What do you think about dating women with kids?
What Guys Said 90
I've done it. Certainly it's harder than dating women without kids because kids require a lot of time and attention and so it's harder for her to be available for other things and if the kids are with her all the time (not like alternating custody with their dad) then you get a lot less time with just the two of you together.
But if the connection with her is strong, it can be dealt with and you can even develop a good relationship with the kids.
I saw a question on here a few months ago where a woman tragically died and her boyfriend (who was not the kids' father) was serious considering taking care of them (and her parents wanted him to) because he had developed a good relationship with them. That's a really extreme case, but it does happen that boyfriends come in and become like second fathers to the kids (or sometimes even more of a father than the real father).
I think it is definitely harder on the guy that dating a women with no kids or grown kids though but if the woman is special enough it can be worth it.
I have no issues with it. I have two daughters and since getting divorced 7 years ago the majority of the women that I've dated have had kids. I think it's better because if you have kids you can understand each other and you both know that kids will always come first.
There are so many variables to consider. How old are that kids? How many? Realistically how much time do you have to put into a relationship, or is it just going to be a date night here and there? What is the situation with the father? And that's just a few things to consider, but that being said, it's in no way a reason to just automatically not want to date a woman.
Honestly, I think it sucks. Especially if the father is not in the picture. For the main fact I feel like I'm the parent and we have to sneak around in order to have sex because it does put a damper on the sex life. And we all know sex isn't a problem until there is no sex in a relationship. Just my honest opinion from dating somebody with kids. But then again my circumstances were different because the father of the children was a complete piece of shit and was out of the picture and it was a very jealous and mischievious person and tried breaking us up left and right so as long as those factors don't come into play I don't think it's an issue. I do not think that the woman should bring the kids around the new boyfriend for at least 6 months and even then I don't think it should be family outing type deals where the boyfriend brings the entire crew out for dinner at the 6-month mark But if the relationship persists into a long-term one I don't think it's an issue at that point if the relationship has gone on for well over a year you tend to fall in love with the children also and that's just my experience also but it is hard to do. And I'll say what other men won't say if you do end up getting in a very serious relationship with a woman that has kids please for the love of God woman do not say how much pregnancy sucks and how much you hate it and this and that because you've already had a child with somebody else and if you're going to have a child with the person that you're with now the specialness of having a child with you is already out the window because you've already done it with somebody else so don't go putting a damper on it even more by saying how horrible it is and how much you hate it and how blah blah blah blah blah blah it is it just hurts to know that you won't be having your first child with the person that you're with now and it hurts the guy as much as he won't want to admit it
I try to avoid it. They usually have less time, and depending on the ages the kids can be brats. I was once in a serous relationship with a woman that had one son. One day when the kid was acting up I heard her say to me, "Well he's not your son". No he was not, but that one statement took away any hope of being a family.
Depends on how much interaction their father has in there life. Nothing will change that he is their birth father, he will have a special place to her and them and for me if he is around a lot it would be difficult not to get paranoid.
I'm totally okay with it, just as long as she's not expecting me to take on a father role from the very beginning. As long as we communicate and it becomes a mutual understanding, then it's perfectly fine with me.
I had a reasonably good stepfather, who probably was as good as, if not better than, what I would have experienced with my biological father if he had chosen to stay with me.
Despite this, I never felt nearly as close to my father as I did my mother, and I still call him by his first name rather than "Dad". Perhaps this reflects more on me than on my dad. I don't know.
I can say with certainty that I would never want to be in his position.
Life happens but its intimidating for a descent guy because when you date a mom you are also becoming a part of that childs life and real men worry about how they could effect that childs life
I have done it, but you have to be ready for a lot. And you have to have the same parenting ideas as the mother because for the first while you have no say.
The guy just has to understand that he won't ever be the priority in the woman's life, and that's as it should be if she has kids.
I won't. At least for now. It adds an entirely different dynamic to the relationship that I am currently not ready for.
\\Doesnt matter if she has kids or not, Love is Love.
I mean I'm trying to avoid it cause I'm not ready to be a parent, And i doubt i would have the capacity to be a step father knowing that at any point the woman could just leave with the child whom i would then have no right to see
I'm too young to, but if im much more stable in 5 years sure, I always liked the idea of having kids.
Well if the person is looking for a wife or a family then that would be perfect
I would but, it depends on her relationship with her ex.
Terrible idea. Means they date by looks and irresponsible. Also if their kids father doesn't pay child support they can screw their significant other by getting them to pay child support.
Ultimately if I cared for the person It doesn't matter. But personally the thought of having children myself scares me enough as it is, so I would be a bit apprehensive about dating someone who did.
well least they are ready to settle down for the most part. Which is a plus for me
as you get older avoiding this will become almost impossible. It signs you up for lots of baggage and a drain on your finances. Unless you wants kids its all downside
It depends on how many and how oops they are... If it's more than two then it's a lost cause, she'll never take the relationship seriously and if they're teenagers then it's easier...
I have kids so corse I would date a woman with kids
I think that it's alright. Plus kids can be pretty awesome. And I don't know. There's something nice about it.
I don't have any kids of my own and feel like I missed the boat on that. I would be honored to be a father figure to some ladie's children.
No that big a deal if you are good with kids anyway
Not anybody can or should do it, you have to be prepared and mature enough
As long as the kids and a non parents are okay with each other it should be fine
I'll do it. But only if the mom and I are stable. I play for keeps so I dislike the idea of being in a child's life only to leave
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