What to do if you don't know how to have sex?

It sounds sad but really I don't know. Never done it before. I don't even know how you get to the point where a girl wants to have sex with you, and if I get there somehow, I feel like I don't actually know what to do or where to start.

It sucks because everyone says don't worry about it don't worry about but I will be worrying about it when I'm much older fumbling around with a woman who expects me to know what I'm doing

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Most Helpful Girl

  • To be honest, you might want to take pornos with a grain of salt. Yes, they can show you positions/techniques. So can the Kama Sutra. But pornos can be a little misleading. Not EVERY girl likes doing what the girl in the video likes. Not EVERY girl acts like that when she's enjoying herself. And not EVERY guy is hung like the ones in videos (and girls don't EXPECT you to be). So, yes, they can be helpful to a certain extent but they can also be very misleading on what sex actually is - especially for a first time. In my opinion, as far as informational quality - chose the book version over the movie.

    Secondly, do you have a girl in mind already and are trying to broach the subject? Or is this more of a hypothetical question?

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    • Both, a girl had mentioned it but has been very wishy washy about it so probably won't happen. but of course eventually I want to happen with someone. A lot of my friends got experience at 15-16. I'm 21. I have no idea what I'm doing

    • It's not that weird. I know there's a lot of pressure on guys to have sex "as soon as possible" and not to treat it like it's a big thing. But YOU don't. It's YOUR life, so shouldn't your sex life be about making YOU feel comfortable and happy with yourself - and not waste a really good relationship with a girl because of guy pressure?

    • There's a lot of reasons why should could be 'very wishy washy'. She could be a virgin too. Or maybe it's early in the relationship and she doesn't want you to think less of her. Maybe she's had some bad experiences. What's the relationship like?

Most Helpful Guy

  • Ask again when you have a partner and is about to lose your virginity.

    It's easier to give opinions when you describe your background and the girl you'll be sleeping with, like whether she s also a virgin.

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What Girls & Guys Said

12
  • Not everyone is a natural. Some take longer then others to get it going. But if she's the right one for the first time. You'll know. She gives off signs or sometimes just straight tells you. And this may be over the deep end but watch some videos. Start small work your way up. Just don't jump in if you're worried about performance or sucking your first time. It takes time

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  • Try to check out porn bc that will show you the basic steps

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  • Most people don't KNOW what they do. They just do. And that's all about it. Not only with sex.

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