Wouldn't it be his place to follow-up?

So I recently matched with a guy on tinder and asked him if he wanted to meet up for drinks sometime. He agreed, and we are supposed to see each other this weekend. Is it safe to assume that if he's interested he will reach out to me to confirm the plans since I already made the first move?

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Don't ever assume anything with a guy. It is impossible to know where his head is at. You might need to take the lead on this one because you suggested it in the first place. I would wait a few days and see if he brings it up. If he doesn't it doesn't mean that he isn't interested, he might just not want to appear pushy or desperate, or maybe he is shy and is going to let you take control this time because he is unsure of what you want. If you feel like he isn't going to make any plans ask him if you are still on for this week to "remind him", and if he is unsure or doesn't know, just go ahead and make plans "with him" by offering up suggestions. That way he will feel like he has had some say and contributed to planning you date.

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    • Ugh. You have a good point.. that's my worry, that he genuinely is interested but won't reach out:/ it's so hard because this is the first time I have ever initiated anything first so I don't want to be annoying, but I also realize guys can be completely clueless in a lot of situations.. I need a mind reader haha

    • Unfortunately a lot of guys have a problem making decisions. Especially if he is really interested in you and is afraid to blow it. I would wait and see if he comes to you about it. If not then there is no harm in asking him if he still wants to go out with You, and when you ask have a suggestion of where to go like... "I was thinking maybe we could go here or maybe here? Have you ever been?" And "this day and this day at this time work for Me, what works for You?" but ask if that is ok or if he has a better idea. Giving him little suggestions without sounding like you have planned out your whole date will help him along if he has been thinking about it and has his own ideas, and now that your ideas are out he might give you his own, because you have "broke the ice". If he just jumps at your ideas then thats great too, because you know he is nervous and just wants to please you. Which can be very cute ;)

    • I agree that would be sweet if he had thought that far! I'm just worried he forgot or is hoping I don't say anything so he can get out of it. But I'll probably just put it out there so I know for sure. Good advice!

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  • Yea he should reach out to confirm the plans but since you reached out first he might expect you to do the same about confirming the plans

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    • I don't want to seem clingy though.. And if he's interested I feel like he would. I'm kind of nervous it will fall through but I also realize if he can't even confirm plans he won't be able to follow through on anything..

    • Ya if he can't do something simple like confirm plans then your probably better off but who knows he might reach out so keep a look out

  • That's seems reasonable.

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    • Right? I think so too.. so if he doesn't reach out is it safe to assume he's not interested?

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    • Consider, that rejection is common, and it doesn't mean you are less in any way. Be a duck, and let the water slide off your back, if he says no. You are more than a question, and more than an answer. Infinitely more, and more important.

    • That's a really good way to view it. I think being "ugly" growing up has made me hypersensitive to my looks even now so whenever something doesn't work out I assume it's because of that when in reality it could be so many other things.

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