Should I stop talking to an old mate, or should I stick to my guns and risk losing my girlfriend?

Recently this girl I used to like and she used to like me got back in contact with me. We met years ago on Internet but never for real. We lost contact as soon as I met Philippa who then became my girlfriend we have now been together two and half years. This girl got back in contact with me and we talk like old mates Philippa doesn't see it this way thinks there is something going on so I show her all the messages that girl sent me and all the ones I sent back yet Philippa tells me to choose. So I said no cause to me it's choosing between an old friend and my girlfriend it's not right I don't think to choose cause the feeling for this girl are 100% not there anymore for me or for when I said no Philippa broke up with me then I took her back and now she keeps telling me to choose or she'll leave me. I'm going through a rough time and it's nice to have people to talk to cause I just found out a family member has cancer and it's too late to operate so I feel lost and lonely and could do with my girlfriend supporting me but instead she's banging on about this girl when I don't need more stress I need people to talk I being the one in the wrong should I stop talking to this girl who to me is an old mate or should I stick to my guns and risk losing my gf? X


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  • Next time you text with your girlfriend, see if your girlfriend is willing to read the message and compose the response together. If so just talk to this old friend as a couple; if not, is it because Phillippa cannot give you the kind of emotional support you need? If that is the case you need to examine your relationship with Phillipa.

  • It's a tough one. I'm the girlfriend in this situation. My boyfriend has been friends with his female friend for 15 years and 9 of those, was before me. I respect that they are friends and really like her actually, but their closeness makes me worry at times... Sticky situation. But I would never expect him to choose.

    • Thing is I show her all the texts so there is no need for her to worry she is my world and I'd never hurt her I've not hurt her in the past like cheatin and I won't start now just wish she would understand that x

    • Then if she is your world as you say, perhaps still keep in touch from time to time but tone down the texting and contact and make your g friend feel like she is number one.

  • get rid of the other girl.. Don't stress when a girl worries too much, worry when she starts not giving a f***... If you love this girl ... the heck with the other, but that's just my opinion.

    • Thanks just need other peoples oppinion x

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    • I've never done wrong by her ever. In the past she has Hirt me a lot she talked to her ex behind my back then broke up with me for her,we got back together and she lied to me countless amount of if anyone can't be trusted it's not me x

    • Then if your girlfriend did all that and you can't trust her than why are you with her? you need to choose between one of them quit stringing them along.