What is the woman's job when it comes to dating and courtship? (Page 2)
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That is an old-fashioned view because not a lot of women were allowed to work nor did they get as much as men did. It's not the man's job to do so, if the person courting wants to it's a nice way of getting the attention of the other person, but both men and women can do so.
Women have always been allowed to work. We have documents dating back to the 1300s of female master blacksmiths. Women chose not to work because quite frankly it sucks and especially historically as it took you decades to get to a point where you could set up a shop (otherwise you where traveling from village to village practicing your craft) and potentially make money plus it was all grueling physical labor jobs which women didn't want. Also their is no wage gap, women got paid pretty much for what they worked which was less then men because they wanted to stay home with the kids as much as possible (not knocking it, just stating a fact).
And that's the history of which country?
Helion! Have a "thank you" gif!
All of them (but in particular the west). Do you honestly think a man would stop a woman from working if it did not adversely affect him? We don't get paid money to work because its a privilege, we get paid to work because the task wouldn't get done otherwise. Work is not some magical privilege, its a burden which is why women, having the option not to work, chose not to work. In fact if a man could not care for his wife and she had to work, he was considered a dead beat and this was grounds for divorce. Again, a man isn't going to stop a woman from working unless it directly and very negatively impacts him and even then stop would be a strong word.
That highly depended on social status, I do get your point and agree with it, just that a lot of women were also getting in a relationship and married because it would secure them a life without it, yet their jobs was about having a proud clean home, good food and taking care of the children. Being the mistress of the house and follow good etiquette rules was something more important than a job for some families. But that's just in one period of time. Now take a chill pill
First and foremost, I am not upset, I'm just stating that what you said is factually incorrect. I'm not emotional about it don't know why you would suggest I was. Secondly, your second statement isn't correct either. Yes women who didn't work cooked and cleaned, but that's because they didn't work. Its not like that's some how unfair, he worked, depending on the era, upwards of 100 hour weeks (it wasn't until the early 1900s that men even got more then one day off a week (sunday and that was because you where not suppose to work on the Sabbath) to pay for the house, fix any problems that the house had (as calling some one to fix anything was really rare) putting food on the table etc. It was simply showing gratitude for all the work that he did. Again, not sure why so many people claim that this was something that was forced on women, they wanted to do these things to show their gratitude to their husbands who where slowly killing themselves to provide all of this to their wives.
100 hour work weeks in a factor or a couple of hours of cooking and cleaning? Which one sounds worse to you? So as I said, women where very happy with that arrangement (which is why women in the fifties are happier then women today and women in traditional relationships report higher levels of happiness and satisfaction).
Traditionally, it was to remain pure and untouched so as to still be considered valuable enough to marry.
There is a growing number of females that may split the check or rotate the check based on dates and there's also some females out there too that also ask out and approach the guys. Even though this is not a majority it's more common than it Used to be
The woman's job is to just be herself. If she feels to pay for a meal or two, or pay for gas, or whatever she chooses it's up to her. In a rational mind, if she really does care about the other person and sees herself with him/her in the long run, she would try to support that person in whatever way; financially, morally etc.
Each man & woman are unique individuals. And when they interact that is unique to how their personalities mix.
Thinking back, I think all of the fun dates I had were spontaneous and not making demands on each other or treating it like a job interview or a test. Sure, you both are looking for things but it’s not rigid like your question implies in my opinion.
Nothing, that's why they love it so much and "it's fun". The guy does ALL the work (and stress), and they can pick and choose who they want or don't want.
The girls job is to rent out the gladiator ring, provide weapons and pit all the contenders against each other XD
To take care of you, showering you with love, cook for you, be there for you, make your stress day better at night, massage you, supporting you, buy gifts, and the list goes on..
After that, if the relationship go to marriage, give you descendants, raise kids, keep the house tidy and clean, work too if it need, have sex with you (?), and be your partner until you old and grey.
Still not enough?
Everything sounds perfect except the sex part. Sex is not a favor a woman would give instead she is getting orgasms.
U sound like a wife tho. Do those things for a guy who appreciates it.
That's enough for me lol
@TheUglyMan Thankyou! haha
Well for 1, women want equal rights... Well then start acting like an equal. U can be the first to approach. U can be today. U want to make the guy know Ur interested. U can today. Nothing's wrong with going out sometimes and being that go getta. I've had a few do this to me... And I found it quite interesting. Altho in the end, my friends know I'm the lion. I'll take care of them. If that makes sense.
I agree with the women. Nobody has a "job" in Dating. Everyone does what they are comfortable with.
So if you like somebody, you let that somebody know and ask that somebody out. Agree in beforehand what the date will be (cheap or no cost) and that's it. Don't forget to bring both of your wallets just in case.
There are no jobs when it comes to dating and courtship
People who think like that aren't worth dating
Lmao why am I the only guy who agreed
@ItzYaboi I think it's obvious that most guys feel like there is pressure on them to do these things and here's a woman taking it for granted as if it's "natural."
Job sounds a bit ehh...
in my opinion it's nice if both treat each other well and have fun regardless of conventional rules, if there is feeling then you don't have to feel forced to do something, buuut! It really depends like, for me it was a bit different because it was me pursuing him and I had to do stuff to make him fall for me ❤
It's a bit cowardish to ask a question anonymously and then say most answers are triggered, they are just answers...
Maybe the purpose of the asker was to trigger? Maybe that is the reason why he sees the answers that way...
The women’s job is to avoid guys like you. No sane female wants to date a man with your outlook on dating. It’s not a “job.” If you don’t want to date then don’t. Your attitude sucks.
He didn't use the right term, but I wish you would be more comprehensible. I am a french speaker and I don't know for him, but sometimes we are just short in vocabulary.
Are you him?
No, I am not. If I was him, you would not see my name.
I think his portrayal of the question could have used some work, but I think he might genuinely just be trying to understand dating as a whole. We all start somewhere. I've enjoyed your perspective on other topics so I definitely wouldn't mind your opinion here. In my view, dating definitely isn't a job, I wouldn't want to do it if it were. Dating is supposed to be fun, and can be, but often we complicate it by associating roles to each gender so to speak.
I completely agree with you Pegases.
I wouldn't call it a job but it definitely takes work
When I dated I never left all the work up to the guy. I’ve made plans, paid, looked pretty AND did the asking. If I were to use my own experience couldn’t I be asking him the same question? Yes I think the asker is complicating his question.
His wording is off putting. It’s not his English that’s the problem. Nice try.
Yes dating takes work on BOTH sides.
Should a guy be doing these things if he wants a girl to like him?
Should a girl be doing nothing if she wants a guy to like her?
You can just tell such angry comments come from a grumpy girl - yeah, the guy that asked that question probably was thinking about someone like you.
@pink1980 You tell me, that's the original question being put to you here.
I already stated my answer.
I’m not grumpy. I’m more then confident sorry to disappoint.
You didn't answer it though, you deflected onto the asker with an ad hominem. You also deflected my question by asking your own and going in a circle.
If you think the expectations or "jobs" are the same then say so and argue that point.
The end result of the question doesn’t apply to me. I did answer the question a few replies back. I don’t wait for a man to approach me. If I’m inserted I’ll ask a guy out, I’ll make the plans, pay and still look pretty. I didn’t reflect nor answer in a circle. Anything else?
That to me sounds like another deflection. If it wasn't you would have simply said it as answer, not attacked the asker first.
No my answer was based on the fact that I’m opinionated. I read the question as rude and insinuating women don’t do their “job” in the dating game. If the asker wanted a less hostile answer he should have thought before he used the word job.
Stop being pissy boys and except the fact that I disagree with the question.
This is definitely a disagreement, but there no reason we can't agree to disagree respectfully.
Ok. I can do that.
I kind of like your attitudinal response @pink1980
@ernest1 Thanks.
UWC.
Your *interpretation* was that it was rude. It's not up to the asker to police how you interpret the word "job." Get past the semantics and get to the fundamentals.
Also, you were under no obligation to be "hostile" in response and it doesn't mean you can't still provide a meaningful answer -- you could pontificate on the topic instead of being dismissive. Basically it's a pointless excuse, but whatever. Small potatoes.
More importantly. So offense was taken at the idea that "women don't do their 'job' in the dating game"? Okay, that's interesting, so you're suggesting they *are* doing their "job," whatever it is? We would love to hear the details about that; that's the fundamental point of the question after all.
Is this your question?
It's not my question but I'd like to hear the answers.
I’m flattered you value my opinion. Go ahead and read my answer a few comments back. If you’re still not satisfied I’m not sure what to tell you.
Your answer seemed to be that you'd do everything that a guy would. Okay, but I don't think you're reflective of most women in that respect, no?
So a guy who's obviously not happy with his dating life asks a question in a disappointed tone - and you slap him as response? Because that is supportive, right, and you're such a nice person?
And besides, if you take the guy's role (as described in the question) - why not just respond - initially - with 'not all girls are like that, I pay for my own dates etc.'
Why do you feel the need to dismiss/attack him - in his own forum post?
I will definitely approach a guy if i like him and want to know him.
And about paying for dates i believe we should just pay for our own food. And i would never want the guy to pay for me and be in debt to him.
Only if you feel you are.
It's the man's job to ask and pay for yes.
After that it's pretty well the same. To talk, and get to know each other to see if there is a reason to spend more time together or say goodnight and move on.
Dating isn't hard! Lol
Take it from me, leave the old rules (bs) behind you. A man loves a woman who's considerate and not self centered and selfish. The more consideration you show the more generosity and kindness you'll receive from a gentleman. Not asking you to pay the whole bills but offer to pay or insist to split the bill (s). Always contribute but give him the chance if he wants to spoil you. Relationships are a teamwork, it's not adoption or free service.
for me personally i want girls to show interest in me and manitain that interest til the find out what kind of a guy i am, a lot of girls dont even show interest and expect guys to read their mind, or withdraw their interest the moment a guy says hi and start the shit tests..
its simple show me you want me
Keep the guy happy, stay loyal and fulfill his needs.
no one should have a job while in the relationship. the only job is to support and respect each other.
A woman worth keeping doesn't treat dating like that. You want a teammate in your life. Not someone that uses you