Should the past be forgotten?

I'm in a relationship with someone who can't let go of the fact that he is not my first. I had a boyfriend before him and it bothers him for some reason.
Should he just move on or is he right for making me feel bad about it?

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Most Helpful Guy

  • The more boyfriends you have, the less desirable you will be. Maybe just cut your losses and try to make it work with this one? If he dislikes promiscuity he could make a good husband... a guy likes it when you only think of him when you think of romance and sex, not that 'other guy' who's penis was inside you before him. This may be a biological mechanism to ensure you aren't raising somebody else's kid and therefore wasting resources not propagating your genes. In any case, it's not wrong that he feels this way, the question is, can he get over it and move forward with you? Can you admit that your first relationship was a mistake or are you one of those 'its all meant to be' types? True there is a lesson in everything, but some aren't the best value in terms of what teachings should cost. Less penises, more prospects, remember that

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I never got that. He can't let go of what exactly? Of the fact that you weren't locked up in your castle sitting by the window day and night waiting for him to come?

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What Guys Said 26

  • The past should not be forgotten, that does not mean you need to keep reliving it. I have great memories of past relationships in all their forms. So does they lady I am with. He needs to get over his ego on this, not ask questions he does not want the answers to and if he is into you then make new memories that mean more to you both than anything before you met.

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  • If he can't get over it, you should drop him. No, it's not normal. It's a sign of immaturity and insecurity.

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    • I do hope he gets over it at some point, bc I want to make him happy and he keeps giving me shit for something I can not change.

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    • Hm okay that good to know I guess :/

    • Think about it. He's *so* important that you had to keep yourself "pure" for him. Either he really thinks he's *that* special, or he's so insecure that he thinks he can never measure up.

  • If it means that much to him, maybe respect it at least that he feels that way, but he shouldn't make you feel bad because of it.
    In my opinion he should just move on from it, and it does sound like it could be a matter of just that, where he just needs time to not feel upset about it.

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  • He must move on. He came in your life because he liked you. Now when he knows about your past, you are not a different girl. You are in fact the same girl he liked before so what is the issue.
    Life is too short just enjoy instead of getting into useless thoughts.

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  • listen my current girlfriend went through a bad phase where she slept around a decent amount. we've discussed it and I don't judge her for it. if he really likes you he should be able to overlook it. her body count is significantly higher than mine but I don't care

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  • If he comes from a background where it's considered improper for a woman to have had a previous partner I could see it as a cultural thing. If that's not the case then he needs to get over it and find someone more in line with his ideals.

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  • Holy cr.. no he ain't right making u feel bad. Are you some kind of religious? Than i can't say anythimg about stuff that wants to reason with that.

    But with each friend (f/f f/m m/m) you will get more exp. with yourself which will make you happier on your relationships. Of he keeps making u feel bad, go and get smth. u deserve.

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  • He should move on and has no right to judge and make you feel bad about it... Some are lucky to have long lasting relationships but the rest of us mostly go through a lot of trial and error relationships to really discover ourselves and find the "one" . If he's gonna be primitive about it then leave him

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  • Sounds a bit illogical to me. If I was in that situation I would give him the boot.

    He's in for a world of shock when he realises that the whole world doesn't stop for him and there is no one girl on the planet sitting around waiting for him to come along.

    What's even better if that if you guys did break up, he's now a hypocrite because now if he goes with some other girl, they will realise that they weren't his first girlfriend.

    What an idiot.

    He needs to get over himself and step into reality.

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  • It can be a hard pill to swallow-especially if you loved the person before than-as much as it might hurt-he has to accept it-i don't condone premarital sex-but maybe promise to do a sexual act you haven't done?

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  • He has to get over it or find someone who hasn't had another relationship, but i think he needs to grow up

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  • He should just move on everyone has had a first boyfreind wether or not you. date someone else everyone has had their first sooner or later

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  • The past is the past, you were with the other guy before you guys were together, why should that even matter? Don't let him make you feel bad, you haven't done anything wrong

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  • He is retarded. The fact that he's hanging on to something that's absolutely none of his business is going to be detrimental

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  • If he won't leave it alone, he's way too insecure for you.

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  • Learned from and then forgotten. It's best not to dwell on the past.

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  • Yes he is Right
    No mater the reason you. Guy went apart, if you come across each other there will be some felling for him

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  • He should let go of your past or move on with or without you.

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  • If you forget the past, ugly things risk to happen once more.

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  • He needs to get the fuck over it. Or you need to get the fuck over him.

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  • Hakuna matata

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  • Nope

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  • Tell him to grow up or leave.

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  • Get over it or leave you. On of two.

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  • Get out now

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  • Yes if u have dementia

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What Girls Said 3

  • He should definitely move on. He came in your life later. He shouldn’t be mad about that.

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  • Nope, he's being silly. A mature person would understand that these things are a part of life.

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  • He has to move on and if he can’t and bully you about your pst maybe you should.

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