Do you have to be really thick-skinned for online dating?

My friends kept pressuring me to sign up for online dating so I bit the bullet. Geez!! How thick skinned do you have to be?
I got 70 likes in one day, zero messages. I figured why not be proactive so I messaged 3 guys. None replied to me.
It's been 2 days and I give up! I will be alone forever!

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Most Helpful Girl

  • You need to be able to cope with rejection well. And If you have low self-esteem online dating is the wrong place to look for love or dates. Also, you need to be highly perceptive too , because there's many predators , trolls and catfish on dating sites. So you need to be able to determine how sincere a person is

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Um okay be patient. As an unattractive guy I'm used to only get a couple of matches a month.

    I made a dating profile about 2 weeks ago, reckon I've messaged about 200 people including fatties and only just had my first date from it today. So yeah don't worry it could be worse.

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    • why u so sure that u r an attractive guy?

    • Show All
    • @girlinthemirror It is on a dating site where everyone just goes by looks.

    • This is happening after the first date, I'm not talking about in the early msging phase.

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What Girls & Guys Said

822
  • Online dating has some significant disadvantages vis-a-vis doing everything in 3D. Off the top of my head:
    -It's harder to evaluate someone as a potential date or girlfriend than it is someone you meet in person, especially someone you have semi-regular/regular contact with
    -People are in contact with huge numbers of other people, so it is difficult to stand out or get significant attention from someone like you can if you meet them in 3D
    -Communication is more difficult and you're basically operating in a fog. As you experienced, people often won't communicate in any depth.
    What I've found works for me is filtering out anyone who can't bother to write a proper description of what they're looking for and give some idea of what their interests are. I don't place much emphasis on looks, if at all, because they'll only rarely look as good as their photo, anyway.

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  • You really do. You're throwing yourself out there in a sea of people who want a variety of things. You don't know what you're going to catch, and there's slim chances you'll find someone you'll date.
    But there's a chance so it could be worth it to get a chance at finding the right guy.
    Till then you just have to deal with ghosters, "hey"s, creepy guys, and convos that make you realize you're not really interested. I can only wish you the best of luck

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  • I have to be pretty thick skinned. I tossed messages into the ether, void, abyss... what ever you wanna call it! Gotten a few replies, one girl strait up wanted nothing to do with me. oddly enough I found half way decent change from the girls that don't reply at all. Other than that I have chatted with one other girl was ghosted after two days.

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    • quitting after two day? hell you could have the horror stories that some of the other women seem to be talking about. I've been on 4 different sites for maybe a year? I've had no luck, you an take it a little longer.

  • It's worth the effort. Not at all that you won't get your load of " Just not your type " you will. I have had only 2.5 good Meetings occur. There are men pretending to be women, women pretending to be men or the One's who identify as an Aardvark, but to each their own, ok. However, this mentioned horror will happen to you as well. " Beware " Just don't be afraid not to give it a whirl.

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  • It is often like that. You have to wait a while until people start messaging you. You can't expect messages straight away. Tinder is your best bet

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  • lol online dating is the worst. surprised not one of the 70 messaged you, but sometimes you have to wait. give it time, they will flood you with messages

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  • If you think it's tough being female on those sites, try being male. A lot of them are mostly males. You rarely have women ever message you and you get maybe 3% reply back to your messages

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  • You can date me don't use that app.
    I also got some likes but never get reply😂
    It's worst thing i guess.
    (Sorry if you feel bad about my dating option)

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  • That surprises me, I always assumed that girls got a ton of messages. 24 hours is not a long time. I am on a couple of dating sites but usually only check them out once a week or less.

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  • You want to give up after just 2 days. What were you expecting? Not everything in life will go the way you want it to.

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  • Gave it 2 days... lol. yep your right you will be single forever.

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  • You won't be alone forever stop it. Yeah this online dating seems like when you get a catalog in the mail read it mark pages then half yr later find it under a bunch of bills piled on the table

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  • Don't give up Anonymous.
    I think you're looking at this all wrong. It's not that you have to be thick skinned, it's that you have to prevent yourself from attaching too much hope, too soon. You're playing with high stakes when you invest yourself in the outcome of poking a random bunch of unknown people. You're taking things far too personal much too early.

    Look at it with a sense of humor and "whatever happen happens (or not)". First when you've landed a date and met a couple of times it may be apt to start attaching a little more hope in what can come.
    (not being able to lose one's guard even when it's time is another dating problem).

    For comparison. Look at guys who are actually successful at finding great women to date. What's their secret? It's that in the beginning they never care how it goes. They wade through dozens of rejections and barely even notice.

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  • Hell no you font.. Just be yourself eventually when time will come you will meet your love

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  • Na. I just avoid people who put emphasis on photos as a form of attraction

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  • One day? Are you kidding me? After a couple of months you can give up.

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  • Yeah... I've been on tinder for a couple months now... no likes whatsoever. Doesn't help that I'm in a small town though.

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  • When I did online dating, I reached out to the guys. Just send a simple hello and ask "What's your favorite artist?"

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  • Could you please Update sendind the pic of your profile soo we can understand better?

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  • I have tried a lot of online dating platforms. Some I've had a lot of attention others not so much.
    It takes more than just one platform to find one which works for you.
    I have one that I get plenty of guys chatting to me and I've been on many dates from it.
    Yet another platform which is more popular across everyone, I cannot get a conversation going at all to save my life.
    Find one you find easy to use and is right for you. There are so many out there and you don't need thick skin you just need to realise that there is horrid people out there and run with it.

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  • online dating
    you should just be kind and smart
    I really wanna someone online

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  • You give up soooo easy... you barely even tried

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  • it helps.

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  • Never give up!!!

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  • No doesn't matter tbh it depends on you

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  • No messeges is better than messages from such "guys", who tatally not ur type
    Girls, Would u be interested in any of this guys? ↗

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    • Look let's be real. I seen your post. U only getting dudes who find u attractive so it must mean u aren't that attractive. You women want the cake but eat it too. Be honest with yourself. The guys u want find u hideous and deplorable. Sorry LMAO. With an attitude like that and your a woman using tinder in your physical prime lol u just ugly

    • @theJuiceOjAye
      whats wrong, ugly rejected dude, another girl rejected u bcoz of ur fu king ugliness?

  • Takes ages, a lot of fake accounts to get you hooked with likes but stick it out decent guys are around

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  • Within an hour I received a few messages and matches. Found 2 great sweet guys.

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  • You must be ugly then lol. No-one feels sorry for a woman considering dating is way easier for them. Do something with yo old ass. If u ain't married yet doubt anyone will

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    • LMAO cry me a river.

  • I guess you either have to be thick skinned or just patient. A two day drought isn't an indication that you'll be alone forever though.

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