Is there such a thing as loyalty in women anymore?

I’m reaching the point where I’m of the belief that no one is loyal and everyone is prone to wander. Women in my own family have confided in me telling me they’ve cheated on the father of their children, my exes cheated on me and left for better situations financially. At work I hear married women talking about how they would screw the new guy. All of this just makes me want to say fuck marriage and relationships and just have casual sex with no emotions involved at any cost. Am I wrong in believing this or is hypergamy the truth?

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Most Helpful Girls

  • All the guys I dated either cheated or left me because I wanted to wait to til marriage to have sex.. But I still kept searching, but I never found anyone after my ex breaking up with me. I was honestly thinking about losing my virginity to any guy since it seem like sex was so important to guys. But deep down I also didn't want to give up yet. So I had a little hope left and luckily I met a guy that respects and accepts my decision and we have been together for 9 months so far.
    I understand what you are saying but don't give up hope yet, not every female is the same, just like every guy isn't the same.

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  • I feel the same way about guys. Every guy I've ever been with has cheated on me or left me for another chick. My father used to cheat on my mom when they were married. Married guys keep asking me out. One guy I was dating was already in a relationship but kept it secret from me, once I found out I left him, I won't get involved in anything that has more than me and the other person. And now my ex is trying to get me back when he's already in a new relationship.

    I feel like I don't get people and I don't trust them. Don't they just care? Are they so hormonal that they don't even want to try keeping their pants on? Doesn't commitment mean anything to anyone? Or is it some sort of instant gratification thing, I want something and I want it now, I want to have my cake and eat it too, selfishness?

    I am an extremely loyal person and it has just cost me heartbreak over heartbreak. My mom is the same, she would never cheat on anyone and even though she has been wronged she's sticking with it and trying to work things out. So yeah, I guess there are some of us left, but it's just about finding the ones that believe in loyalty these days. And as far as I've experienced, they're not easy to find :(

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Most Helpful Guys

  • Most women I know are extremely loyal.

    You may need to find new circles my friend.

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    • Do you actually know that or is that what they project?

    • I know that as a FACT!
      Some of them have been cheated on tho. So it's the opposite.

    • About the same here!
      most females i know personality are loyal and the same when it comes to men, but I know some of both genders that haven't.
      All has to to which individuals we surround os with and let in very close to us, also what we project sometimes.

  • Honestly dude I feel the same way, hell, my ex has talked to another guy, drunkenly offered to fuck my best friend, again drunkenly grinded on another guy at Coachella. To top it off after I broke up with her, her first instinct was to go to Sweden and kiss another guy basically telling me she never loved me. The last girl cheated on me, and the one before her left me because I couldn't financially support the shit she wanted to go out and do. I'm sure I just dated shitty ass women in the past 6 years of my life but they all make me want to give up on my one life long dream of getting married with kids and live the Apple pie life. I dont think you're wrong though

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What Girls Said 18

  • Generalizing billions of women (or at least millions in yoir own country) is not only intellectually lazy as it gets, but also completely nonsensical. Your bad experiences are just that. They don't say anything about women in general. The guy next to you might tell you he made the exact opposite experiences with women. So, who's right about women in general then, you or him? The answer is - neither.

    You need to stop judging a large group of people based on your experiences and things you hear. Imagine being a woman and then reading something like this. Do you not realize what an extreme insult that is? You don't know me. You don't know any of us women on here, nor do you know any of the millions and millions of women that you haven't met yet (duh).

    To get to your situation though - if you feel like you want to have casual sex with no emotions involved, then go ahead, if you can manage to pull that off. But it sounds like you're just saying that out of bitterness. And bitterness is one of the worst reasons to do something, so I advise you to rather work on your bitterness instead.

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    • It’s actually an insult to men knowing how women behave

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    • @djmzes But I never said that. Read again, I'm talking about a very specific phenomenon, one that regards a small minority of men. A so called "nice guy" is something completely different than a guy who is simply nice. I actually explicitly explained that in my opinion above.

    • Wait, I made the "nice guy" comment elsewhere actually. So what are you referring to then?

  • Do you notice th cycle yet? Hmmmm man left lady for sex. Lady gets self conscious lady gets back up guys. Guy who truly liked her gets heart broken then becomes bitter and cheats on women.

    While the guys is searching for a loyal lady. The ladies are searching for someone WHO 100% ACTUALLY CARES ABOUT THEM. Actually, both are! We are all both paranoid people who can’t help but generalize people but go through the same motions because we are both in PAIN and SEARCHING for someone who doesn’t inflict pain on us

    Do you know how many times I hear he’s just going to get bored after a few months. How many times I think he’s not worth your time spend your time in a man who gives you the attention. Only to find once they get the title they get bored. Once u mess up one time they back off. We are all expecting a perfect man/woman to go and swoop ya up when we ourselves aren't PERFECT

    So maybe instead of becoming bitter and generalizing ourselves how about we prove to ourselves that we ourselves are loyal? The actIon starts with us! And when people see a loyal person who hasn’t given up... your partner will be inspired to do the same! Or at least give you an honest answer when they feel something is wrong, because YOU voiced out your frustrations too

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    • Well said. Are you really 16? I know 40 year olds who haven't figured that one out!

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    • Yes. People so focused on who they want that they forget who they want to be.

      He's an asshat, great. But who are you? If you do it back, you're more of the same. The race in this life is not with others, it's with yourself. Your legacy is all about who you were, not about who others were. What other people do isn't an excuse for ANYTHING.

    • @liTeWave thats very true!

      exactly! i think it would be nice to write a take on this! when did you learn this?

  • You must be around the wrong kind of women, majority of us are completely loyal. Don’t let the bad few spoil the whole gender for you. Generalization is not cool.

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    • It’s kind of hard not to generalize when I’m just saying what I’ve experienced and come to know.

    • But what you’ve experienced isn’t all women. Like I said, generalization is not cool, not every single person is the same.

  • That’s disgusting. I’ve been married for 5 years and together for 7, with a child. We both are very loyal to each other. His parents were never together and my dad was a serial cheater to my mum. It’s made me more loyal. Women these days have nothing hard against them to keep them in line or think about someone else’s feelings.

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  • Loyalty just seems to be one-sided all too often, regardless of gender.

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  • I am very loyal to guys that I was in a relationship in the past. 3 guys did cheat on me. I broke up with all them. now I have 5 exbf. Most of the girls I met never be nice to me because of they like this guy I used like. That why I date outside of college now.

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  • There are the stereotypical people and then there are the good people. There will always be people who break those stereotypes. There are a lot of good loyal people out there, you just have to find them. I know I would absolutely never cheat

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  • uh yes just cause girls break your heart doesn't mean we all will not all girls are the same just like all guys aren't the same

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  • As a person who’s watched her older brother cheat on every relationship he’s ever had, got married and continued the path. Been lied to and betrayed in my own relationships, watched a friend lie straight to her fiancé about an act she’d done after they had broken up for a brief time. I can relate to that feeling of hopelessness. BUT if I had done what you’re talking about doing I never would’ve met the love of my life. We’re a perfect match in many ways. But we’re also very different. I wouldn’t trade this man for another with a billion dollars or some model. I just want him as my partner forever. We can’t punish potential partners for the actions of others. Go forth with caution absolutely but don’t close off your heart. The potential for real love is out there.

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  • I have never cheated and I am fiercely loyal to my man.

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  • I’m fiercely loyal to everyone in my life. I would never, ever want to do anything that could hurt them. Especially when it comes to cheating. To be honest I often put other people first and myself second because I always end up thinking of everyone else.
    Your black and white thinking is what’s going to really destroy you. I could also say the same thing about men but I bet you’d be one of the first people to tell me that there are still good men out there in the world. So why wouldn’t that same logic apply to women too?

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    • I don't mean to be in any way bothersome here.

      But one thing I've learnt, the hard way, is that when you are "putting other people first", what's really going on is that you find it really hard to deal with people disapproving of you. So you are constantly trying to get or keep their approval.

      You're not putting "other people" first at all. What you're putting first is your need to feel good about yourself, and your need for approval from others. Those are YOUR needs.

      There's nothing wrong with that. But it's important to see it. Otherwise you sooner or later end up in the "I always put you first and do everything for you, but you never do anything for me" bitterness and resentment spiral.

      Hope this helps you in some way. I screwed myself over badly many times by not seeing it.

    • @liTeWave I’m not like that.

    • Lumos, I don't know and I don't know you. All I can say is that I thought I was not either. These can be deep realities, deep, deep, deep. Sometimes we see them only in our 30s or 40s and then realise, once we know ourselves that well. But this is all general. I know nothing about you indeed :)

  • I've always been fiercely loyal to all my partners. Loyalty is very important to me.

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  • It's a rare thing, from where u've heard it.

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  • Yes. But not him tho

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  • Yeah of course every women act and thinks the same

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    • Nah but I can get that if all the women in your area do it, you'd get a view like his, and to be fair, he is asking whether its true, not stating it, so I don't blame him

  • I'm too loyal

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  • 💯 but we’re just trying to avoid being played and holding out for the decent men.

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    • So you play men in return to not get played?

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    • I think everyone is having that problem

    • This is probably true.

  • I’m extremely loyal even to people who don’t deserve it
    When I am committed to something or someone I do my absolute best and don’t give up

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What Guys Said 25

  • It's not hypergamy or anything, people are built to cheat.

    We already know that pure breed is a recipe for bad genes and dumb animals. It's the mongrels that have superior resistance, intelligent and other good stuff.

    So human naturally seeks out variety in their mates. The more mates they have the better their children will be in resisting diseases and have superior adaptability.

    Women tend to change after pregnancy. It has been proven that hormones in women changes their tastes in men. A woman on pills would have a change in taste to like genes that are closer to them while the same woman who are not on the pills will prefer men with different immune traits.

    After settling in their own family, a woman would be very interested in experiencing some spice in their lives as it can get really dull afterwards unless they have to focus on kids and family which would be even more dull.

    Men also have the tendency to cheat. They always want to spread their seeds far and wide so it's pretty natural.

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  • Was with a girl for 5 years. Engaged, Both at uni, looking to buy a house. Been through the most insane shit and hardships together.

    Then one day she just up and left me for a Turk.
    It's been a year and I'm still fucked up.

    As for your question OP, if you did find a "Loyal woman" how would you tell? I couldn't, are you going to wait a decade to find out?

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  • I think the last generation born with loyalty was mine. We had some important values for our life choices. The girls I have from generation X don’t have this values anymore. For them it’s all about success despite they can’t tell what success means.

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  • OK by facts 60% of woman have been chested at least ones in their life men 50%. I think that maybe the human wasn't made to be loyal in the end sex is just natural desire..

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  • Why we all talk about loyalty. in my opinion we all are emotionally connected to each other. Where ever we found emotions connect we are tends to go there. It's just social image and fear which define loyal or not.

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  • My experience with Western women/relationships is the same. Obviously many women have experienced this with men too.

    I'm struggling to come across any loyal decent woman who is not long taken.

    In my position of always being out and travelling a lot among different countries of the world, I meet hundreds of women per day and the way they've become behind their SOs back EN-MASSE after gaining social media access makes you want to puke and avoid any sort of relationship with them.

    They all love to promise they are so loyal/sincere/honest but their actions show the complete opposite. The few that are truly loyal in every way out of millions these days, are an exception and just so hard to come across not already taken.

    In the West under 40s I mean (US/GB) as countries and regions differ massively.

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  • I hear u. Loyalty doesn't exist. The only way to be sure is being ur partners best & only choice. Like being trapped.

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  • In this day and age... No. That's why I refuse to pretend I'm in a serious relationship with anyone. I'm poly fuckarous

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  • Hypergamy is the truth but no woman who is disloyal will admit it

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  • In this deep feminazi society we live in, women have obtained too much power.
    They are told to never improve themselves, and they deserve the world. So yeah, I can see why so many cheat.
    They have the variables A and B with their partner, but really want C as well. They think they fully deserve A B C, which I mean, by all means go for A B C. Just don't find all your variables from separate guys, find it in one.
    But I guess we live in a society now where women don't want to be single, and can easily move through life never being single.
    I have already met many who can't manage being single, and one I was in a relationship for a year.
    They tend to have little understanding of the complexity of the world around them, but they are the world, so fuck me right?
    (These are just surface ideas, for me to explain the psychology behind it would take awhile)
    (This also doesn't apply to all women, there just happens to be a noticeable percentage)

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  • No! Every woman I know is cheating on their husband.

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  • Well... there are some strong married couples try... and there are still some great womens

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  • No your not seems you were dealt a bad hand. go out and have fun

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  • Well its always going to be someone elses falt

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  • Yes.

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  • Pretty fuckin rare.

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  • MGTOW

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  • Yes, it's just rare.

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  • I hope so

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  • Probablyvdeep inside

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