Does exgirlfriend saying "You can keep trying" when referring to me trying to win her back mean she wants to get back together?

My girlfriend dumped me nearly a month ago. I was too clingy, obsessive, And drank too much. Since the breakup, I have been sober and will continue to be. I made mistakes and begged for second chances; she blocked me, unblocked me, then blocked me again. We are unblocked now and talking. She says things like "I don't love you anymore", "Us won't happen again.", or "You blew all your chances." But her actions sometimes speak differently. She cuddles when she sleeps over (Yes she sleeps over), we held hands in the mall the other day, we have had sex, and she called me "her boo" to her gay best friend. She also will come over to my place unannounced. She let slip once that she "really missed me." When I brought it up, she said "I was talking about the sex", but I think that was a save. Last night, we were cuddling and she admitted I am moving too fast. She brought up how us can't happen again and I've hurt her too much. Instead of begging, I calmly expressed that I agree with her decision to end the relationship. Also that I deserved the hurtful words that have been said out of anger. But I did say I can't deny my feelings for you; I still care about you and love you and want to be with you and won't stop trying even if it takes years. She then said "... fine you can keep trying but no more cuddling, sleepovers, or kissing." She then left, And haven't talked since. I don't want to be friendzoned, So how should I approach the next few days? Thanks in advance, And please be polite in your responses.

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  • You mentioned you were too clingy and obsessive before, so if I was you I'd do the opposite and just play it cool. Stop caring so much about getting back together and just let whatever happens happen, ya know? The fact that you're still thinking about a relationship with her and are willing to post questions about it on an app/site like this says you're still a little obsessive about her. So if you can learn to stop caring about what could be and just let everything happen how it should then I think you'll be an overall happier person and do better in future relationships. Also, its weird and I really don't understand it, but women tend to respond better when you act like you're not interested or don't care about being with them either way. It's not like playing hard to get, but more like doing you and living your life carefree. Women are naturally drawn to men who are like that cause it takes a lot of confidence and self-control to live like that. It may seem like you're being kinda mean at times, but believe me, it will work in your favor.

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    • Thanks for the answer I appreciate it. I get what you're saying too. I definitely don't want to ignore her persay, but maybe I am making myself a little too available? To where she knows she can always fall back on me or know I'm always there waiting.

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    • I mean I may be overthinking this, but if I didn't want to get back with someone, I definitely wouldn't tell them they can "keep trying". What's your take on that?

    • Tbh, I interpret that as, "You can go ahead and keep trying, but it's pointless. Cause we are never getting back together!" That's how I read it.

  • Don't do anything.

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    • What do you mean?

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    • Don't talk to her at all. You should not be okay with the fact that she is unilaterally deciding the rules of your relationship. That is unacceptable.

      You're acting weak, and she is going to take advantage of you until she no longer requires your services. Yesterday she wanted to have sex, but today she doesn't want the responsibilities involved with that, so it's off the table until she decides she wants it again. That is totally unacceptable. You should be upset about it and confront her about it, not be sitting in the corner biting your nails hoping she will change her mind.

    • You need to iron out what it is you want - write it down on a piece of paper. Make a list of exactly what it is you want out of this relationship. Then when SHE CALLS YOU, you make plans to see her and you explain exactly what you want and tell her if she's not willing to give that to you then you're done. Tell her to call you back when she decides she wants what you want. Then you don't ever talk to her again unless she calls you. It's that simple.

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