Should I ask a guy out on a second date, even if I am the only one texting first?

Not sure if my question makes sense, but I went on a date with a guy 2 weeks ago and I thought we hit it off great. We went out for drinks and it wasn't awkward and we even made plans to see each other again. We hugged in the end and I reminded him he has my number and is always welcome tor each out.

However, since then, he hasn't texted me. I texted him first just as a quick check in and see how his week's been. He replied and then asked how mine was, which I responded back. He did not continue the conversation though. Then 2 days after, I texted him again and made an inside joke from what happened on our first date. Again, he responded but did not continue the conversation.

Before our first date, he texted me pretty consistently. Has he lost interest after the first date? Or do you think he doesn't know I am interested and I should ask him out again for lunch or something simple? Or am I really oblivious and should just move on...


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Most Helpful Guy

  • This guy sounds just like me. I don't text. I find it awkward.
    When I was trying to get my future wife to go on a second date, I could not bring myself to call her. Instead, I was hanging around her building for hours until I "accidentally" bumped into her and ask her on a date. Been happily married for over 20 years... She still can't get me. to text...

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    • But the guy she was with was texting her consistenly before the first date. Meaning, he doesn't have the social problem that you have, right?

      Anyway, congrats on the 20 years, what a cute love story!

    • Show All
    • It was on a different day.

Most Helpful Girl

  • Personally my pride would’ve been so hurt the first time, I wouldn’t have even text him the second time 😅, judging from what you’re saying I feel like if he really enjoyed your date then he would have asked to see you again, or at least suggested he wanted to? I honestly don’t think there’s any excuse, it doesn’t take 2 minutes to send a Text, my boyfriend sends me an emoji when he’s too busy to talk, but it’s just so I know 🤷🏾‍♀️I think maybe you should not text him first or ask to see him again for like two weeks and if he doesn’t make effort to communicate with you in those two weeks then you know what’s up, this is a two way street don’t cross oceans for a guy who won’t even jump a puddle for you, you’re better than this boo, x

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    • Thank you for your comment! And you are right, I guess I'm just trying to stay in denial, haha. But yes, I'm just going to let this go and move on. Thanks again!

    • Be strong, you got this 💪🏾

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 14

  • Putting myself in the guy's shoes, you should probably move on. He's either not interested, or is hiding something (like he's in a relationship or something)

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  • It sounds like he isn't interested in continuing the relationship. People will generally let you know how they are feeling either with chatter or by silence.

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  • I can understand you like him a lot but still you got to keep your desperstion hidden otherwise it will lower your value in his eyes. Control the supply and demand a little to keep the charm

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  • From a guys perspective, if i like someone and what to see them, I make reasonable efforts to make that happen.

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  • Of course. Just make sure you keep him talking about what gets him excited the most

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  • I wouldn't pursue it, I'm my opinion I don't think he is interested. If he were then he would at least put effort into the conversation.

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  • No. You should not because he likely doesn't have time for you or isn't interested in you the same way you are interested in him.

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  • If you want a second date ask, worst thing is he says no

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  • He's not interested he's only responding to be cordial

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  • No. He is either too busy or doesn't seem interested.

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  • Signs of disinterest

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  • Haha he's playin you

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  • Save your energy men into u always text u first.

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  • Jus ask him out... if he's not interested... jus carry. On with your life.. there are more men out there..

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What Girls Said 8

  • I think he lost interest but talk to him and try your luck anyway

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  • go ahead and ask him out. if he responds great, if not move on. this way you tried and there's no ambiguity :)

    i prefer to choose the path of least confusion.

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  • If you're not serious about him, end it. If you are, who cares whose texting first? If you personally suspect he is not interested, then ask him to call you immediately because you two have to talk. Nobody knows what he is really thinking. We're not him. Therefore YOU have to ask him if he's interested or not. This is your dating life. Not ours. You have to remember now that both of you are adults, and therefore you will tend to lead demanding and busy lives. And even if he is not busy. If he is not interested in speaking now, he's just not. Don't make him a priority. But let him know where you stand. Don't define your relationship based on what everybody else does.

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  • Dont text him again. Clearly he doesn't want to hurt you and he can't tell you openly. Better move on, I am sure you deserve better and you should be with someone who equally care you.

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  • He kinda sounds like he’s not interested anymore. Kinda like the thrill is gone and he’s just responding to be polite.

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  • It seems that he's not interested, if he really was interested, he would actually engage with you in a conversation

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  • My guess would be he isn't interested, sorry

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  • Just like someone else said, he's not interested and he's just being polite by responding, not only has he not texted you first since your date but he doesn't even continue the conversation, if you really want to ask him for another date go ahead, it's brave of you to put your pride aside to show someone you like them and maybe another date will give him another chance to get to know you a little better, and give you the chance to see things clearer and get a better idea of whether or not you should stop pursing and contacting him all together.

    BUT with that being said I wouldn't advice you to ask him for another date, I would actually say just stop contacting him because sometimes putting yourself out there continuously for someone who shows no interest puts you in the position to get played and used.

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