Is it normal for things to be awkward initially when dating?

This guy and I just met.. we got matched up kinda by my friend but I suggested it since I thought he was cute. He thought I was super cute too and the first time we met sparks FLEW. We have a date tomorrow, but today I briefly saw him and things weren’t like the first time, it was more awkward and stiff... like he asked me questions about myself and family but I hate direct questions without much context and I just didn’t answer fully and the whole thing between us today felt off. Like I was super nervous and he was nervous and I swear most of the things I said were literally so stupid because all I could think about were how great his eyes were. Is this normal?

Is it normal for things to be awkward initially when dating?

1|0
2587

Most Helpful Guy

  • Yes, but you know, I think awkwardness can be cute, endearing and even sexy depending on how the other person handles it and responds. I aware, I have no reason to by shy, not at this point, and I’m not a shy person but if a girl can make me feel shy, that is a good thing, but it’s my job to let her know that. You really do have to allow yourself to be vulnerable, take risks and see the humor in it, or else awkwardness can easily be misinterpreted. If the guy is not able to use the awkwardness to both of your advantage, than sometimes, the girl has to take the lead, and break the ice

    1|1
    0|0
    • I’ll actually tell you about my last date awkwardness, she had no reason to understand why I was shy, she thought she had the wrong guy, as I was so different. The reality was, I had a boner talking to her and it was totally inappropriate, and I felt like dying, I thought she knew or saw it and got all nervous, basically walked away to allow things to settle down. In the meantime she actually was texting her friend “he doesn’t like me and is bored” so you see? How messed up it is? The only reason I know this, is because I had the balls to tell her, not that I wanted to, not because I felt it was flattering or strategic, but I told her because it made me totally vulnerable and took a risk... guess how the night ended? Or do you really have to guess

Most Helpful Girl

  • Uh... YES! What you want is a player. They are smooth from date 1 until they dump you for your best friend. Otherwise conversation is based on shared experiences and interests. Since you have no experiences you have to find out interests via questions. Give him a break. He's actually trying. You can ask questions too. Google questions for dates and pick a few to add into your convo to make it more interactive.

    Ps. Almost all 2nd dates are awkward. Thats why i always go on 3 boyfriend deciding, unless i find out something super bad on date 2, like he's married.

    1|1
    0|0

Recommended Questions

Loading...

Have an opinion?

What Girls & Guys Said

2486
  • Not if you both have had a mild acquaintance and chatted some before an actual date.

    0|0
    0|0
  • First dates usually are awkward. It sounds like you guys just really like each other though, and that made you both nervous or he could sense how nervous you were and that made him a little on edge. Give it a few more dates and get to know each other better. What's the worst that could happen from getting to know someone? Unless he's actually a creep, but I think you would know by this point if your friend set you up to begin with, and you've already spent time together.

    1|1
    0|0
  • It’s completely normal. Just nervous. Soon you’ll both be so comfortable around each other. I’m jealous. If it’s real don’t let it go! Don’t blow it. A real relationship with the whole initial courting and dating is hard to come by now. All men and women want nowadays is to hookup and chill and it’s horrible! I wish you two the best of luck. Enjoy it! Don’t take it for granted.

    Go on a carnival date for me.

    1|0
    0|0
  • Sure Awkward Moment when you guys first engaged each other on that first date it was more of a physical attraction then when you saw each other for the second encounter even if you are nervous to lay down some type of foundation and understanding about who he was and who you are this is normal between a man and a woman because you don't want to show all your cards to someone that you just have met you want to keep it positive and keep him sense of Mystery in the atmosphere but at the same time your do want you know if this goes any farther than friendship or just fun and maybe into a solid relationship you like to know a person's past present and what they want in the future and that could be scary cuz it is a certain criteria that the person is looking for and you questions yourself always but can I meet that level of expectation I think that's something that we all do to our own selves it is normal don't worry about it your next date you should just go out and have a ball and if you feel awkward bring some friends

    1|0
    0|0
    • If she brings friends she'll friendzone herself cause the guy will think she doesn't like him romantically/sexually. Or he'll think she's socially retarded not realising it's a date.

    • Of course it is because she's new to you and your new to her and you both trying to learn what each other likes good or bad so a little awkwardness is something to expect but if you really like her and she really likes you the confidence will show improve

  • Yea
    But it does not matter.
    It is a new journey and u have overcome your fear and do it if you want it to work.

    1|0
    0|0
  • Its normal because you are still getting to know the person while trying to make a good impression. You get caught up in trying to do your best and not say anything stupid or show your nerves. Overtime it gets easier you get accustomed to the person you learn their interests and will find things in common

    1|0
    0|0
  • Yes it’s completely normal. The awkwardness sounds like it’s just because you’re overthinking things now. You had a good first date but know you have to build on it and get to know each other. Don’t worry you’ll get over the hump and settle in to more normal/regular dating. Just give it some time.

    1|0
    0|0
  • Just relax!!! He’s probably nervous too! Just be honest if you’re nervous and just try to make it how it was when you first met! No pressure girl! As you both get more comfortable with each other you’ll eventually not be as nervous!

    1|1
    0|0
  • Yes it's normal. But you lack confidence so I would encourage you to work on that. Just know that no matter what happens it's okay, good bad or indifferent, the relationship will progress, or it won't. It's all good no matter what. NOTHING is critical. Absolutely nothing. Just enjoy yourself, get to know, and see where it goes.

    3|0
    0|0
  • Yes but this is why women or men can't put as much emphasize on first date as to how they like person because most people's first reaction to a new situation is nervousness. Whether a new class, job, or first date. Now if it's continuesly awkward you guys might not have much in common but really be attracted to each other

    2|1
    0|0
  • Hahaha so normal. There are many types of beginnings. The natural one, the fake persona or in your case the nervous one. Things were so great you expect the next time to be better but to start a relationship is to build a friendship step by step and the foundation is boring but essential. Now is the time not to feel butterflies only but to LISTEN. If a man asks you about your life is a good sign. Give gim the same gift.

    1|0
    0|0
  • Don't worry about it. This is normal. Seems you are both finding your way. Don't let this bother you and don't shy away from seeing him or talking to eachother. Things will smooth out very soon. Just enjoy it even the awkward stuff. It's fun to look back upon later. :)

    1|0
    0|0
  • Yes, I think that it pretty normal. It is because you are both nervous. Next time you could try to break the ice. Make a little joke or something. It doesn't matter how stupid the joke is, it will ease the tension

    1|0
    0|0
  • He really likes u, so he was nervous.

    Nervousness in a guy is a good thing, because that means he is really into u, vs you just bring another notch on his bedpost.

    If u want perfectly smooth rapport all the time, then date a player using rehearsed lines, that doesn't care about u at all, and will eventually break your heart. 😂😂😂

    1|0
    0|0
  • See... don't worry. We all want our dates to go perfect so we prepare ourself for that. But that inner feeling of hesitation still remains in our heart. So most of the dates, initially, goes wrong.
    I suggest you to spend time with him so that he can know you and can talk on the topics you like. When we meet first time we wasn't aware about the personality of the person in front of us; but as time passes we came to know each other better.
    Hope this would have helped you!

    1|0
    0|0
  • Yeah it's very normal but directly asking questions about u n ur family makes u little awkward but Dnt feel bad about it. May be is nervous coz its his first time talking with girl so Dnt worry. It's cool catch him up and decide what is what

    1|0
    0|0
  • Then he’s lost his nerve.
    Poke fun at his behavior a little (but not too mean) and compensate by ruffling his hair or give him a hug.

    That is, show that you think he has lost his cool somewhat, but at the same time, that’s alright.

    Good test at any rate. Either he comes around then or he has a bad reaction. If it’s the latter, he’s probably not a very good guy.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Yeah, your fine... The initial date when well the first time... Just relax, the hard part is over. One thing is you don't have too always find something too say... Just calm down, and let the night take you to whereever you want it to do.

    1|0
    0|0
  • Completely normal. I’m more worried when everything goes smoothly because I think they don’t really like me and are just looking for a fling... or were. Am very off the market.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Yes its normal and his "nervousness" can be considered as positive sign and it looks like, you guys are really in to eachother but I would recommend patience cuz I have seen couple breakup cuz they can't deal with initial awkward behaviour and things don't work out unless you made them work-out.
    You reminded me of my first date and someone special and finally after 5 years the bond is very very strong and I can get the answer just by looking at her face.
    I hope you guys will cement bond like this but enjoy these are the memorable movements, you will laugh about later in the relationship.

    2|1
    0|0
  • Yes normal. I hate dating for this reason. So awkward and uncomfortable. In no way is it "fun" like it's supposed to be.

    2|0
    0|0
    • The fun is in being able to handle awkwardness and silence like a boss, and then her freaking out about it and trying to impress you when you are content to handle the tension and smile at her waiting for her next move.

  • I agree it is normal to feel awkward at different points starting out. However, the sparks changing is a bit odd... see what happens with the date but trust your gut... if the chemistry isn't there something is wrong and make your way out of it...

    1|0
    0|0
  • Yes things sometimes get awkward and it is fine just don't let it be an everyday thing because then it becomes a dull relationship talk it out or go out and do something together like watching a movie or going out and eating explore new things and you will be just fine

    0|0
    0|0
  • Yes you've started to know enough about each other that you ran out of things to talk about. Try breaking the mood by putting your arm around him or really just touching him in any way. If he didn't like you he wouldn't be there.

    0|1
    0|0
  • When I really like a guy I usually suck at the date. If I’m not that bothered by him and I’m just going to get to know him see if there might be a spark I’ll be great.

    It’s SO weird

    1|0
    0|0
  • It's nerves. Just joke around to break the tension. Totally normal until you get to know someone. Happens when you have to work with a stranger or new employee right? Same thing

    1|1
    0|0
  • Of course it's normal. If he's nervous that means he's into you. Guys wouldn't waste their time on a girl they not interested in.

    Most things are awkward in the beginning everything will take time. Just stay cute and be yourself.

    0|0
    0|0
  • It is a pretty normal way to react. Especially if you both like each other. You both are trying to find the right thing to say without coming off as abrupt or awkward. With a little time you will both become comfy with each other and things will feel more natural. Just have to rough it out a bit.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Sort of i think. You each are probably searching for a common subject. You shouldn't look for conversation. Find something fun to do together to help each other open uo and help your personalities show. I suggest a double date maybe with a few drinks at a public place. Maybe bowling..

    0|0
    0|0
  • All I know is if things feel negative things will not end up good. When things are good they feel good. Go for the good feeling and do not doubt yourself and not your feelings. Man can be nervous when they cheat or lie so do not feel sympathy. Your feelings are the most important that you feel right and good. Remember you are special and it is about you that you feel good about your self. If that is not the case things are wrong. He asked weird private questions. This happens to many times to people that it is almost obvious it is not good and we get a lot of cheated. If you like him you must be able to lose him. So dare to say more. And watch his reaction. Is he still that nice then or acting weird. Test people if you want to know more about them.

    1|0
    0|0
  • Yeah. Until you're both comfortable touching each other. So do more of that then you can build up to making out and more hehe

    1|0
    0|0
  • That is so normal. You were just excited. Just imagine he was your friend, how you treat him? Just try to have fun.

    1|0
    0|0
  • He's just over thinking everything cuz he likes you that's probably why he had direct questions he has probably spent all day thinking about what he is going to say to you

    1|0
    0|0
  • It's the nerves. When you see him... just say "hey... what have you been up too?" If he just says " nothing much" then you can say " hey! Me too!!, finally something we both have in common!" Just break the conversation into fun at the beginning. Then take it from there, the awkwardness will dissolve once the tension between the two of you are at ease and concentrating and focussing on both of you... not about family... the dogs name that's to early at the beginning of a start of a relationship.. unless you both are ok with it, it's cool. Just be yourself always! First impressions are the hardest... good luck.

    1|0
    0|0
  • Yes it's normal. Bit the problem with you women is that you expect way too much out of us guys. We have to do all the wooing while you just look pretty. So give him some slack

    1|0
    0|0
  • Sounds like both of you were a little nervous. Sounds pretty normal tho. Just need to get over that initial awkwardness.

    1|0
    0|0
  • I think it's very normal to be super nervous when you are first dating and really like a guy.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Should've just told him that thing about his eyes instead...

    1|1
    0|0
    • Seriously why don't they just say the compliments that come to their mind

    • Show All
    • Sorry, who are you? I was showing my agreement with Joe. If you don't understand reasons for using a rhetorical question I suggest you retake English

    • Chillax dude. 🤣

  • I would have said yes but I met someone recently and we clicked from day 1 so now I'd say it being awkward isn't a good sign

    0|0
    0|0
  • Creating that flow can be tricky. Though often it starts with a direct question. If there’s not something immediately apparent about you then it come from “how are you” type questions. You can make statements about environment. You can make statements about what you want to do or your situation. Like it’s not weird to mention you’ve got a song stuck in your head, the context is this song just pops into your mind all the time and it’s annoying so bringing it up randomly makes sense. Next thing you know you’re talking about music.

    1|0
    0|0
  • Definitely normal, get him alone and throw him a corny pick up line like "how much does a polar bear weight... enough to break the ice" lol its corny but it'll ease the awkwardness.

    0|0
    0|0
  • It depends how u take it.. it's not necessary the other person have same way of thinking or personality or habits.. just like u not like direct questions... first time u met u were attracted to each other.. now u r in next phase exploring each other... there may be differences but key is take things with open mind and heart... may be some thing u not like or he not like... in next stage u will decide to go forward or not on these things... it take time when u with new person and understand each other q

    1|0
    0|0
  • Be direct with him. Tell him right now you are not comfortable to discuss such personal things at the moment. And please get your head off the clouds!

    1|0
    0|0
  • Yes dear it is normal. Many of people react like this at first time. They feel nervous. After to know him you feel better.

    1|0
    0|0
  • Aww. That’s sweet. lol Ya, it’s perfectly normal for early dates to go like that.

    1|0
    0|0
  • Sure, you were both nervous, he's probably stressing it more than you

    1|0
    0|0
  • Oh yah it's Normal to feel awkward at the beginning he's just feeling you out

    1|0
    0|0
  • It's normal for things to be awkward when dating, like not knowing what to say or what to do. The first date is always great, because there's no commitment, no former feelings, nothing like that. You just act like yourself, and see how things play out, and if they don't, then that's it. For you, who had a blast on the first date a sort of tension has formed, because both of you want to live up to the expectations of the first date. To help this, be sincere with what you feel, and give the guy a chance/vice versa. Hope this helps.

    1|0
    0|0
  • It happens. For me it usually means, that i dont have much to talk about with this person. And (again, for me) usually it doesn't become much better.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Yes it is normal. You both will slowly learn to warm up to each other as you guys spend more time together

    0|0
    0|0
Show More
60

Recommended myTakes

Loading...