Why would my date insist on splitting the bill?

I mean, since I’m the one who’s taking her out, I should be the one to pay, right?

Am I just a friend then?

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Awwwe you are sooooo sweet..

    "am I just a friend then?"

    Most adorable read ever on here.

    No, this feminist movement makes women who let the men pay out to be gold digging codependent spoiled bitches.

    So they are telling us to always split the bill which ruins the guys romantic gesture.

    Nothing personal to you, she just didn't want you to think she was a gold-digging, codependent, spoiled bitch is all.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Could be any number of things. Just assume that's her value system and don't over think it. I dated more than one feminist who were adamant about paying for themselves and in each case it was definitely not a "just friends" scenario. Take the win and be happy it's a girl that believes investing in you too. Your time is enough for her. You don't have to pay for her to spend time with you.

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What Girls & Guys Said

1223
  • No - I think she is worried you will feel you are entitled to sex if you pay for her

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    • That’s a gross generalisation of men - a myth. I don’t think there’s many guys, if any guy at all, who expects sex from a girl if he pays for the first date. It’s not fair on us.

  • I literally always propose to split to bill, and not just to be polite or expecting him to pay it anyway. I would actually want to split it, because it doesn't imply that I either can't take care of myself, or that I just said yes to the date because it would mean a free meal/cinema ticket...
    That doesn't indicate anything about how I thought the date went.

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  • She might feel uncomfortable, like she owes you something "else" or simply doesn't like to have her stuff/meal paid for by anyone but herself.

    Many guys (not saying all of them) complain about paying the bill and not getting anything so women picked up on that.

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  • Some people are just uncomfortable with people paying for things for them. Im like that sometimes. It doesn't mean she doesn't want a romantic relationship with you.

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  • If they choose to pay it'll probably be because they are considerate or want to not feel like a burden, if someone insists just let them, but make sure you express a lot that it was a date and try to go on more, and insist that you pay the full bill sometimes and see what happens, and if they insist back then ask them why

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  • True. I agree. Not all men feel they are 'entitled' to sex if they pay for dinner or drinks... At the same time, not all women feel that the man SHOULD HAVE to pay, either.

    A girl who wants to split a check might be trying to indicate that she enjoys spending time with you - just because its you - rather than because the end result (the dinner) is benefiting her.

    In the same way that you are trying to show her your iniative (you asked her out you're the one who pays); she's trying to show you her self sufficiency (she CAN take care of herself and won't be a drain on your wallet). I'm not saying either side is right or wrong but it's just a different way of looking at it.

    If it bothers you mention it a date or two in once a relationship starts forming.

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  • She could like you even though she is splitting the bill. Maybe she wanted to split the bill and felt bad having you pay for the whole date.

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  • Because she wants an equal relationship where you don't hold resentment because you pay for everything. Maybe she is making more money than you why should you have to pay for her? If you are on a date together it's not taking her out and she is enjoying it.

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  • I'd be happy if she wanted to split the bill, I'd insist once just to be a gentleman, if she kept her frame then yeah, split, don't want her to feel like she owes me anything.
    Don't stress about it dude

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  • Because she knows how men hate paying for dates now a days and secretly thinks a woman is a gold diggers if he has to pay.

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  • You are so lucky but you are oblivious to it, in my country if you dont pay the bill, clothes, jewels, father's debts, mother's spa, cats food and neighborhoods electricity then consider the date a failure.
    No wonder im still single..

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  • To be fair. To keep you from thinking she owes you anything. Because it's 2018 and she can.

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  • I'd always split the bill, I absolutely hate owing people stuff especially money, means absolutely nothing about the date it's just the way I am

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  • No second date -> just a friend

    Second date -> She learned feminism and think she is doing the right thing. Be happy you saved 5$

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  • She doesn't want you to think you're a boyfriend and some women think because you pay, that she is tied to you somehow. Other women don't think anything of it

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  • If she wants to pay half then let her pay half.
    there's no ill meaning to this. She probably want wants to pay her share of the weight in the date ( relationship =teamwork) or is being polite.

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  • She could be brainwashed by feminists into thinking men have no value.

    Or she could not want to disappoint you by never seeing you again.

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  • I always ask to split the bill. It's sort of matter of pride and balance in relationship

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  • I will ask to split or pay just to see if the guy will ultimately let me. If he doesn't, then I know not to pursue anything further

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  • Maybe she feels awkward about you paying? Or she likes her independence? Nothing with splitting the bill. Just go along with it.

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  • Some women are weird about feeling like they owe the person something. Just be cool and see where the night goes.

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  • No some women like to be independant :) or been raised to be independant. It means nothing

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  • She trying to help you out and showing that y'all relationship is a team work it's not one sided

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  • They don't want there to be any feeling of obligation.

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  • Because your date probably wants u to know they can reciprocate your actions of compassion. afterall aren't we supposed to do 50/50 in relationships

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  • Yes, she doesn't want to be obligated start a relationship or feel she owes you. So she wants to pay.

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  • I don't know about you but I like a woman who is half on everything

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  • Consider yourself lucky, you may have found a keeper.

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  • Yeah that true but maybe your date just feels bad about u paying the whole thing

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  • They don't want to"owe" you because you provided sustinence.

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  • Perhaps...
    See what happens on the second date

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  • Because feminism.

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  • Shut up and consider yourself lucky!

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  • If it's an official date he's a cheap bastard.

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  • Yeah, it's typically not a great sign, but not necessarily the end of the world. Did you kiss her after the date? That's the surest way to know how she sees the interaction.

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