How do I make the first move?

I’m 16, I’m awkward as hell, and I like to think I’m a pretty big loser. But I finally had the balls to ask a girl out, and we’ve been on 3 dates, and I can’t even hold her hand... I don’t know what’s wrong with me, and I’m kinda scared that I’ll never be able to do anything if I don’t get through this. I really need help...

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  • Your nervous. Thats fine and perfectly normal for us highschool kids. Im going to assume you haven't done much dating before but you need try and be confident about this just like you were when you asked her out. It isn't as hard as its made out to be. You just need to think about how nice it would be to hold her hand also i would recommend using maybe cologne just make your self smell nice she will want to get closer to you if you do.

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    • The last relationship I was in was grade 6, and tbh I don’t usually count that... I just don’t know why but I think about it, I want to, but then I choke and just hate myself afterwards for being such a pussy. She likes me, and I know that, I just can’t show her I like her too...

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    • I wish I could think like you all the time lol. But you’re right... I don't know how I can get over it though, that’s my problem

    • In highschool dating is all about flirting and being subtle. I think a good way to do it would be to get you and your girlfriend and 2 of your friends who are dating each other to hangout. Theyre probably gonna hold hands hug and kiss so when they start holding hands with each other just ask your girlfriend to hold your hand. Because more people in the group are holding hands it should seem less stressfull and anxiety inducing

  • If it helps, this girl is probably at home right now wondering "Why won't he even hold my hand? Did I do something wrong? Does he think I'm ugly? Do I smell? I'll bet he really doesn't like me at all..." It's natural to doubt yourself. Holding hands is a relatively innocent gesture, so it is socially safe to attempt. Even if things went sideways and she didn't want to, you aren't going to be condemned by society for wanting to hold a girl's hand. Go for it.

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    • I really hope she isn’t thinking that. She’s a great girl, and it’s my fault for sure. We’re just both super shy and it’s just challenging for both of us.

  • This is a little trick for insecurity that I learned. Before the date get ready try to look your best. But don’t spend too much time in the mirror. Pretend you look so hot and so great in your clothes. Think that the whole date. Now, this idea may sound cocky but it will boost your confidence. Pretend like you totally know what you are doing. You only live once. Make the most of every moment

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