What would you do if your s. o. dislikes your family or disrespects them?

By disrespecting, I mean not thinking about the boundaries/rules that they set, saying it's ridiculous or stupid etc. Would you stay together? Or is it a deal breaker

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Most Helpful Guys

  • Being in a relationship with someone means to accept them for who they are, including the family that they belong to! It's only natural that your parents and family members will want to know more about your significant other if you want to marry them one day! If my significant other isn't willing to respect and treat them right along with the boundaries and rules they set in place after I've warned them before, how can I expect them to be respectful to other people they'll meet in the future? I'd want a partner who's respectful, friendly and cooperative to everyone they meet so I can feel comfortable in knowing a fight won't break out constantly from disagreements they may come around!

    This certainly is a deal breaker for me because family will be there for you if anything went wrong! The last thing you'd want to do is burn your bridge with them and picking over your significant other just because of their selfish decision to resent them.

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    • Thank you for the answer

    • You're very welcome! No relationship can be healthy if there's resentment present in it whether your significant other disrespects your family members, close friends and/or your co-workers.

  • Family to me is a deal breaker... if your family circle is you and your s. o., then if you are ok with it, then fine... but you are giving up family ties. If you have st to g family ties and family support, the s. o. is disrespecting you as well as your family. If the s. o is unwilling to respect your ideals and your family... just say to your s. o. "and the horse you rode in on"... i am sure the first two words can be figured out... if not provide an educational moment.

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    • Thank you for the insight

Most Helpful Girls

  • part of being in a relationship is having to deal with stuff you might not like, he has to respect your familys rules and boundaries wheather he likes it or not. and to you the same with his family. if he respects you he will respect your family. talk to him, and if he keeps it that way, show him that your family is first, they were there before him

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  • That would be a deal breaker. Now the situation would be different if it was the other way around, if a family member didn't like them for just the person they are. But if I'm with someone and they don't respect my family, I see it as a you don't care enough to make an effort.

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    • I definitely understand it's ok if it's the other way around. But I agree. I think it's the lack of effort to try an understand or respect that different households has different rules.

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What Girls & Guys Said

1714
  • I’d have a word with them first. Let them know their behavior is disrespectful. If they continue that behavior then I’d consider leaving the relationship.

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  • If she refuses to at least act mature around them then yes its a deal breaker immediately however if she just doesn't like the rules they put in place and wants to talk about them or try to find some compromise or something other than just throwing a fit i would need to talk to her about it and see her side of things and talk things over with her

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  • If they dont respect your parents, they won't respect you either. Calling the rules ridiculous or stupid shows immaturity because that's exactly what teenagers do. I'd drop a guy for that if he didn't shape up.

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  • Dislikes I might be able to try to understand and cope with. I don’t love absolutely everything about people in my family. (Except for me grandma. She’s perfect lol) Showing disrespect however is a deal breaker. Starting a strong relationship with me is us starting to become part of each other’s families.

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  • Respect is earned, not given. If there is a valid reason for the lack of respect, then no, it should not impact anything. If the disrespect is irrational, then you should be reconsidering your life choices. As a side note, unless you live with your parents, they should not be setting standards for your decisions.

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  • He does dislike my family. They dislike him too. I stay with him because he treats me well, our relationship is super enjoyable and we make each other happy. As long as he doesn't constantly complain about them, it's not a deal breaker.

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  • I honestly couldn't. I love my family and how obnoxious they are. It's a big wedge if they dislike them, unless they tolerate it and deal with it then it's fine.

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  • I would immediately leave them if they disrespect my family. Only proves he can disrespect me in the future

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  • That's my family - the most important people in my life, and if he can't respect them then wheres the guarantee that after some time he won't think my rules are stupid or ridiculous and disrespect me?

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  • Not a deal breaker but if he crosses the limit then it's a deal breaker. Like if he starts disrespecting then and hurting them

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  • He can dislike them all he wants, but he will respect them.

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    • How do you force someone to respect your parents? Honestly. How honourable and dignified do your parents have to be for you to be able to "force" people into respecting them? Respect is earned. Through actions and through accomplishments. If your parents do not deserve the respect, don't be surprised when they don't receive it. On the other hand, if they do, you should not have to force your significant other to behave a certain way.

    • Either you respect them or you don't. If they can't be respectful, they're not worth being in a relationship with. I'm not forcing anyone to do anything.

  • I would break up or at least talk to them saying that if they keep on disrespecting your family you'll end things

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  • Two sided. Pay attention to the signs to see if they are disrespectful as well.

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  • It is kind of a deal breaker... both family and partner should be understanding!!

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  • I think its however you personally take it or your family takes it

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  • That's a deal breaker for me.

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  • I would leave that person

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  • I would consider for break up

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  • I'd give her the boot.

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  • Leave.

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  • Nothing

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  • Deal breaker

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  • Depends on wether your family respects them

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  • If they don't like my family, nope.

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  • Pray allah

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  • No go.

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  • I'll keep respecting them all the time

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  • Deal breaker, goodbye lol

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  • deal breaker

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  • Nah, i don't think you really have to continue with that. It should be important to give respect to your family. If she can't respect them, then there's no way she'll respect you now or in the near future. It's a deal breaker. But hear her out first, ask her why is she acting that way, you have to know her side, too. And talk it over. If nothing changes, then it's totally a deal breaker.

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  • Well, I don't like my bfs sister AT ALL. She met me and instantly didn't like me. Since I'm dating and had a child with her older brother (just a year younger than him) who baby's her, she just always has been jealous of the attention I get from my man and just treated me like I'm temporary. She argued with me once and told me to get my own family (which I was trying to start one with her brother lol and we had our daughter year later 👊) and threatened to beat my ass (my boyfriend, her brother knows I can actually beat some ass) and since she lived with us, he had to keep the peace cause he still wanted to be with me.

    Now a few days ago my sister and my boyfriend got into an argument while I was at the store and she kicked him out (we all rent together), needless to say he's still my man and she realized she was in the wrong and said he could come back. I honestly would never let a family member of mine disrespect my man.. especially in front of me. He's my family that I chose and want to build with... I would drop my unchosen and toxic family in a heartbeat for him..

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