Can cheaters change? I love him but im so worried?

We have been dating for 6 months and I love him more than anything. He has cheated on me in the past and I'm just worried. Can guys change?

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711

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  • The relevant question is not CAN he change but WILL he change. Everyone has the capacity for change but few people change significantly. If he is not motivated to change, he will try to convince you otherwise with his words so ignore his words and focus on his actions. What is he doing to try to change?

    Remember that all cheaters feel bad when they are caught. "I feel horrible" is a meaningless plea under these circumstances.

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What Girls & Guys Said

710
  • With help, perhaps. The root of cheating is almost always linked to an emotional/psychological problem like insecurity, which is a personal issue that doesn't really get better without putting in the effort. If he makes no effort whatsoever to change that aspect of himself, he'll most likely continue in a loop of cheating, getting caught, apologizing profusely and telling you what a terrible person he is, and the cycle restarts.

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  • I'm surprised that many here say people don't change. If so then every prison sentence should be for life. It's not often but people do change. You should also consider the circumstances of the incident. Was it premeditated? Are there behaviors associated with the cheating that still carries on e. g. being secretive, etc?

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  • No never...
    Cuz you girls have shown them what they can get in cheating and what they get being nice.

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  • Lmao why are you still with this guy? He doesn't care or respect you whatsoever, as evidenced by his past actions. You're just setting yourself up to be hurt by the same greedy, indulgent behavior that he's displayed before.

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  • They can change, but not if he has cheated that early in the relationship. You are setting yourself up for heartbreak.

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  • Only if they wanna change, but if not; they will remain the same!

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  • cheaters always cheat sis please they will never change

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  • Guys are opportunistic so if he's done it before then chances are he will again some guys can control their instinct some can't obviously he can't

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  • Yeah they change and all the guys are not cheaters... if think all guys are same then meet mine one

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  • Not really 6 month is really less and he is not in love

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  • They never change

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  • Never change just aged.

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  • Nope

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  • No. He's done it once, he'll do it again

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  • Cheaters are always cheaters!

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  • Cheaters never change

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  • He can change he just has to want to.
    It will take a lot of work on his behalf and you will need to learn how to trust him once again which can be easier said than done.
    A relationship can work after an affair, mine did and over a year onwards we are doing really well. My heart isn't as broken as it was last year and it just keeps getting better. Mind you I'd been with my husband for over 13 years.
    Can you still see a positive future?
    Can you look at some of the memories without feeling sadness?

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