everything should work out just fine!!

Most Helpful Girl

  • When ypu don't know her enough.

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What Guys Said 2

  • There is no "too soon". Only "too late".

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  • Its never too soon

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