What’s going on for real?

So I’ve been dating this dude for a little over 5 months. He barley texts me back. He will say like” this feels like a face to face or over the phone conversation”. Then he won’t answer my calls. He says he’ll call me, then he doesn’t. I wouldn’t be mad but this isn’t the first time this has happened. He disappoints me all the time. We were supposed to hang out for my birthday and we ended up going to a bar ( not a fan of bars) and going to his buddies house to... well I’m not 420 friendly either. Then there ends up being this big deal where a buddy of his owes him money and it’s... let’s just say it scared me okay to the point where i didn’t feel safe, so i left. I just feel like he doesn’t appreciate me in any way. II feel like I’m giving this relationship my all and he just wants me around when it’s convenient for him. I feel used. I feel unwanted and honestly I’ve had it. It’s come to Jesus time and I don't know what to say honestly. We’ve had conversations about this before and he’s like “don’t think your feelings aren’t reciprocated.” Well every action that you’ve taken in regards to me makes me feel that way. He says I’m insecure, honestly I just feel like he sucks at relationships. I’m the one always asking to hang out, I’m the one going to his house, I’m the one paying for things, I’m the one trying to get a kiss or meet for lunch or go out on a date. He came into this relationship very broke... not just monetarily but emotionally. He tried to end his life after his fiancé left him. That happened, there was photographic proof. My thing is he gave so much of himself to these other girls, not just the fiancé but I’ve seen how he was with other girls, I don’t get a fraction of that affection, even though when I confront him he says it’s there, when I’m mad at him he’s loving. Wtf? I don’t understand how he treats me this way and I treat him like absolute gold. He doesn’t deserve the way I treat him actually. But I love him, and that means I stay, no matter what. Help.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Sounds like your desperate. And you are willing to put up with blatant uninterest and frankly a guy with little potential. Just to be in a relationship. Any relationship. You dont love this guy. Every action of his shows his indifference. Every action of yours shows blind devotion. For what? He brings nothing to the table. Move on girl. There is someone out there for you without the baggage

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    • I honestly know. I want things to work out with him. I could have dated this engineer who was way into me, I’m not going to make a case for him, but when I confront him about it he acts like he does care. He confuses the living hell out of me.

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    • Well sounds like you are hopeless. You dont want to hurt him, but are willing to consistently be hurt by him. And yet you are willing to stay in the relationship. No one can help you then. You will continue this unfifilling relationship either until ge finally dumps you or you come to your senses. Good luck

    • Yeah... that’s the only way I see it ending too.

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What Guys Said 4

  • Uh no

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  • Ask him about his "emotional well". If he has given much to other ladies, his well may have difficulty refilling.
    After my fiance destroyed me, I lived in a bottle for a year and a half and disconnected from most people. He may still be in recovery.

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    • That’s how I feel about it. Maybe he’s given so much of himself it’s hard to want to do that all again to have it broken but if he doesn’t ever try he’s not ever gonna get that meaningful relationship he wants. You can’t give the bare minimum to keep someone around and expect to make something great out of it.

  • You love him even if he does that shit? Well.. i dont want to get into your life but if you want things to continue that way for the rest of your life then well, suit yourself..

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    • Yeah.. I guess that what I’m afraid of, he says that he’s “ worth it in the long run” and that I’ll really feel like an ass when I find out how well he treats a girl. Do you even believe that? Wtf dude.

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    • Think well about it. And decide whats best for you.

    • What’s best for me? Simple, leave him and go back to dating. That’s the problem when you’re in love with someone though, you don’t just think about yourself anymore

  • sometime... self respect is greater than love... he is not worth you... leave him.. you deserve some one better then him

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    • I think he has me waiting because of the way he was treated before but honestly I’m starting to think he is the reason those other relationships didn’t work out...

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