Would you be okay with your S. O. remaining friends with someone who rejected them?

My boyfriend and I have been together for a year, and he has this female friend whom he has lots in common with. He made a move on her three years ago, but she turned him down pretty firmly, but they still remain close friends today. He's been rejected by other girls before, but he no longer talks to them. What's so special about this particular girl, and would you be okay with your S. O. remaining friends with someone who'd rejected them?

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Most Helpful Guy

  • It would depend on what I was seeing in their interaction. My girlfriend has frequent contact with one of her exes and is connected on social media with a few others. I have social media connection with one of mine also. We're both fine with that because we are confident that neither of us has any romantic interest in any of those people.

    If, however, I saw her bring flirty with any of those guys, then I would not be happy and would want her to stop being in contact with him.

    People's feelings change over time. Just because he wanted to be with her then doesn't mean he wants it now. He could just like her as a friend. I was friends with one of my exes for several years after our romantic relationship ended and had no desire to restart the romantic part. She even came to my wedding because my (now ex) wife felt confident that it was just a friendship and nothing more.

    I guess what I'm saying is that you need to assess it based on the current situation, not what happened years ago. If they really are just friends, then I think that's fine. If there's anything flirty going on though, then that's a problem.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Depends on how close.. if they go out and do things together then yes I will mind but if it is just someone who they see at parties or with mutual friends etc then it is not a issue.

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What Girls & Guys Said

49
  • Maybe they are just good friends so it doesn't matter that he once had feelings.

    My girlfriend is still good friends with guys I know she's had sex with / given head to etc.. Doesn't really make any difference what has happened in the past, they are just friends and I know that!

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  • They're still friends because he genuinely liked/likes her as a person. There are a few women that I have asked out... honestly just because I was bored and I was looking for a way to kill an evening. Sometimes I thought things were going somewhere, sometimes I didn't.

    Ask any guy though, sometimes we go after women because we don't know that we don't want more than what we already have with her. Sometimes it takes either her rejection, or a crappy relationship with her to find that out.

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  • Be confident in your self if something is going on between them the shit stinks by it self so don’t worry about it just do you do good and if anything you’ll move on to someone better and he will realize how good you were after he lost you

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  • Only if he's move on and doesn't have any feelings towards her anymore

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  • Yeah I would be okay with it, trust is important and also I will assume he is over it after 3 fucking years

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  • Pls kick your boyfriend out of your life this guy definitely compare your moves with that girl and waiting for that girl 's consideration to become his lover

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  • He keeps in contact for one reason only - the possibility of sex

    He isn't her friend and has no intention of being that.

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  • I think you're being insecure, 1 year in a relationship is not 1 month, it takes some work, also, he made a move on her 2 years before you were in his life.
    They probably barely even recall it happening.

    People can have flings, crushes and even relationships and come out of it with strong friendship bonds.
    Being rejected just established the type of relationship they can have, friendship.

    Your boyfriend is probably a decently confident guy, confident people don't take rejection as a negative or bad experience, rather as a part of life, it doesn't decrease your value or demean you in anyway, it just serves to establish bounds and explore possibilities.

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  • Your just a rebound. I would consider running as fast as you can.

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  • Yeah

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  • Nope.

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  • 1 on 1, no. Group of people is fine

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  • NO WAY LOL

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