Is it normal to get extremely jealous if my boyfriend mentions an ex?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • An ex of mine used to question me about my exes out of nowhere, then when I answered her she'd get really jealous lol smh
    Like tf? You ASKED. I never brought them up otherwise though, mainly cause they weren't on my mind. But if a thought about them passed through I didn't voice it because it has no place in my new relationship.
    You have memories and life experiences, they may come back to you now and then randomly, but you don't need to bring the past into your present. Just let the thought pass through and move on.

    If he's talking about them too much then you have every right to feel jealous.

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    • I use to have that exact same bad habit with whoever I dated and was really in to. Then I out of the blew realized how stupid that was and I was basically forcing the guy to hurt my feelings and make me jealous., I was torturing myself with questions of answers that were none of my business and obviously were in the past. Looking back, I can't help but laugh a little on how insane the whole thing was that I put myself in all the time lol.

    • I think its natural, when you are really into someone those questions will come. And part of you hopes the answer will basically be that you're the only one in your SO's romantic life ever, so you don't have to share them at all, even if its just in memory. Its pretty possessive and crazy, but its actually a relatively normal impulse to have I'd say. Its probably not so easy to let go of it, but recognising it for what it is does help to "let go".

Most Helpful Girl

  • In the beginning of a new relationship, you're both going to have baggage to talk about, and bad experiences can effect people for awhile. The longer you're together, the less exs will come up.

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What Guys Said 22

  • yes, to an extent. if your reaction is totally disproportionate to the context in which the topic of his ex came up is conversation then no. just let him know how him mentioning his ex makes you feel insecure so that he's aware of how it impacts you.

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  • I became very jealous too in the First month of the relationship because i was Not Sure what is going on There. (she stayed Friends with him and they Textes sometimes, and i never Met him at this time)
    Later i Met him in her Birthday, saw that He is OK and now i am Not becoming jealous anymore

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  • Yes. Women can really go nuts about it. All of them. Even if you are in a pre dating phase. Boys, never mention an ex! But if you want to get rid of a girl you don’t like, just talk about you exes constantly. She will hate you.

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  • If he is constantly bringing up exes then yes that's very disrespectful , but if it's once in awhile then I wouldn't let it bother you, I dealt with the same shit , and if it keeps continuing I would love on and find someone that respects you

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  • Insecure people will say yes and people who've done the work on themselves will say no... either way its something to work toward eliminating its unhealthy for you and any relationship you may have 😉

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  • Its not out of the ordinary I don't think. In saying that it depends on your reaction... A frown or shitty look that's ok. A knife in the ribs may be a little far tho 😁

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  • Are you a woman? Lol
    No I would say you have trust issues and if you can't trust the person you love THEN LEAVE

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    • It’s not about trust or jealousy. Women can’t cope with the fact that there is still another woman in your head after you know HER! She should have deleted all your memories about your exes. It’s hurting her if you talk about them. Imagine she starts to talk about her exes with you. At which point would you want her to stop?

    • Yes im a woman, and yes I'm really dpuble standard when it comes to my relationship. And your right, I, should, leave. He deserves better. Hopefully, soon I'll get the courage to do it ans give, him a real chance at love.

    • Your reply makes it sound like you think you're not enough for him. And that's not at all what I was saying just that you should be able to trust the one you're with. Me personally if I don't trust I leave.

  • Yes it is normal, happens all the time. It shouldn't, but it does. Would you be upset if he mentions her bad things?

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    • I don't want him to mention her at all. But like I said I'm kind of a jealous possessive girlfriend. I try not to be but I can't sometimes help it maybe I can try harder

    • It can be difficult. Everyone compairs. Which movie is better, what restaurant is better. It is what we, as people, do. Keep talking with him. Express how his actions effect you in this negative way. Communication is key

  • Yes, he could be doing it to make you jealous. . Not fair to you, if he is doing that to you.

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  • If he speaks good of her on repeat, you should have a word with him

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  • Not extremely jealous...
    Not at 31 ...
    Maybe at 15 - 21 yes...

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  • I wish I could answer that but I've never had a decent relationship.

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  • I think yess

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  • Depends of the intentions.

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  • Yeah

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  • Yeah that's weird

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  • Yes naman

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  • What kind of things does he say about them?

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  • it's normal

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  • Eh...

    I mean, how often does he mention her?

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What Girls Said 4

  • For me, yes
    for others... this needs to be a POLL
    but of course, I find it A-OK to mention mine... and have been able to skirt the jealousy issue by making it clear all that is dead & gone, they are not invited to our place & will not see/comm with them again

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  • Depends on the context why he had to bring her up and how often he brings her up.

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    • Okay so we are at Taco Bell with my boyfriend and his cousin and his cousin brought up his ex and somehow they got into a conversation about my boyfriend beating up some guy that had sex with his ex-girlfriend and then my boyfriend was like yeah well I f***** her for 2 days so that guy didn't even know what was going on or blah blah blah and I got jealous

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    • Yeah i calmly told him to not say things like that infront of me, again. Its not appropriate and he apologized.

    • he's lucky he has a mature woman like you. not some psycho. good job :)

  • Only if she's a bitchy slag other than that laugh at her x

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  • Yeah it's normal

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