I'm not sure if I'm ready for a relationship yet?

My last serious relationship was about a year ago, I had a couple month fling with someone and it didn't work out. After that I really decided to focus on myself, lose weight, work on my hobbies, etc. I've been making great progress. But during this time I continued to use dating apps, I talked to a few here and there.

The other week I started talking to this girl. We have gone on a few dates and the other night she asked me what I was looking for. She didn't want someone who just wanted sex, I had never been someone looking for a hook up, I was always needed a connection to someone to have sex with them. But she asked me if I was ready for a relationship and I said I think so? I wanted to be honest, I wasn't sure. I told her that since I was trying to make all these changes in my life, I wasn't sure if I was ready. I'm trying to be more honest about things, and I really don't want to hurt someone if we continue seeing each other and it turns out I actually wasn't ready for a relationship.

Basically I'm not sure what to do, we've only been on two dates, the dates are fun but I also don't really know her that well because she tends to give very short answers over text. I just don't want to cause her pain if we continue to go on dates and it turns out I don't want a relationship. I don't regret being honest with her at all. I am just not sure what I should do, I'm right in the middle of my weight loss, something I've been wanting to do for years because I've always been very self conscious of my weight. I'm also afraid that I may be trying to get into a relationship because I'm lonely (all my friends and family live in other cities). I don't want to get into a relationship just so I can have a connection with someone, because then I'd literally be using them as an emotional crutch.

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  • You were right about being honest. I think you should keep focusing on yourself for the time being and when you're happy with it, then decide if this is something you want to start with her. A relationship requires a lot of attention, so consider it when you're fully focused on that.

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