I’m worried my boyfriend isn’t being completely loyal, what should I do?

Before we started dating he was talking to this over girl at the same time, he would lie and say I was the only one. We didn’t tell eachother we wasn’t allowed to see others but he would say little things “your mine” or get really jealous. I found out and went off my head cause he was dragging me along. I feel like I’m his back up, I feel like he’s still talking to her. I haven’t seen him in a week and we are usually together 24/7 but I know deep down he’s not over her. But he’s deeply inlove with me? And she definitely like him but she posts on social media things like “they won’t last” “he’ll come running back-he always does”

What should I do with him?
Should I talk to the girl
CAN A MALE TELL ME WHAT WOULD BE GOONG ON IN HIS HEAD
And some of my sisters, what would you do in my position?
Updates:
Just put this in mind- his mother is very sick recently I wrote this question before that’s all happened

Before we started dating he was talking to this over girl at the same time, he would lie and say I was the only one. We didn’t tell eachother we wasn’t allowed to see others but he would say little things “your mine” or get really jealous. I found out and went off my head cause he was dragging me along. I feel like I’m his back up, I feel like he’s still talking to her.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I guess in your situation the reason why you feel insecure is that you don't know 100% if he was two timing you, & clearly he had some type of relations with this girl.
    Your best bet is to have a conversation with him & let him know you're going to talk to her to get the scoop since you feel there is more (even if you don't intend to). Doesn't sound like she'll hide it. This way he will actually respond and not just tell you bull shit because the cat's out of the bag! From there you'll know, he might fess up, he might laugh at you like your crazy... His response is what you're looking for to gauge if anything really ever happened.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • If you were official and he is talking to her and lying about then I would say to break up because it's too early in the relationship to already be having trust issues.

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    • we have been on and off for 3 years but when we split for a long time inbeween he started seeing her, he stopped contact with her when he realised we are stronger but deep down I have trust issues about her definitely

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What Girls & Guys Said

1532
  • I have a similar story that might provide you some insight.

    Back when I was starting college I moved in with my then girlfriend. Everything was going great, except when I started struggling with math. I met up with a fellow student to study and work on homework a few times a week. She felt like I was cheating on her despite trying to prove my innocence (claimed I wasn't studying, when I would take pictures she thought it was a cover for cheating) and it got to the point that I could never be innocent in her eyes... I can only be proven cheating or I'm just in the process of getting caught.

    The point I'm trying to make is you have to trust your partner, if you constantly doubt his faithfulness, then do you think that makes a healthy relationship?

    I'm not sure if your guy knows you feel this way or not, but sounds like he has a lot on his plate right now with his mom being sick.

    As for the lying about seeing other people, he probably did that because he didn't want to be seen as a player (which he was) but also trying to improve his chances for a partner. I can see him justifying that "seeing someone" implies dating, and talking to a potential partner is perfectly ok as long as he doesn't hit on her or have sex with her while with you.

    I suggest having a sit down, "we need to talk" with this guy. Clearly define what you want from this relationship, what you want from him, what he wants from you (he might need love and support right now not accusations and judgement). If neither of you can find a middle ground you might need to move on and find someone that's a better fit for you.

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  • Question is what u want.. it's seems u want him but u not want to share him... well the girl he talking is in romantic relation with ur bf? Do they meet and is he cheating upon u? Discuss with him openly... tell him ur concerns and what u want... if she is only friend he may not leave her if u asked like this neither u do if u r asked be honest... you can discuss with him why she is important to him as having known that u feel insecure in presence of her.. he is not leaving her.. May be she is in need or his best friend... clear ur mind as of he is not cheating on u then u r not his backup plan.. because if he is young and have a bit shape then he can go with any girl for time pass... try to understand him.. his relation with girl... ask him u want to be friend with that girl and mar ur heart open to handle it.. otherwise if u do have these things u will only hurt ur self and in anger loose him... so choice ur.. fight for ur right or leave him if u cannot but leaving should not be an option... cz it hurts more

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  • Leave him. Sorry about the grandma illness but shouldn't that be something he would come to you for little bit of support? And he talking to this other girl, that says he lacks the respect you deserve from a man not a boy. Dump him, its not meant to be. Good luck.

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  • Seeing you have trust issues with him, I think you need to talk to him. If you both can't resolve the issue/s together, then it may be worth thinking about how you feel, and if you two belong together.

    Relationship are difficult, but you still need to be true to yourself.

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  • My guy told me I'm his number one.
    He used a emoji number 1 medal tho.
    I thowt it was cute at the time but...
    Dude If there is a two and three you have lined up after me I don't want nuthing to do with ya lol.

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  • If he's fooling around with another girl then he's obviously not yours.

    Just because a guy gets jealous doesn't mean he cares about you as a person. It just means he wants you to himself not that he cares about you.

    Honestly if you can't trust a man then there's no reason to be with him.

    You need to find someone you can't trust in 100% because relationships don't work if you two can't trust each other.

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  • Cut your loses I hate people like you you put ur self in a weak shit situation then ask dumb question dwell on obvious facts ! U knew from the get go he was a bitch u still stayed so u have two options suck it up n let him treat u like like trash or move the f on from this dumb scum voila! Tough love hope u don’t get offended good luck 👍

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  • I wouldn't talk to the other girl because she sounds like the type that would like the power it made her feel. Have you had any contact with him in the last week?

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    • Yeah I have but he’s been really quite and I can’t force anything on him atm because his mother is in hospital very sick

    • Okay, I was thinking you thought he was cheating because you haven't seen him in a week. Other than the other girl making posts what makes you believe he still has feelings for her?

  • In my view he is treating you as a choice, he may give you now the confidence that he may be with you forever, but when he finds a girl hotter and beautiful than you he may leave. So talk with the girl and find out whether he is interested in her and if your doubt is right then just without any second thought just breakup with.

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  • Honestly, if I were you Id be talking to the man and asking him listen is there anything between yous anymore because its not fair to me to get hurt if you know your going to go running back!
    Also Id most deff be talking about this with the chick too and asking her why she's posting rude comments on social media... and most importantly what he wants and who he wants to be with. l

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  • go taalk to him. thid is the exact thing i thought with my boyfriend. he was spending too much time with my bestie and when i decided to talk to him it was too late and i found out they slept together. so go talk to him asap

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  • From what i can tell, you are probably right.. sorry
    If you guys are a new couple he should like to spend more time with you.
    Check to see if he is really worry about he s mom or if that s just something he uses to have more time away from you.
    Anaway u should take some distance... somthing is up for sure.

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  • Simple, don't do anything, eventually he will screw up and then you can just end everything there.

    Or if you really want to know, I would suggest just confronting him, in a calm not loud and angry manner, and sort out all the doubts. If you do talk to him, just listen carefully and don't only hear the words you want to hear.

    In otherwords this is how adults solve relationships. No need for pointless screaming, accusations or seeming.

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  • Best thing to sort these problems are to clarify everything you have in your head
    And if one found guilty , you should talk to him and tell him that how you feel cause elsewise it'll be the last time he'd be talking to you

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  • I feel bad for him but i honestly think he's using you and i think just dump him he doesn't deserve such an amazing person and ya leave him plenty of chocolate left in the chocolate cake ( fishes dont work well with me )

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  • It goes sound like you're his back up, first of all you have to confirm that he talks to that girl, Snoop around a little, get his phone and check the stuff, it's not right but the only way to find out. Then you'll know what to do.

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  • Dump him if you are insecure about him.

    He is probably around your age and he'll say or do anything to get in a female's pants. Not personal, just not ready to settle.

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  • Call him and see where he’s at. Don’t contact the girl until you have proof that they’re still talking.

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  • A feeling isn't enough.
    Get evidence confront him and end it. You can still support him as a friend.
    Compassion is a thing and relationships are something else.

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  • ur the one dating a guy who talks to other girls, don't fkn look at me. Maybe choose someone worthwhile next time lol

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  • Try to be straight up and ask him about it and not be sneaky and aloof to figure out the answer for yourself.

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  • Using you like a puppeteer on his favourite puppet. Perfect.

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  • I would say if he is truly in love with you then he wouldn't talk to any other girl and he would have to prove that he loves you

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  • You can either be a part of the action or hop in bed with me. Either way you're sleeping in a cozy Bed.

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  • BUSH DID 9/11 PEOPLE OPEN YOUR EYES IT WAS THE JEWISH MEDIA WHO COVERED IT UP

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  • He's definitely cheating he doesn't love you and he never will break up and find someone who loves you without reservation. good luck

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  • Talk it out with him
    If it don't work then leave him

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  • Make him start wondering what your doing and see if he likes it..

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  • Cut his cock off and throw it into a blender

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  • Have some self respect girl. Why be second choice?

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  • Confront him and then leave

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  • talk to him about it

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  • Girl dump him

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  • Damn

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  • Castrate him

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  • What do you think?

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  • He is using u

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  • Leave

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  • Check his phone asap

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  • Ok.
    Do not waste your time speaking with her.

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    • Do not get violent like someone suggested.
      You should bang one of your professors.
      Or his best friend

  • Leave him

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  • Talk to him about it

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  • Leave him and don’t be a dumb hoe

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    • His mother is dying, maybe This dumb hoe should wait?

    • No get out while you still can he’ll use his mom as leverage

  • I've been in a similar position so just ask him to block her on everything because you feel uncomfortable, I know that seems childish but it's not like they're friends, it's like they're more so it seems like he's leading both of you on unless he isn't speaking to her anymore and she's just being petty.

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  • ditch him plenty of fish in the sea find someone who you love and he loves you unconditionally

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  • Just go get gang banged by a pack of blacks and you'd get back at him. I promise. He'll become mentally unstable. Only if he's white. But a mentally unstable white boy is dangerous. Mass murderer

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  • Break up with him and if it is truly meant to be fate will bring you back together

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