What if you had limited options at a time in dating apps?

I generally speak with 3 or 4 women when it comes to initial messages moving forward into dating. It helps me understand that person's characteristics and potentially develop a unique connection. It's nice to have engaging conversation as opposed to repetitive small talk.

I had an epiphany moment. Maybe the reason lots of people dont put genuine effort is the possibility that a "Unicorn" (perfect in every way) person will come along. The small off chance that this amazing person will choose me.

That's when it hit me. Allowing myself a select few of matches at a time limits my options and helps me dive into each person's personality. Before, when I didn't do that and "liked" everyone, I never came close to feeling motivated to carry on past tiny gripes.

How do you swipe? How many others do you talk to at once? How many people do you let have your number? Best of all, how often do you find yourself not amused with that person when someone else more appealing messages you?

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  • I usually only talk to one person at a time, because I can't concentrate if I have to juggle many people. I can start conversations with about three to five people, but quickly narrow down the person I'm actually interested in, and therefore end the discussions with the other people. Because dating apps are so appearance centered, I find it important to initially start conversations with a few people, instead if just one, because if I'd make the decision only based on looks, I'd probably make the wrong decision. I don't give my number to people, unless they've made the "final cut". I think I've given my number to two people through a dating app in total.

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  • I think you're on to something. It takes a lot of time to communicate with lots of people at once.

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