PLEASE HELP. ALONE TO LONG AND DONT KNOW WHAT I'M DOING. Well yours my profile and my first message please tell me what's wrong?

High my name is Chance, yes really, I'm Porto Rican and White ( care to know those u gatta ask). Just moved to Washington in April and LuV it here so beautiful. I don't really know what to put on these things but I'll give it a shot. I'd say I am an old spirit with a young heart. Luv to laugh but i might be a little cheesy sometimes. I read A LOT, i might not look like it but definitely kinda a nerd. And read everything from science to metascience westerns to the DnD realm. Im in all sorts of music from classical to underground punk, underground hip hop to metal to electronica. I'm originally from the cali desert but spent the last 6 years in Buffalo Ny. I was brought up to be a gentleman (mostly outside the bedroom, lol). Unfortunately Just thats not what their looking for in buffalo i'm hoping its different here Sooo much else is? I luv pretty much anything involving nature and the outdoors and animals and expanding ones self (in Mind, Body and Soul). Umm lets see what else... My Favorite color - Purple = passion and RRoYaLT. Umm.. I can be a little shy and at loss for words at first, but once comfortable luv nothing more than carrying on deep mind blowing conversions that can last hours plus i've been told i'm a great listener too, ( lol here's one of my Many cheesy sayings "we where made with 2 eyes, 2ears and 1 mouth for a reason" lol

I'll update more as it comes to mind, my page came all together out of pieces..

"Greeting message"
GoOoD MoRNinG Beautiful🌹. Hi I'm Chance. How do u do? I'm terrible at all that pick up lines business. But i had to say Something to try and get a second look from u and maybe put a smile on ur face in the prosses so here it goes.

"Something"😁

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  • I think your profile introduction is nice, it's very detailed and gives insight to who you are, and a background about yourself. I would recommend summarizing it possibly, so it's a bit shorter. And also organizing it so it flows better in paragraph forms. That way it's easier to read, and still incorporates everything!

    Your greeting message is kind spirited, however I think you could begin with a simple hello, and a more casual statement. Especially if this is on a dating site, calling each person beautiful isn't always taken in the best way, and it could turn people away from talking with you.
    Try something more friendly, like:
    "Hello, how are you? I saw your profile and wanted to message you, you seem like such a fascinating woman. We share plenty of common interests, I'd love to get to know you more!" something that's to the point, friendly, courteous, and polite.

    Overall, good job though. You've got a great format, just needs some tweaking :)

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