How do you tell a guy you don’t like the way he kisses?

Talking to this guy I kinda like but his kisses kinda suck it feels like he’s licking my face and he wants to always use tongue I don't know how to tell him I really don’t like that without hurting his feelings

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Most Helpful Guys

  • Grab him by the collar and tell him that this is how you like to kiss and kiss him that way. Teach him what you prefer.

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  • If some lady told me my kissing sucks and she dislikes kissing me than what's the point of us even dating? Who wants to be with someone who thinks that about them? No one does.

    I'd say unless you do this right and with a lot of tact than he'll leave and you won't have this problem anymore. The way to do it is never tell him you don't like how he kisses. The trick is to give lots of pleasant feed back while kissing of things you do like. Say something like "Do you know what I really like... I love it when you do this while kissing me" Whatever it is start giving him little tips of things you like, "Oooh put your tongue in deeper or I like when you hardly use your tongue at all", "please open your mouth more when you kiss me or I love it when you kiss me with your mouth just open a little." Be assertive, be passionate, grab his head with both of your hands and give him a kiss the way you love it and tell him, "kiss me life this and you'll put me in ecstasy", "oooh, close, how about a little more like this... oh yes, I love that" "keep being positive, keep giving tips of what you like, tell him when he gets it right and before no time he'll be kissing you in the way he loves. Never once should you say "I don't like how you kiss" Train him to kiss you in the way you like with passionate suggestions... reward him all the way into being your ideal kisser.

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Most Helpful Girls

  • I had this problem and no matter what its not going to make him feel good.
    I just said let me lead the kiss. It took a few tries before he got what I was saying. Even after he stopped eatting my face, It didn't particularly feel like a good kiss. We didn't last long. Maybe the fact our kisses didn't go well was a sign we weren't a match.

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  • I dated a guy like that. I argued using tongue all the time was not ok. He would literally hit my tonsils. I married that guy. He never took my advice and is probably kissing his new girlfriend poorly right about now. Currently I'm kissing a new guy and he's so good at it and I think I like him better then my ex husband who I wasted 13 years with.

    Ie. Move on now. It won't "get better".

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What Guys Said 75

  • Sound like he's licking a metling icecream... just be upfront and say it directly.. bcz considering his age.. seems like nobody did before and he's still doing it.. ..

    you suck at kissing, you're grossing me out man.. you kiss like a monkey hehehe

    No just kidding.. but if situation requires you being serious.. do no hesitate !

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  • Don't say "I don't like the way you kiss", say "I like it even more when you do this" and show him what you want and describe it. I showed my wife what I like by licking her finger, and that was enough for her to understand. Communication wins!

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  • The worst thing you can do is saying nothing. He will think he's doing a good job unless you say or imply otherwise.

    Communicate with him, directly tell him, or tell him how YOU like to be kissed (he should then change to accompany that new knowledge) - if that doesn't work, straight up tell him & if that still doesn't work, well you've got a problem on your hands.

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  • Just be honest, but you don't have to say specifically "I don't like the way you kiss", but instead make it about you. Like, "let me show you something about kissing, I really like this..." or "I enjoy this the most, can we try it?"

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  • Wow, I feel for ya because I've been there a few times. It's nearly impossible to change the way one kisses (in my experience) you either got it or you don't.
    As far as talking to him about it? You will probably hurt his feelings and his ego regardless of how you approach the subject... but if you really like the guy give it a shot. Good luck.

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  • Kind and good communication is the number one thing, the only way for him to know what you like and don't like is for you to tell him in a kind way. Tell him your not angry, you just don't like that way of kissing. I would want to please a woman and not kiss in a way she didn't like.

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  • i think the best way is to tell him straight up, he seems to be inexperienced at kissing/making out. he might get a bit mad or embarrassed about it but later he will thank you for it and you can teach him.

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  • You should be upfront with him and let him know there is a certain way you like to be kissed. Turn the whole thing into a little game where you kiss him how you like to be kissed, then he tries to mimic the way you kissed him. Go back and forth until he gets it.

    Remember, practice makes perfect. 😘

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  • Bring it up.

    Be gentle with his feelings, sure.

    Different people like different things. Maybe his last girlfriend liked the way he kisses, so he thinks that he's doing it "right", when the reality is that there is no universal "right way"... Just right for you.

    The conversations that we avoid see the ones that tend to be the most productive.

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  • He is never going to tell anyone that you didn’t like his kiss, so yeah teach him and be firm but not blunt. I like that sit him down and tell him to copy everything you do and then review what you learned

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  • Don't do anything you don't like, be straight forward.
    follow this simple rule in your life and you will be always happy.
    Good luck in your life

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  • Frankly, you should just tell me. Politely, and genuinely. Show that you are saying this because you care about your thing and not just because you are finding faults.
    Find him in a good mood and say it in the lightest possible manner, with a smile.
    I'm sure he'd understand.

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  • Tell him you want to kiss him the way you want it, in a super sexy voice.
    Remember, us men were blessed with a brilliant mind, to wisen our fellows, and a penis to give them great pleasure. The universe decided that we were a little OP, and made sure we only had enough blood supply to operate one of them correctly at once. He won't be able to get pissed once his switch is flipped up. 😂😂😂

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  • A good way to do this is find a light movie kiss and tell him you really like it and want to duplicate it. That way he won't second guess himself in fact it will be an ego boost because he will see you puting him in movie star status. After he does it make sure to tell him how much you like it and he will continue to duplicate it.

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  • Slowly go slower without making it obvious. Be a little more dominant sexually, and he'll probably give in to what you're doing.

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  • Tell him you saw a kiss in a movie that you want to try out. Then you can "instruct" him on how to do it right, no feelings hurt.

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  • Well you grab his face and and tell him to imitate everything you do. Then kiss him how you want to be kissed and then let him show you what he learned.

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  • Ok I put myself in this guy's shoes , I'd like to hear like this " I think we would enjoy kissing more if you did *insert how you want him to do it * " I think that's a nice and mature way of saying it

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  • Just be honest and kind. Explain that your not tying to bruise his ego and be empathetic to his inevitable hurt feelings

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  • Easy, break up with him and cite the reason "it's cuz your kiss make me feel. like your name vacuum trying to suck my face off".

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What Girls Said 33

  • Ooooooooo, that's always fun, because then you get to teach him :D

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  • Just say to him I like it slow and then try to guide him without him knowing you're doing that, if he doesn't follow your motion and still sucks I'd dump him. Same with people who don't follow my lead in bed, I don't tell the man what to do, I just find tactful ways of leading him and they usually catch on, if they don't I dip, men have big egos and if you bruise it all he wants to do id get back at you.

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  • There is no right way to give someone negative feedback.

    You could try teaching him what you like by saying, "hey, I want (you) to try something..." Then tell him exactly what to do to you.

    But some people are just bad kissers.

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  • Its hard to say they suck in kissing, mostly when they didn't know them, better not kiss him , and he will wonder why. Wait until he ask you then, tell him can i teach you how to kiss.

    Its better to lead than to be lead

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  • Just suggest to him and then show him and take the lead first. Um tongue is normally involved with kissing and is very pleasurable my dear lol. They are not playful licks to the face? lol Sometimes those are fun too lol.

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  • I get that being upfront and honest can be helpful and constructive... but if I were you I would just try to take the lead and do to him what you want him to do to you. Maybe in the middle of kissing you can stop for a second and smile at him, then you initiate and try to dictate the course of the make out. Show not tell I guess

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  • You can lead the kiss and ask him if he wouldn't want to try using less tongue or kissing a certain way. It's fine to directly tell him you don't like his way of kissing you.

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  • Oh my god. GIRL, I had the same problem. I even told him about it, and he still did the same thing. You can either accept it because you love him, or break up with him because you can't tolerate it.

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  • Just tell him or he won’t get better. This is where communication comes in handy

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  • Don't say anything. Show Joe... With your own Show of Hands. xx

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  • Simply ask for no tongue 😂 literally just tell your partner.

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  • Just tell him. I've done that before. I actually made a guy I liked watch a video to show him how to kiss.

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  • I climbed ontop of him, grabbed his face in both hands, tilted it & whispered "follow me" 😉 Best kiss he ever had, according to him.

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  • Maybe say that you want to try different techniques as it would be more fun and you can experiment , then hopefully he will learn to kiss better

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  • Oh man... that's a tough one. I would probably tell him directly. That way you'll give him a chance to improve.

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  • This happened with my ex and I... it's really hard to communicate something like that. Anxious to read the results.

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  • Tell his to play a game with you and make him imitate your way of kissing

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  • So you dont like to use the tongue? Does a person like tgat really exist?

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  • I had to tell him I am sorry. It was werid n my fault!

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  • Don’t let him lead while kissing. Hopefully he’ll follow.

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