If you ask a girl out and she says "I don't know" but at the same time is very flustered about it, is all hope lost?

Hey all,

So I want make a disclaimer saying that its likely a 95% chance that she just isn't interested. I get that. I just wanted to hear some opinions.

So hear's what happened, I basically went up to her and asked her if she'd like to grab a coffee this weekend. An additional detail I'd like to add is that she comes across as someone doesn't seem to have done too much regarding dating (I don't mean this in a negative connotation, I just mean it in a way that perhaps she hasn't really gone through any experiences exploring that, even for me the only experience I have with dating is rejection). However, the thing is we don't really know each other - overall it's been two encounters and casual conversation.

Her answer was basically suddenly feeling pressured to answer on the spot (I recall a lot of "uh's"), suddenly worried about the timing of it all for this weekend (I am aware of the adage that if she really wanted to, she would have made time anyways) and generally seemed confused to what (I thought at least) should have been a yes or no question. I even gave her an easy out by telling her "you can say no if you don't want to" to which she replied that that would have been too mean (not really but that's a difference in opinion). She was also amongst her own peers (who were luckily distracted by something else and didn't entirely catch was happening in front of them) which probably didn't help much. To be honest, if I did make her feel too much on the spot I feel kinda bad but at the same time I had no other option.

My main question is really - do you think that it was more that she wasn't expecting to be asked out and got a bit flustered? Or just flat-out uninterested? It could also be both, I am just curious as to what other people think.

Best,

rock34

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  • She felt uncomfortable because he wasn't expecting you to approach her. Give her some time and occasionally talk to her.

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