Thank you for the MHO :)
Exactly! It’s like good thing I didn’t 😂
Exactly Hans its normal for people to get ignored, and i get ignored as well when i message guys sometimes and it is okay because we know it happens to most people, so behaving like that is ridiculous.
You're probably getting ignored half the time. He's probably getting ignored 95%.
Yep. Took me a few years to find my girlfriend. It was extremely rare to get any response at all let alone an actual conversation or date. But I never got shitty with anyone for not writing back.
Thanks for the MH :D
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BS, not true
That's rarely the case, try again ;)
I had to upvote this after seeing the ratio, I get why it's gone that way but understandings better than condemnation.You have to understand, it's unrealistic to expect girls on dating sites to respond to everyone they're not interested in. They get too many messages for that.But I don't think that girls don't understand just how gruelling dating sites are for guys who actually want a relationship. Sitting their going through profiles and coming up with unique icebreakers when the odds are your not going to get a reply, It does breed frustration. Some people get lucky but most dont.I'm guilty of doing it once when a girl on a dating site blocked me 2 hours before we were meant to meet. In that case I'd have been ok with a sorry I'm not interested and I'm not condoning it, but it was my closure and they'll never see it anyway.
@Edanurus Very reasonable reply
You're full of shit. Common decency dictates that she should reply honourably and say she isn't interested.Real gentleman don't throw pearls before swine
You do realise some girls get 100s of messages a day right? And replying is just wasting someone’s time if they aren’t interested
Then tell them you're not interested end of the story
@RumEro to a 100 people a day? You really think that is realistic? Sounds like you’re one of those types 🙄
@PrincessPie Well, somehow that doesn’t make someone feel less disrespected. I’m just telling you why someone, man or woman, would react in a certain way when they are intentionally ignored. It’s a weird feeling, perhaps even awful, as I’m sure you’ve experienced it sometime in your life.
Haha i don't use any dating sites
But I get ignored as well lol it’s not like I don’t know how it feels, but that reaction is entitled and desperate
@PoliceLivesMatter you've been ignoring me ands my love for ages
@PrincessPie, Also, if I may add, it’s immensely shallow to approach this situation with this mindset. Basically, you’re treating these men, people, as if they’re items. You don’t want this item, so you won’t reply to it, but this one is nice, so you’ll reply to it. It’s a mindset that breeds a shallow way of thinking and looking at men/people. It’s NOT ego that’s driving Medi to react in a certain way but could possibly be 1) disrespect and 2) being treated unlike a human being.
The reaction isn’t necessarily entitled or desperate, if you understand what the reasonings are. I think people who say it is entitled or desperate are either 1) trying to remove blame from them or 2) don’t want to think too hard. My experience? It’s usually both one and two
That is what dating sites are about, finding someone you’re compatible with and who is right for you.. you think I don’t get treated as a item by guys too? I get sexual objectification messages daily, if anything they’re treating me like objects so that isn’t true lol
And not replying to him is not treating him like a human being? Lol I can see you haven’t experienced online dating by your approach on this
No, but don’t say he is entitled or desperate. That doesn’t really make sense. It’s pretty clear why Medi reacted the way he did, if you take the time to think about it. Just because other people ignore or objectify you, doesn’t make it right for you to do it to them. That’s EXACTLY what you’re doing. It’s probably why I stay away from online stuff because it breeds a certain mindset of viewing either men or women as objects and you just have to be rude to them because that’s the very nature of online dating. It’s obviously not a good thing. I think I would’ve reacted differently than Medi, but it’s not entitlement.
He would of sent the same message to 100s of girls.. he didn’t pick me out thinking oh she’s the one for me, it’s completely entitled and shows that he is a horrible pathetic person, only people who tend to agree with this are people who are extremely unsuccessful with women and that is usually there own fault
Well, you don’t know that and even if that was true and Medi did send the same message to 100s of girls, you still are doing the exact same thing. You’re just as bad as him and perpetuating the same thing online as all those other people. All I’ve ever said was that I understood why Medi reacted the way he did. I never said it was the most optimal reaction. I also mentioned that people are quick to blame this person Medi but not blame you. You know why? Perhaps they’ve done the same thing and do not want to be typecasted as the bad person who is partially at fault as well. I’m not into the online stuff, so I have a unique perspective into this. If I were like you, I’d probably blame Medi too, just to make me feel better
Exactly! It’s completely entitled
It is. Another thing it is, is a wanker swerved. So pat yourself on the back for that. Good that he showed his nasty side early on, I say!
Yes, it isn’t tinder so I didn’t match with me he just randomly messaged me lol
Gathered as much, oh dear... i feel i should at least mail you a box of godiva :(
Yes please :D
This happened me yesterday!! I didn't want to talk "what turns me on" and got to hear I'm not even that pretty, must be on my period, lack confidence etc etc.
@pakkotestaa oh my gosh, what it was wrong with people Most people wouldn't want to answer such an intrusive question. I wish these guys could be called out for this, but no, it's often behind anonymity.
I could be wrong, but I think okcupid or pof might have a function for reporting people.
@Sixgun77 I'm not sure, but you're right, they probably do. Ok cupid wasn't that bad when I tried it, but there were still some bad apples.
When I met my girlfriend, she'd only been on for a month or so, and hadn't gotten too many horror stories yet. We consider ourselves lucky.
The bad thing in Tinder is that you can't report anyone who has unmatched you. Otherwise I would've done that.
@pakkotestaa Oh yea, tinder is so bad about bad apples. pof is like a cesspool too. o. O
Lol pof is where I met my gf! I understand though, I've heard stories.
@Sixgun77 lolol no disrespect meant! it's just the stories o. O O. o my mom tried it and she had horror stories. lol though it was on OkCupid that she met some African scammer dude pretending to be a US soldier >.>
None taken! OKC and pof both have tons of horror stories. All I ever got on tinder were camgirl paysite scams, and one lady who ghosted when she found out I'm not tall.
@Sixgun77 lol oh the camgirls, I don't know if you've ever had Skype but they tried to scam my ex more than once.also, wow... her priorities... so warped.
What really sucked was that we'd been texting constantly for a week and were trying to schedule a meetup. We were getting along great, then as soon she found out, she said she couldn't deal with it and cut all comms.
@Sixgun77 Wow, people like that aren't really worth your time. Now you have your girlfriend :)
Would you go upto a girl in person and say "heyaaaa, how are you babygirl?"They would either ignore you or tell you to fuck off lol.
I agree crazy8000. Just because it’s online, doesn’t make it justifiable to be rude to someone. I believe online makes people lazy and rude in how they interact with people.
@PoliceLivesMatter Should i reply to "hey bbz your so sexy i'd like to stick my cock up your ass" then? your logic is flawed on this lol
@PrincessPie Only if i ask...Okay im done, back to work lol.
Well that’s different clearly... Medi messaged you rather neutrally, then got frustrated when you didn’t respond, when you ignored.
Plus people don't talk to people the same way online as in realife so you can't even compare it, people are so much more forward, blunt and rude online because they're hiding behind a screen.. you can't expect any girl to reply to you just because you messaged them, that IS entitled, i message people and guess what get ignored and i move on.
Well, I don’t recall saying anything online to someone that I wouldn’t say in person. That’s just me. This Medi guy could’ve been a truly bad guy, who knows? All I have to say is, if you truly look at and think about what you’re doing online as well, you not only perpetuate this thinking but you’re also no different than those you do not like. It IS really the same thing, but it might not be obvious to you. This is probably why I stay offline when it comes to meeting women. I can talk to someone just fine in person and don’t have to feel like a hypocrite online
Why not just meet people face to face? You wouldn’t ignore someone face to face but you would online? That’s hypocritical and can easily be corrected once you realize you know what you’re doing. You may not want to reply to the 100 messages, but it is the right thing to do. Just... don’t perpetuate shallow mindset online. It makes you interact and view people differently. Not good in my opinion
@PoliceLivesMatter thing is online dating IS shallow and so is dating in general, we are all fishing out the one person who is right for us, if someone came up to me and said "hey baby girl how are you" in real life I WOULD also ignore it, its creepy and over familiar and quite intimidating for a girl, more so if she's alone.
@PoliceLivesMatter I do meet people face to face by the way
Also, I don’t understand why have his name and face revealed as well...
@PrincessPieWhy must you be as others?An attractive person leads and shows the way.An unattractive person tries to be one in the bunch, comes with excuses to justify, are shallow, blame othersWhich one are you?
@PoliceLivesMatter because you can’t see his face and it’s only his first name you can’t track someone down from that or i wouldn’t off
Why should you use that degrading looking down opening line in the first place "heyaaa, how are you babygirl?" ?
@PrincessPie I guess it’s not about tracking them him down as much as it is a humiliation and decency factor. I’m sure that’s his name and his face, and even though you can’t really see it crystal clear, it’s still visible. You could’ve had the same effect without necessarily showcasing the face and name I believe.
@PoliceLivesMatter you’re looking for arguements 🙄 there’s no humiliation if the person can’t be found or tracked, there is no way that guy can be found from his first name and a non visible picture, you’re looking for a debate lol
I’m looking for an argument, I’m just being honest. His picture is up and it’s pretty visible, albeit not crystal clear. Meaning, I could notice him in a crowd of people. Also, 2 seconds... it takes 2 seconds to screenshot the photo and edit it to where you scramble the name and facial features with black ink if you have an iPhone. I don't know how Samsung does it. That’s actually the BIGGEST issue I have here, is just his face and name revealed, essentially destroying the other’s privacy. Medi being rude isn’t an issue, it’s the exposure you’ve created.
@PoliceLivesMatter you could not make him out in a crowd of people at all, I just zoomed into the picture none of his facial features are visable.. all you can tell is he is a man with brown hair, if it was visible photo sure, but it’s not so it’s a non issue
I’m NOT looking for an argument lmfao
@PoliceLivesMatter you’re telling me you have super sonic eyes
No where could you make out a tiny blurred image..
Still I’m not sure you’re really getting what I’m saying. Is it possible to notice him from a crowd? Possibly. That isn’t the issue though. It’s the fact that you couldn’t take the time to just blot out the face and name, that’s it. I’m sure it wasn’t laziness because it only takes a second, so it must’ve been something else you know?
@PoliceLivesMatter it was the fact you can recognise him and his identity is still safe 😂 this is my point I didn’t need to blur out something that can’t be seen
Well, if you really want an honest answer, people have gotten others’ identity from seemingly vague photos just like the one you displayed. It’s not that hard to do you know. To make a picture much more detailed from its original state and then match that to the name “Medi” in one of the most popular online dating sites. Then you can even narrow that down to England or wherever. Still that isn’t the point.
@PoliceLivesMatter who the hell on here would care enough to do that? You’re the only person to mention this by the way and a lot of people have answered, it’s not going to happen no one is going to find medi lol, id obviously not put anyone’s identity out there and a name and a very tiny blurred picture isn’t doing that
@PrincessPieThese are private messages I’m assuming? You posted his pic and name on here thinking that just because it’s slightly blurry, means everything is okay. You’re not supposed to post private messages, especially if you have a photo and name attach. It’s just not right, that’s all. It was the only reason I was even interested in this question in the first place because I didn’t see any censoring of the photo and name. It’s clear it’s wrong, but you don’t or can’t admit it for some reason.
I dont even care about this Medi guy, but it’s the principle you know.
@PoliceLivesMatter It’s one of 100s of messages lol you’re making a mountain out of a mole hill and I’m not going to give you the answer you want because I disagree, unless you can find out the persons identity from a post it’s a non issue as I said before
Well, you don’t have to give me an answer because I know you know it’s not right however you spin it. Also, if it’s one out of 100s of messages, why post his pic and name and make a post about it. You could’ve done this post without the name and pic, and it would’ve had the same exact effect. I don't know why you didn’t though, is beyond me
@PoliceLivesMatter because he happened to be the only one who told me to fuck off, which is exactly what the question is about
the point of scribbling out a image is so the persons identity can’t be found, his identity can NOT be found so that’s why I disagree that anything is wrong, for it to be “wrong” his identity would have to be at stake which it is not
It doesn’t matter.. I think, and perhaps I’m wrong, that your anger and confusion is why you didn’t care to keep his identity private. I think you wanted, in a way, to expose or humiliate this person. You could’ve written everything down word for word or even, for the 100th time, blurred out the name and face. Everyone gets angry, and this man could’ve been a nice person, but when he realized he was being treated incorrectly, he acted in this way. A lot of women I’ve seen act exactly like him and they aren’t bad people who are entitled, just mad that they are treated as items, disregarded, and disrespected. You did it 2x, first time you ignored him intentionally, and second, you posted his face and pic, private message is supposed to be PRIVATE. Come on now
@PoliceLivesMatter no I’m not angry at him at all and as usual you’re reading into stuff that doesn’t exist and which isn’t there, not everything has a deep meaning, he can’t be found I didn’t scribble the photo for that exact reason or I would of done which I have with messages on here before because there identity could be found which is the point of the scribble out in the first place...
@PoliceLivesMatter his identity IS private, this is the whole point, everything you’re saying makes no sense
It’s my nature lol. My brain must’ve been a reincarnation of a detective from a past life because I can’t seem to keep digging down to the very core of something. Ultimately, everything has some motive or reasoning, I believe. You did what you did, possibly out of anger, confusion, or both. There’s always a reason for everything, always a cause. There’s nothing that doesn’t have some reason or cause behind it.
No, his identity isn’t private anymore. These were private messages between you and him, and you broke that first rule. I know how he roughly looks, I know his name, and I probably know where he is too. If I was just a little more tech savvy, I could get everything else, just based off his blurry pic and his name. I’m not tech savvy nor do I care in the slightest
@crazy8000 You look like you know it better. You must be one of the guys who go crazy on dating apps.
@crazy8000 Bullshit. You clearly don't know what males are like when they get told no.
Try expectations, get pissed off for some reason like writing something in profile that she can't live up to or that he lowe himself to tha same level as her but in the opposite direction. those are some of it.To ignore goes as passive agression, also as a stereotypical treat from a narcissistic brat or the common thing for both self-absorbed because they can't get out what they are after from the other one they tend to ignore them, even sometimes makes a fuzz about it when it goes against them to get away with their ignorance.
@crazy8000 Why message her if you feel you have to lower yourself? That was your choice, she doesn't deserve your rage.To ignore means she's either busy or trying to be polite about rejecting you. It's hard to tell someone to their face "no;" especially because he may make threatening remarks to her. I've had a friend get a message saying he'd find her and beat the shit out of her.Women can ignore whoever they don't want to date, just like you can. People have standards and preferences. Who you date is entirely up to you. That's like crying racism because people prefer to date their own race, or sexism/transphobia if you don't want to date someone with who lacks certain genitalia. You're not owed a response, even if it is rude for her to ignore you.Move on.
They're searching for dignity in an undignified world. You decide whether or not they get it but don't be surprised if they get cynical and say something out of frustration when you don't acknowledge their existence.
@whostosay We don't decide who gets dignity, we have no control over people's lives, we are not their masters nor their Gods. People choose their own paths and where they find their pride and happiness, if you place all of that on one person whom you don't know, this is your own choosing. You need to find love, dignity, light, and happiness in yourself if you want to truly obtain it. You'll never find it in the acknowledgment of others because it is so fleeting.Peace and love, brother.
You know what I have to agree with that
Ye gal they aren’t garlic bread 🥖 GBGTOW ❤️
omg u just read my mind
What every single message you get? I don’t expect someone to reply to me if they aren’t that is entitled
It only has to be short "sorry I'm not interested"Otherwise they may spend weeks waiting for a reply. And yes every message you get.
If I told him he wasn’t interested you think he wouldn’t say fuck you as well? 😂
Also, baby girl is cringe worthy yuck lol
They're probably antisocial and haven't really had any encounters with real women and therefore get easily frustrated
Some men are really disrespectful and act on impulse and get easily frustrated, women like that exists too, but the majority I think are male
So you weed out assholes by ignoring everyone and wait to see who gets mad? Good plan 👍
I'm talking to the interesting ones. Don't have time for everyone 💁
Then why you try to match with people you "don't have time to talk?"
? If I have an interesting conversation going with one guy I might not have time to answer all of the other "hello hows your day" messages 😂
Which is reasonable, what is not though is that you send likes if busy ;)
I don't think you know how tinder works.
Yeah but some guys even get pissed off with the polite "no thank you"and. Not justifying anything but a lot of times we feel like we're going to be cursed out either way. I've had guys do the same thing on sites when I've messaged them. I just took it as a sign of disinterest and moved on.
I mean for me I know I am ugly but I just want reassurences that is what the issue is. Because a lot of women I like seem to have same qualities interests etc but my only thing I can think of is my looks put you off.
Half the time you'll still get a fuck you response even if you do reply no thank you. So there's no point in replying guys need to stop acting like bitches. The quicker you learn nobody ows you shit in life the better off you'll be
That1tallguy, exactly! But in all fairness women can be the same way with rejection lol
POF is the worst for this in my opinion. You put up a pic, target a nearby area, and pay money. You then get mutual matches, which means at the very least you both somewhat like the other person's face. Then when you spend effort crafting a good first message you get no reply at all. In fact POF even tells you message read deleted or message unread deleted. This does anger me. Why swipe yes if you are unwilling to even chat a little.
True and it's difficult not to get annoyed. I gave up on dating sites instead. E. g. I once created a second tinder account with a pic of my torso only (I workout quite regularly). Then I matched the same girl I had early matched on my normal account and hadn't replied my carefully crafted message. On the account with chest only, I was trying to be as shitty as possible yet she literally replied within seconds of my messages. That got me so annoyed that I stopped messaging after she gave me her mobile number. I even went back on my normal account when she was chatting to send her one more message but got no response
Good point.That's rarely the case, try again ;)