So this guy has been texting me all the time and really showing signs that he likes me. Earlier last month he invited me to go out with him for a meal and to the cinema.. at the time I wasn't sure if I liked him so I decided to go thinking meeting him alone might help sort out my head and decide if I truly like him. Anyway after this "date" I decided he wasn't for me and frankly I thought he'd be put off me because I'm extremely outgoing and chatty whereas he's extremely shy and reserved. However at the end of the day he gave me a lovely box of chocolates and text me immediately after he'd left asking if I'd got on the right train and saying what a great day he'd had. At this point I wanted to tell him that I didn't really think a relationship would be right but I thought I'd hang on and see if his messages died down. Anyway they didn't and he's been constantly messaging me since asking to meet up and asking if he can introduce me to his parents and constantly saying what a good couple we'd make. Now we're not an official couple and I don't want to sound presumptive but it's rather obvious he wants to be more than friends. I feel it's partly my fault as I've somewhat lead him on but now it's out of hand and I need to put a stop to it before he gets even more hurt. I feel so awful because he's the most lovely genuine guy I've ever met and he seems to genuinely really like me (his friends have said he's basically head over heels for me!!) so I don't know what to do! I don't want to hurt him by keep going with it but ultimately having to reject him but with him already lacking in confidence I don't want to knock him even more.. does anyone have any ideas how I can tell him gently and not come over as totally selfish and horrible? And help would be massively appreciated! X
Most Helpful Guy
You seem pretty proactive in finding a perfect guy for you. (Trying to put some hunour in it, that didn't work anyway haha).
I have tried dating a few girls and faced failures till now. These girls never rejected my proposal directly and kept me guessing and making my own assumptions. This killed my huge amount of time. On the contrary, there was this girl which was very special for me. Yeah, I loved her a lot but that isn't the only reason why i can't forget her. She said it right to my face that she doesn't like me. For the next 1 month I cried. Only cried. Then something hit me. She was too straight forward to me. She immediately given me her decision. It was clear that she had no feelings for me.
I still like her and respect her for being straightforward to me.
Now coming to you. Just meet him in person and tell him humbly what are differences you two have and how your relationship might now work. Don't be overly sweet to him so that he will start liking you even more.
BONUS ADVICE-Be who are you and improve yourself. Regardless of what people have to say to put you down.0
Most Helpful Girl
Just be honest and tell him everything. Not in parts but the whole story. Yes it will hurt him a bit but trust me it's better than listening to parts and then questioning yourself on what you did wrong. Also don't directly say you want to be friends because that will give him some hope to try again. Just ask him if he can be around you despite knowing you don't want a relationship? I think you will get your answer and he will get less hurt.5