Why are girls attracted to socially successful guys but then resent us for being socially successful?

Girls want guys with high value, guys who other girls want. Most girls want to be with guys who are sought after and who are extremely attractive to other girls. What I don't get is why those same girls seem to resent that these attractive guys also get attention from lots of other girls. They want attractive guys, but not what comes with that. It's like the guys who lust after strippers and then resent that other guys are there too.

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What Girls Said 3

  • Were programmed to look for attractive people to be able to pick good genes for our future kids. The thing is with time people realize that looks isn't all. A man can be poor, he might not be Brad Pitt, but he can be the most amazing person youve ever known. Unfortunately other people never realize that and never look deeper under the looks losing their chance of happiness. But you know what they say: For every good man you turn down you get 1 cat when you turn 40. :D

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    • That's a pretty funny line. I get irritated when girls try to change me, like they fell for me because I'm physically attractive and confident with girls, then they get mad that girls give me attention. If they want guys who they can control, they should date skinny, shy guys with no confidence.

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    • True you just need someone who thinks that "You have my full trust till you break it".

    • I agree. I also want someone who accepts me as I am and, maybe vainly, I wouldn't mind someone who actually admires my social power. I've worked hard to build it, and it feels bad having to stifle.

  • I don't feel that the idea of being attracted to "socially successful" guys applies to me, as I'm one who tends to steer away from men who have loads of admirers as I truly don't like the feeling of "competing" for attention. I mean I don't care for a socially awkward person, but I don't care to end up with a man who isn't able to treat me differently than other women so that I know that I'm viewed in a different lens than all those other women who claw at him. I'm rather repelled by men who enjoy charming multiple women to gain a means of fluffing his ego.

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    • I know not every girl is attracted to this type of guy, but most are. And I do understand about not wanting to compete for someone's attention, but it's silly for someone to want a bear for a pet and then get offended when it bites. It's the nature of the beast. Being attracted to guys who are sought after means that your man will have options. Otherwise, be ok dating the shy overweight guy who had trouble even saying hi to you.

    • Haha, you can't make a comparison between a man and a bear lol. Sure both have an animalistic character to them, but men have the free will to know how to control their behavior/his raging testosterone/his "jr" in between his legs.

      I believe however, that resent within a relationship comes with not knowing how to properly communicate and understand one another's standards within one's personal "ideal" relationship.

    • It's just an analogy. I could compare men to video games, but I like bears. And yes, we do have self-control, but toning down my personality for someone else is lame. No self-respecting girl would do it for me, so why should I do it for them?

  • Because they want what they want. They want the socially successful, confident guys, but they want to have them to themselves. They want the stud to be totally committed to them and to ignore all other girls.

    Guys try to do this with me all the time. I get tons of male attention, and that will never stop. But the secret is that a lot of these people are out of their depth with social stars like us, because they can't handle what comes with being with us. An intensely sexy and magnetic person will always draw interest like moths to a flame. People who aren't used to it don't understand it, and it throws them off. A confident guy would know he's better than the guys who are buzzing around me and wouldn't worry.

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