How do I make amends with a guy friend I rejected a month ago (Read description!)?

We've been acquaintances for 3 years and we've been really good friends these past few months. He would happily talk to me and joke around with me between classes at school. I noticed he would start to go out of his way to find me and talk to me as often as he could. Many of our friends noticed this, too, and teased him about it, but he didn't seem to mind. In December, he confessed that he had feelings for me and asked me directly if I requited similar feelings. I was shocked and stuttered out an honest "no" with an apologetic trail of mumbled words afterwards. He said "it's ok" and walked away. I texted him later that same day, apologizing and asking if he was really okay and if we could still be friends. He said he might need some space (this also happened to be the day before winter break) but that we could still be friends. When break was over, he avoided me like the plague. I let him, assuming he still needed space. A couple days went by, I spotted him in the hallway periodically and I smiled and said hi. This has been going on for over a month now. He winces and pretends not to see or hear me everytime. I feel awful. I didn't mean to hurt him that bad.
I know it probably sounds selfish of me to want my friend back, but I also really want some closure. I really don't want to have to spend the rest of high school with him awkwardly avoiding me. We have a lot of friends in common so it has become a concern for other people as well.
Sorry for the long explanation... also, please don't yell at me for my past mistakes. I'd just like some advice about what to do about this and what to know for future reference in case something similar happens again.
(I'm very shy and I have no dating experience so go easy on me please)


Most Helpful Guy

  • You don't want him back as a friend. If he's avoiding you now, clearly the friendship was one-sided.
    Keep your head up and move on


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What Girls & Guys Said

  • I think (could be wrong) after reading what you wrote what caused this problem is when 'your friends teased him about you were nice and talked to him so he started to like you more. So he thought you might feel the same about him so he asked you out you said no. So now he thinks you and friends did this on purpose or he himself is embarrassed and think you will look at him different

    • How do I fix it, though? I don't want him to be embarrassed about this. I never teased him; it was mostly just that his closest guy friends pointed out how he acted like he liked me (which he did).

    • Be honest with him and say something like this (but fix the English) "hey remember when you asked me out and I automatically said no then you left. I started to think more about what you said and wished I had said maybe or yes, because you are a vey sweet kind guy who I really really enjoy. I love being friends with you and talking to you, because you make me smile and happy just being around you. I really need you as my friend and then the more and more we get to know each the closer we will be to a (raise you voice a little) REAL date." Well something like this. Good luck and hope you are able to fix it. Smile and enjoy life

  • You're going to have to loose him as Friend. Those feelings he has for you will not go away. And seeing you. Will bring up those feelings of you and the pain of you rejecting him.

  • Eventually the awkwardness will go away.


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