My boyfriend is a good guy, he's like the perfect boyfriend ever... But the problem is I'm super jealous for everything and I wish that would change?

Because of me being jealous and he's knows I'll get upset about certain things he always try not to, even if he has sacrifice having fun. I feel bad for that because I don't want him to feel imprisoned or feel like a slave to me. I just really want to change this one thing about me 😣 *NO NEGATIVITY PLEASE *

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Look, I get it. It's tough and it all comes from a mindset. You have to learn and work on changing your mindset about it. there's plenty of books that can help you learn more. You can do it. You need to.

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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • Jelousy and possessiveness are both indication of a lack of self confidence and trust in your relationship.
    Basically you don't believe that he loves you enough to stay with you and your own worthyness of such love...

    I suggest you work on *that*...
    Other then that having a chat with the poly community might be worth doing...
    They're usually really good at dealing with jelousy (of course they're still jelous at times, but they work through those issues instead).

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  • Jealousy is hate disguised as love and you at least recognize the problem as it is. Normally it would be your insecurity over losing him that causes you to feel that way. The worst part of it is, the more you feel and act that way, the more likely he is to leave you. My opinion is you tell him that you feel that way and ask for his help and understanding. Perhaps he can help you get over the issue.

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  • It depends on how you act. If you get all mad and upset and start crying because you think you don’t look good enough, I’m gone.

    If you’re a competitive raging hormone bitch that will come make out with me in front of other girls to make them jealous, then that’s really cute and fun to me.

    As long as you don’t treat me like crap because of your insecurity I’m fine.

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  • Jealousy comes down to low self esteem. You don't think you are good enough for him so you have a belief that he will find someone better. The issue isn't with how you see him. It's with how you see yourself.

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  • I feel like jealously links to having little self-confidence in one's self. So you should just work on your low self-esteem and get rid of those thoughts in your mind, that assume only negative outcomes about you and your boyfriend. See only the good things and don't worry or even falsely THINK of him going for someone over you.

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  • To be totally honest that would be a reason for me to look for somebody. Having no time for myself and for my friends just because my wife would be jealous, would be a no-go.

    Has he given you any reason to be suspicious?

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  • Aside from the awkward periods, I agree with MajorEasy. The way I see it you have two simple options:

    1. Get some kind of professional help.
    2. Find some kind of space in which jealousy is lighter (even if that means breaking up with him).

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  • I am like that to it totally ok to be jealous... but at least try to trust and believe in him... and always be 100 percent honest with him to etc

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  • Lmao it's called self control. You choose your actions, your feelings don't choose your actions. If you keep acting this way he will run.

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  • Just accept that he is your boyfriend... He is not your pet...

    Accept that he needs to have a life and occasionally, he has to interact with other women...

    The only way forward is to stop yourself from acting out on your jealousy...

    Otherwise... If ever you feel he is unhappy because he can't do things he enjoys due to your jealousy... And if you truly love him and wants him to be happy... Then it's time you walk away from him and let him be happy... That's the true meaning of love... Wanting the person we love to be happy... Even if it means you can't be with that person...

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  • I used to get jealous a lot too. I started to realise that if the girl was as good as I thought then there is no reason to be jealous of anything. Innocent until proven guilty right? And if she turned out to be someone else then it just wasn't meant to be and sump her trifling but on the farthest corner of the worst town. I mean. It is what it is. Don't bother him with a lot of concern but stand up for yourself if there is something he is doing that is genuinely unacceptable. There's a middle ground and it takes two to find it.

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  • Put yourself in his shoes. How would you feel if you were the one who treated him super well and he was the super jealous one?

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  • Has he complained? Is your jealousy unhealthy? If so then maybe you should concentrate on that. Would you want to be treated that way?

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  • Just join him in the activity

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  • No boyfriend is perfect

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  • My girlfriend is very similar

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  • Like me

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  • What are you jealous of?

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    • You beat me to it, I was going to ask that but it seems that she has not replied to you...

    • Seeing him associate with other females etc... And him going out without me, or him hanging with his friends 😭

    • You are a very loyal girlfriend and wish for him to be as loyal. Just remember that girls and guys are people and people associate with other people. You could ask for more participation with him and his friends (because a girlfriend is like a best friend, who wouldn't want them around?)

  • Jealousy will go away in some point if you dont break up before that. If he gives you no reason for jealousy, deal with yourself because imagine how would you feel if someone suspects you and have no trust all the time.
    If somebody accuse you of something you didn't do, it will make you eventually do because you are already paying the price

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