Maybe I just need to suck it up?

So I've recently come to terms with my sexuality. I am asexual. I am a shy and introverted lady, so going out to bars and clubs aren't my thing! I want to take a stab at online dating, but something about meeting with someone off the Internet scares me.

Any tips or advice for getting over this ridiculous fear?

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Always have a friend sit a table or two away when meeting someone from the internet. Always meet in daylight if possible, and always in a public place. Have a fully charged cell phone. Drive yourself, so you're not dependent on them for a ride. Talk for at least several weeks before meeting in person. Watch for red flags in conversation. Don't tell them where you live. Try and get full name and birthdate so you can run a background check for criminal record. Can usually get this by asking them to friend you on facebook. Just be careful what you have on YOUR profile if you do that. Also, if online dating ends up being too stressful, might try a book club or something similar to meet people.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Are you saying you're asexual because you're shy and introverted? Just clearing it up some lol
    I wouldn't be too scared about meeting someone online. They have tons of ways of verifying before you ever meet via video chat, phone calls, pictures on social media etc.

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What Girls & Guys Said

37
  • Talk to the person online for awhile before meeting and then meet up with him at least the first few times in a public place and stay there. If he's a creep he's not gonna spend all that time getting to know you.

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    • Also- before you go on a date, let a friend know where you're gonna be going so someone knows where you are. Maybe even have a tracker on your phone for the dates so someone else is looking out for you

  • Are you sure? Don't blame me for being skeptical, this is my first time learning about this. And I'd like to state that you'll have to tell your partner about your sexuality whenever starting a serious relationship or maybe just sexually please him or her

    I'm sorry if my opinion doesn't help. It's just that it's the first time in my life someone made me feel stupid. It's a sickening feeling for me to experience.

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    • I'm also introverted but not shy though, I had to get over that by of course talking to strangers who eventually became friends I hardly hangout with

  • Remember

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  • Nike, " just do it."

    But seriously just do it, get all nervous and sweaty n shit, have awkward small talks, and then do it again. Being comfortable in uncomfortable situations will be the new norm for you.

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  • Try it before you rule it out. Stop thinking of what could go wrong and think of what could go right.

    Based on this, I don't think you're asexual; you haven't met the right person yet.

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  • I have tried online dating, and if you have the results I've had, you have nothing to fear except"why did I spend all that money for nothing"

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  • You don't need to suck it first. You can do that eventually, but yes you need a man inside you

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  • Wow. Umm, okay..

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  • It’s not ridiculous to feel nervous. Not in this world.

    If I feel unsafe going somewhere, but still want to go, I have several precautions that I take.

    I will share my location on my phone with several people that I trust, give someone a certain time at which to call me to ensure that I get home safe, and will share the name and a photo of whoever I’m going to be with people I trust. Just in case.

    I hope this helps!

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