Am I being needy or is he not being available or neglecting my needs?

I seriously want to know if I am crazy or not, sometimes it feels as if I am being so selfish and needy and other times I feel as if I am not acting our of character for this situation.
While this hasn't always been his situation with me being with him, it has been going on since around November - December.
Let me tell you what our situation has been for the past six months. I always go to his house, we haven't had a date outside of the house in months. I understand he is tight on money at the moment because his job fluctuates at the start of the business, but soon he should be making a sufficient amount of money so I am not worried about him. But he is very stressed about paying bills and he doesn't want to have to move away from me. Another thing is that when we are together he works the entire time we are together and we hang out once a week even though we live ten minutes away from each other. He doesn't like distractions so he'll invite me over at the earliest 6 pm and then I have to leave really early for class or he just wants me to leave before he ends up waking up because he likes to just get back to work. He gives me about 10-15 min when i arrive to talk to me then its mostly just silence and random pops to come hug me and then back to work. This has been going on for six months and I love him so much, but it kills me that I just want a normal day with him, just me and him, no work. Of course I don't demand that from him, but whenever I call him that I am sad that day or miss him extra he gets mad and very straight forward. He essentially tells me that he won't take my crying or missing calls. He never wants to me to call him on the phone because I like to talk to for too long which is my fault, but its because I miss him and enjoy talking to him. And we have such a short time together.
Am I crazy to get emotional over this?

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Most Helpful Guy

  • I certainly don't think you're being too needy. That doesn't sounds like much of a relationship you have with so little time together and so little interaction even when you are together.

    I think it's totally normal to want more than you have there.

    Would you consider dating someone else for now and then if that doesn't work out you could check back with this guy and see if he's reached a point where he can spend a reasonable amount of time with you. Different people need different amounts of time together with their partner to be happy, but honestly it's hard for me to imagine anyone being happy with how little you're getting.

    I wouldn't count on it changing either. A lot of times those people that devote almost every minute of their day to work are workaholics that will continue doing that no matter what the situation.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • @heyyyy123 well you either accept it or you don't. Seems like he's a very devoted man to his work (which isn't a terrible thing)... But will it be in the long run when you have a family? Some people find their success in their work, and others find success through other means. If this is his focus, and you are going to stand by him to make it better than great. But if your needs aren't being met now, don't go into it assuming it will change.

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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • I don’t think this boy is healthy for you. The way he prioritizes you is really hurting you AND it’s not okay that he refuses to listen to you.

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  • I think you aren’t being needy, just wanting to spend at least a little time with him. You should talk to him about his job and how you want to spend time with him but can’t, and see if he can make time in his day for you.

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