Boyfriend told me to lose weight otherwise he'd leave me?

So my boyfriend basically told me to lose weight cause he thought I was getting bigger, he's been liking gorgeous girls pictures on instagram and it's been getting to me. I told him it hurts me, but it doesn't seem like he cares. I am losing weight, but it just seems like not as fast as he wants me to. He said he wants a thick girl and not a fat one. So I guesss I have to work at it for him to like me. Why do all guys have to treat me like shit since I am fat? I am working on it okay? Why are all guys like this?


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Most Helpful Guys

  • Break up with him. If he is doing that to you then he doesn't love you, he loves what he hopes to turn you into. Don't let him hurt you like that.

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    • It's not the first time someone's told me to lose weight. So I don't know, I don't really believe in love anymore..

    • Gold, you know that's a big jump. People don't like my weight so there is no such thing as love. I know it hurts when people don't accept you... I can't change the physical reason people don't accept me... But it doesn't mean there is no love. Maybe right now you don't feel the "romantic " love but you love your friends or family. So love exists, you just aren't feeling the form you want right now. Honestly, you mentioned how you are the same weight as before... He probably just wants to trophy you and every little bit closer to "picture perfect" you get makes him feel better about himself

      This is about you. You do what makes you happy.

  • Guys have preferences, you can't say all guys are shit just because the one you have now thinks you're too fat. You can just leave him, and find someone who loves you the way you are now, or you can do what he says in hope that you'll stay together.

    I personally wouldn't date a girl I find fat, but that's me. I simply don't find it attractive.

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    • Like I said, I am losing weight. I really don't give a shit if you don't like fat women, it's your preference. I was the same exact weight I was when I met him. Don't know why he dated me to begin with.

    • Hey don't come at me, i'm just being straight up with you. He's clearly either changed his mind, or something else is going on.

Most Helpful Girls

  • People treat us the way we allow them to treat us. You shouldn't be keeping up with this @s*hole, Dump him, then lose weight for yourself, not some jerk. And find a new guy before getting thin or in your targeted shape please so that this time you don't end up with someone who doesn't care for you enough or love you for the beautiful person you really are!! You will surely find guys who are not shallow enough to make you feel that way about 'losing weight', you are capable to find someone who'd encourage you enough!

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  • Dump his ass. That's toxic and abusive. You've told it hurts you and he deliberately says it knowing it hurts you. Find someone who appreciates you for you. A boyfriend should raise you self esteem. He should find you sexy. If he's putting you down and trying to change you then he's a waste of you time. Lose weight for you girl, not to conform to such arbitrary beauty standards of one misogynistic idiot who can't appreciate what he has: you.

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 25

  • While I don't endorse his actions I can definitely understand not wanting to be with a fat person. Truth be told if I was with a guy and he became fat throughout the relationship I'd leave him if he had no interest in losing weight.

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  • That's a really cruel ultimatum. He shouldn't have gotten involved with you at all if he felt that way. "It doesn't seem like he cares" -- sounds like it's time for you to dump him and find a guy who cares for you as you are.

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  • He is being an asshole about it, but at the same time he is telling you what he wants. If you don't want to go along with what he wants it is fine, just know that the relationship won't last. It is better than your boyfriend not telling you what he wants at all and then dumping you out of the blue.

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  • wtf i mean i get it you should lose weight for your own good an your boyfriend should support you and not pressure you to do it even faster by threatening to leave you... i'm affraid he's not a keeper.

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  • 1. Leave him, if he doesn't want you for who you are, he's not worth it. 2. I mostly care about a girl's personality, but there are some awful guys out there.

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  • Some guys love big women I been with afew in my life there's no issue with it if he wants you to lose the weight or he will leave that's just stupid if he loved you it should not matter how big you are.

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  • What a shallow man he is! If I was you, I'd dump him and find someone that appreciates you for who you are

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  • As long as you're not obese its stupid. (But its still rude af) You shouldn't be with someone who you have to constantly maintain your looks to a specific degree with.

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  • Give it the time if you really want to lose it. He doesn't have to like it, but you don't have to put in your all. If he does leave you, he probably wasn't worth it.

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  • They're like that because you have no self-respect.

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  • Then lose weight if you don't want him to leave you. You're lucky he's giving you a chance and not dumping you immediately

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  • depends.. if you are 100 kg above.. you should think about loosing some weight not only for him but for your own health

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  • Have some self respect and don't put up with someone who treats you in such a horrid manner, he should appreciate and love every inch of you; if he can't see you're beauty and likes unrealistic plastic girls on insta then he's shallow and pedantic. He's not showing you the respect you deserve, kick his ass to the curb from the way it sounds a lot less people are going to want to be with him than with you. Don't change yourself for anyone if you can help it; least of all someone like that. Please tell him that he makes me sick.
    Sorry you've been subjected to such a degenerate.

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  • Not all guys are like this. You need to dump this guy

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  • So either lose weight or leave him. Why are you bothering us?

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  • Because you pick the wrong guys

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    • There's no good guys left, they all just want sex and hot women.

    • Not true at all. Many want hot women true that dousnt meen thry are not good. But as far as just sex i would strongly disagree.

    • Yep all of them do men are all pigs, and I am done with dating. EVERY single guy asks me for nudes or sex. I even got unsolicited dick pics.

  • You leave him

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  • Then leave

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  • Dump him immediately then!

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  • Get rid of him shouldn't say that

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  • Leave him. He is a stupid asshole

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  • Because you have shit taste in men, ma'am.

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  • Tell him to get lost

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  • Thick just means, he wants a girl with curves, but not "fat"..

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  • He's an a**hole. Leave him. Not all guys are like that. He seems like a womanizer if he keeps liking other girls pictures.

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What Girls Said 8

  • Make your body look however you want to make it look like while making sure you're healthy in the process. Your boyfriend sounds superficial because of the fact he said "he wants a thick girl not a fat one" where as being thick shouldn't be a requirement. I'd break it off with him.

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  • This is abusive behavior please don't put up with it. ❤

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  • Long before now I would have been showing the pathetic juvenile delinquent where the door was.

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  • u should leave him first
    by doing this u will loose about 80 kgs 😂instant

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  • Dumb him honey.

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  • He doesn't deserve you, girl!

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    • I am not defending him but are you saying she deserves to be fat? lol

  • as far as you aren't obese and feel comfortable in your body, you shouldn't change for anyone, unless you yourself want to. Dump his ass

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  • This is so wrong, leave him please, if you get into a relationship it’s to liven the person for who they are and if he can’t do that then leave him, you don’t have to make any efforts for him since he’s like that, i’m sorry, this may hurt, but you really need to leave him, you’re beautiful just the way you are

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