In most relationships which one actually makes the first move? (Girls vs Guys)?

Sorry to make this heteronormative. I used to always think it was the guy that made the first move, but most relationships of people that I know personally, it seems as though the girl is the one that initiated a relationship. The guy seems to not have a clue if the girl is into him and maybe shy’s away, whereas if the girl REALLY likes them they will say something. Have we been misinformed over the years?
VOTE and explain!

  • Girls make the first move
    Vote A
  • Guys make the first move
    Vote B
Select age and gender to cast your vote:
I'm a GirlI'm a Guy

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Girls play mind games, that's what slows guys minds down, you are very indirect, it would be the guy 100% of the time if girls would actually show their interest instead of just talking to their friends about it

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    • Lmao you right 😂 honestly it sucks like we don’t know if the guy is interested or not if they stop talking to us enough or whatever so we don’t wanna bother them? At least that’s how it is for me rn cuz I made the first move

    • Cuz like we grew up being told “if a guy really likes you he will do whatever he can to be with you.” But like... how will he know?

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 16

  • Girls need to make the first move more that's for sure! While there are some guys that don't like it, most would LOVE it! As for guys "not having a clue", this is because women are often TOO subtle about it. We notice, but if you leave room for doubt, we will doubt it (as would you).

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  • Mostly guys. Its weird. My generation was never taught how to do this sort of thing. We are normally taught by porn and what we might overhear from our peers, maybe a little from trial and error. In a world like that, sometimes girls need to take the stand. Whether it be dropping bigger hints, making themselves more approachable or physically getting up and doing the approaching.

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  • Most of the time guys make the first move and it generally is seen as a must that the guy makes the first move which I personally think really really sucks...

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  • Guys usually make the first move, but that's the girls who actually give the signal that it's ok for us to make it

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    • Ah but see, even with that, girls are sneaky that way. They make the first move quietly by being a little flirty or cheeky or whatever. Or we’ll add them on social media and look cute or something. We usually spot the guy first in public and make ourselves noticeable to the guy but pretend we don’t see him etc.

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    • Ugh meanwhile I was left on read by a guy I was kinda talking to casually (same guy I was talking about) so I’m gonna take it as he’s not interested in me. It’s frustrating but yeah I guess I got my answer I doubt it’s just cuz he’s “busy”.

    • I’m sorry!! I know how that feels but I’ve never tried dating sites. My experiences were in real life situation. Best of luck <3

  • Normally it is that guys make the first move, but in our modern day a majority of girls like to "play hard to get" or do mind games with guys and I think it's become so off-putting that success isn't a clear cut outcome that guys just can't be bothered so they give up and wait for the girl to make a move

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  • I can't really cast a vote, I have asked and been asked so it's more of a mutual thing I think. I've always asked more than been asked though so an opinion I'd think that guys ask but that doesn't leave out the possibility of a successful relationship from a girl asking

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  • In all but one of the relationships I've been in I've been the one to make the first move. But I think that the one who normally is the less shy about it, is the one who's gonna be making the first move.

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  • tinder matches never make the first move i wish they did tho and in relationship i always did

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    • Lol I’m making the first move with a tinder match but outside of it. Haven’t messaged them in a week though cuz it’s only been small talk and they are busy doing something

  • yeah, my girlfriend is actually the one who makes the first move... and she even asked me if I want to be her boyfriend and I said yes hahahhaa 'cause I had a crush on her and now we're 1 year and 2 months relationship 😊😊😊

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  • Guys make the first move

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  • i would wait for the girl make the first move.

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  • I wish it was the other way around, but men are the ones who make the first move, usually

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  • Guys unfortunately. Girls step it up a bit... ha

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  • Guys still make the first move usually, girls just accept or reject and allow him to initiate

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  • Depends on the situations

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  • relationships are total trash and a waste of time.

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What Girls Said 10

  • Traditionally men have been forced to make the first move, and sadly the tradition continues to this day. I don't know any girls who have made the first move.

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    • I did. But I’m talking to a guy who seems to be very shy or just busy. I’ve been left on read a couple times if he didn’t see the message for a few hours but other than that when I just do some small talk he’ll write something back and he knows I think he’s cute and we matched on Tinder. It’s hard going out of your comfort zone but because guys do it all the time I don’t mind and am just being patient. And yeah I know a few couples where the girl initiated it and usually they started off ad kind of friends

    • Oh, well. I know plenty who had made the first move on dating platforms like Tinder. I just don't know anyone who has done so in real life. Even I've made the first move on Tinder. The app makes it easy.

    • I messaged him on Snapchat. We matched like two months ago but I thought I’d talk to him pretty recently (we go to the same Uni) so when I told him I thought he was cute he was surprised and I was like “Oh we matched on Tinder btw!” 😂😅 so yeah to him I was a total stranger messaging him for like a week until I said that

  • I think the majority is guys, but I wouldn't let that stop you (Or any other girl) from making the first move. I did and it turned out great.

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  • I think girls make the first move in letting a guy know they're open to something but usually the guy asks the girl out from what I've seen

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  • Does it matter... we are in 2018!

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  • I have hard four major relationships. In two the guy made the move in the other two I did

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  • Guys

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  • My experience is about 50/50.

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  • Depends what you consider a first move ;)
    We went to see a movie together and I immediately lifted the armrest that separated us while he made the move for our first kiss (which was hours later).

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  • Usually guys.

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  • I think it's better for the guy to make the first move.

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