My last serious relationship was 5 years ago. My last partner and I split bc he was violent and abusive to me. We have 2 children together and they see him regular. I have healed and get on ok with my ex considering everything. I’ve learnt to be friendly for the children sake but would never go back with him.
He has been in a relationship pretty much since we split but he does still text me inappropriately sometimes.
I've met a new man and we haven’t yet discussed our ex’s. I want to be totally open with him about my ex but don’t want to put him off.
Some people might think I’m damaged goods.
If you met someone and they told you they had a abusive ex partner would you be put off?
Most Helpful Guy
No I wouldn't be put off. And not just because I've been on the worse end of a violent abusive relationship. If I like someone I'll want to be with them. We all have out baggage and hang ups after all.
It is something which I think does need to be discussed fairly early though, especially if the ex in question is still in your life due to the kids. Just so it doesn't become an uncomfortable question of withheld information down the line. You dont need to give the full horrible details if you dont want to. Just outline it in broad brushstrokes, and give him time to process it slowly and ask questions.
And you know sometimes a relationship can do a hell of a job helping you heal from that sort of trauma, even if it doesn't work out. It did for me.2THIS IS NOT RELEVANT ANYMORE
Most Helpful Girl
I have been in an abusive relationship and my experience is no, it makes no difference to men. I havr only told two but they were good men and it made no difference to them. Of course you have to show you have moved on, love yourself again and not sit and talk about your ex for hours - just like in a “normal” relationship.0THIS IS NOT RELEVANT ANYMORE