Why is it ok to not date someone for their height but unacceptable for their weight?

I'm all for personal choice so I'm for you can refuse anyone for any reason.

However it seems socially unacceptable to not date someone because the are overweight but acceptable to not date someone short or too tall.

Last time I checked you could change your weight but not your height. Shouldn't it be the other way around?

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Most Helpful Guys

  • That’s just because fat people are angry that 10/10 supermodels don’t want to date them. If you’re fat, you’re not gonna date someone hot by being fat. Stop being mad and lose weight, or stop being shallow yourself, expecting a hottie to want to marry you. Ya know? Lol. Everyone wants a 10, but 10s only want other 10s. You don’t see fat people getting mad at 10s for not being fat. You see them listing after the 10s and wondering why they don’t want you. It’s a crazy mentality in my view.

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  • The patriarchy reinforces that men should be taller in a relationship and people fall for it.

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    • Personally I want a taller woman. I don't think it a patriarchal fault but it's definitely a problem.

      ( For people who think this is a hypocritical statement re-read the first sentence)

Most Helpful Girls

  • I won't date anybody fat. And people need to realise difference between alittle chubby or bigger build and just plain fat. If I know you just abit larger in your body or alittle chubby. That's fine. But if you just plain fat. That shows me a few things. You lazy. You don't care about being healthy. You have no desire to look appealing to your lover. So no I will not date you. Fat isn't beautiful its just fuckin lazy.

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    • Agree 100% fat is not attractive.

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    • @A-man-22 I think that's my problem. I've been a vegetarian for months now, and I still barely lose weight. I eat maybe 1,200 calories a day at the most (usually less).

      Most people don't care about the "health" though. They just want something nice to look at.

    • I see your point. I'm a huge guy who lifts, runs, exercises six times a week, but I have some stomach to trim. However, many people are overweight due to a variety of reasons out of control. It depends on the person.

      To be honest, I'm not sure how many people ACTUALLY care about "health." I think they use "health" as an excuse to be superficial. People should just admit they don't find someone aesthetically pleasing, and leave it at that.

      Honestly, if you met a guy with an ideal body, but he had a slew of health issues, you would reject him due to his health issues? On the contrary, what if a guy was obese, but surprisingly (yes, it happens), had no health issues? Just be honest: It's what LOOKS good, not what the health issues are.

  • You can date who ever you want with no explanation. It is a preference.

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    • I get hell on here because of my preferences.

    • Totally agree , you should look for who you like. However if you have lots of preferences don't expect it to be quick.

    • Of course. But I don’t think anyone should be shamed for their preferences.

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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • It could be that because height is an uncontrollable quality, it's "okay" not to date someone since there is no possibility of change.
    Weight, however, can change very drastically and so personal preferences on weight shouldn't be as important, which is why it is less "justified" to not look past it.
    Though this is just a shot in the dark 😶

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    • I don't get your reasoning.
      Surely because you can't change your height it should be perceived as shallow to want a specific height.

      But for weight while it does take effort most people can get to and reasonable weight they want.

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    • I understand. My point is, people rarely permanently lose significant weight. Also, it wouldn't make sense to me to date someone I'm unattractive to due to how that could theoretically change if they lose weight.

    • Another way to put that is like I'll date a girl that I don't like her personality because if she worked very hard on personal growth, I might like her personality at that point. I'd rather date the person I already like.

  • I've noticed it just the opposite. The men I meet, and on here have a man-baby tantrum if a woman rejects a short guy, and if someone doesn't date a girl due to her weight, people think it's just fine. Of course, if a fat man is rejected due to his weight, he throws a hissy fit, and the other men support him-as they shame fat girls.

    I'm 5'6, won't date a guy shorter than men, and I love tall men. But I also love fat guys lol.

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  • Bro wtf are u talking about? The other way around? Height is genetic and weight is controllable. And moreover il say it loud and clear Fat people look ugly to me i won't date them.

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    • Yes that's what I said. height is not changeable but weight is.

    • But weight is genetic too and it s hard to control t

    • Weight is slightly genetic, metabolism etc can cause over/underweight but through exercise or diet most people can make change to their weight.

      Height you cannot change no matter what.

  • What country do you live in where it is socially unacceptable to turn down someone because of their weight?

    If an overweight chick comes up to me I see no problem in telling her im not interested in her for her weight.
    Its the truth, deal with it. Being fat is not sexy to me. Being attracted to your partner is NOT optional. you'll be hard pressed to find a guy who is saying, "idc about her looks, Im attracted to her personality". That's not shallow, that's just the way men have evolved.

    Now with women its different, I'd say women can be attracted to a fat short ugly guy's confidence. If he acts righteously, she'll legit want to fuck him. Mind you not all girls, but there are absolutely women out there who find that sexy. Its in a woman's nature to just know that their man can take care of them, is capable, etc.

    All that being said, a height insult does not come off as offensively as a weight one. I can think of a few reasons for this, but as other people have said, you can't change your height. This means its a shitty insult, a short person won't take it personally, like there is nothing they could do about it, so its not their fault for how you feel and they won't feel bad.

    Where as the fat person, is thinking, "Damn, I wish I weren't fat." And so socially, people pick up on that and dont want to hurt that persons feelings.

    Being fat is def more obviously unattractive for the fat person.

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  • I think it's totally acceptable not to date someone who doesn't physically attract you. There are people attracted to girls/guys who are overweight or underweight, others are not. So there shouldn't be a problem in my opinion. People have the right to have a personal preference. No one can force what you like.

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  • Thank you woman in general say I want a tall guy because it’s cute when i tippy toe to kiss him well guess what all that is just superficial bull shit that’s been brain fed to make woman think that way that tall men are everything and that is short people are treated like shit just because we are not tall or what society claims we look like teenager who stunt growth or if we walk with a female they will feel like they with their little brother sorry to burst most females bubbles but stop thinking that way no wonder u always butch moan and complain why can’t I find a good man when u do you go and treat that person who may not have height but is loyal honest would treat you like a queen what would you do in return fck another man behind his back and give the worlds most stupidest excuse saying ohh we can’t love you if I don’t value my self first or you too nice of a guy you deserve better start using your brain woman and stop going by what society tells you to go after jesus fucking Christ

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  • To be honest I believe that when it comes to dating it's the only occasion when you should be allowed to discriminate based on absolutely anything and everything. Weight, height, gender , race , age, disability... just go for whatever you like and whatever makes you happy

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  • Because people can’t change their height but can their weight

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    • Then it should be that it's unacceptable to not date someone because of the height as you can't change it.

    • Ya that’s what I’m saying

  • I can't see that attitude anywhere... I think you're confusing people talking about fat shaming.

    Do you have an example where someone has said you should date fat people despite your own preference? I ask because I don't think what you're claiming is true...

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  • Not really, it shouldn't be the other way around, because people should be able to have their preferences regardless to what they are. You are absolutely well within your right to prefer what you prefer. The trick is finding someone that you prefer who prefers you.

    I think it is ok to not date someone if they are too tall or too short for your preferences, and I also think it is ok to pass on someone who is not the body type that you prefer.

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  • Social expectations. People have expectations when someones chooses their partner like someone beautiful with someone handsome because otherwise, others will view the couple as unmatched or so. Hence, it is solely due to what people expect of couples nowadays

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  • You can grind the pounds down but fat land whales don't wanna do that so they'll sit and eat 20 bags of doritos with a slice of cake and claim to be a BBW

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  • Both are considered shallow in my country and not acceptable so people just lie about their reasons for rejecting someone.

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  • Women have physical preferences for men, but then they love to shame men for having physical preferences as well. This happens constantly.

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  • Since anyone has got any different type I dont see there a problem. (Little cheat here: If you want to let somebody down politly then just say that they are a bit to small instead to say that they weight to much

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  • In theory, yes. Most peoples problem is oversensitivity. People as a general rule will be VERY sensitive about their weight, and not so much their height. Therefore, anytime anyone says anything at all that could be interpreted as negative in regards to weight they get all offended and cr@p. I'm completely with you about the free choice and dating or not dating for whatever reason you want. I think people just take it too personally. I wouldn't date someone overweight myself. This isn't meant to be taken personally, and it's nothing against the person themself. I'm simply not attracted to them, and without mutual attraction there is no relationship.

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  • I think it's absolutely acceptable to reject somone based on weight or height

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  • I agree with what you are saying. You can change your weight, not your height.

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  • Date whoever you want... Who cares about adjusting your life to be "Socially Acceptable".

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  • Groups with womens' interests yell much louder

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  • I agree dude

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  • I guess height is fixed, weight is not.

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  • Never heard of such social rules. Seriously.

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  • just the way it is

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  • I haven't heard of these things early

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  • Since when is it 'unacceptable' to date people who are over weight? Weight, or height, or anything doesn't matter if you truly love them person. If it matters them it's not love but infatuation

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